Unintended
by consumedbyheavenlyfire
Summary: AH/AU. Life doesn't always work out the way we plan...
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This was another "version" of a story I had been working on similar to Trinity. It's the same world, the only difference is that Bella doesn't have nearly as disturbing a past as she does in the latter. Nor is Sam a rival love interest in this one. The setup is pretty much the same, though. Bella is Ness' and Edward's teenage daughter (Ness and Edward aren't related in this one for those who haven't read this before or Trinity). Ness is a single mother though Bella has really been raising herself. Jake was married to Ness for a year before this stretch of the story (yep, I went there) and is now divorced from her and dating another woman. This particular chapter starts off her seventeenth birthday party that Ness is throwing for her. Jake's girlfriend's name is Chelsea which it always was but I changed it in Trinity to Nicole because I thought it sounded better but I decided to leave the original names in this particular posting. Same goes for Trinity's David, he was originally named Andrew; Elise/Lise = Lindsey/Lindz; Nate = Nick; Aidan = Adam; Katie = Kelly; Luke = John; etc. I apologize for any confusion.**

**None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that as well. Also, I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy. I'm not promoting and/or condoning any inappropriate and/or questionable themes that come up in this story. I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in this story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff.**

**Like Trinity, this doesn't start out like a proper story would. Instead, you're coming into it somewhat midway. The story is in progress in many different areas in its time line and I just don't have time at the moment to go back and try to write a new beginning or sum up the one I already have in place. I apologize for that and hope to be able to give you the whole thing in a proper readable format soon. **

**The title is a temporary one. I was torn between many different ones and I picked this one to be it for now, even if it doesn't seem to make any sense lol.**

**I'm reposting this for a certain small group of girls that have already read these "versions" in all their different stages and told me how much they loved it and asked me to repost it. Thank you for not only reading it but encouraging me to continue. You know who you are. ;-) x3**

**Thank you to my main girls for reading this and giving me their feedback when I was first writing it last year and encouraged the muse to keep going. It was all written for you. ;-) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her. **

* * *

**BPOV**

I bent down, smiling. "Thanks for the ride, Aunt Alice. I'll see you there."

She waved to me. "You got it, sweetie. See you in a bit."

I shut the door and started my trek up to Jake's apartment which was just a few doors down. Aunt Alice beeped as she left and I turned to give her one last wave.

When I got to Jake's door, I felt around the top for the spare key he always left around for me and unlocked the door when I found it. There was music playing from the stereo in the living room.

"Jake?" I called out.

"Oh, hey, Bells! Just gimme a second! I'm just finishing up shaving!"

I shook my head in amusement, smirking, and stepped into his bedroom, stopping right outside the open bathroom door, staying where I couldn't be seen nor could he. "So, is Sam going to be there?"

"Yep. He might be a bit late, though. You know him and work."

I chuckled and leaned against the wall.

"Ali leave?"

"Yeah, she just dropped me off, said she'd see us there. I have to tell you, I'm so glad I'm going with you. Now I can hide behind you when we walk in."

Jake laughed. "Now why do I have a feeling that's why you asked me to take you?"

"No," I said playfully. "I also wanted to see you."

He laughed again. "Well, at least you admit it."

"Of course I'll always admit that I want to see you. It's the truth."

He chuckled quietly but I still heard him over the hum of his electric razor. "Well, I'm glad. I always want to see you, too. Oh shit, that reminds me. Chels was able to get someone to cover her shift so we're gonna pick her up on the way."

My mood took a nosedive. I couldn't stand his girlfriend. She was twenty three, a strawberry blonde, had a perfect body and thought she knew it all and acted like it, too. I never understood why Jake would date her. But, my main problem with her was being the reason why I had seen less and less of Jake lately as well as why I didn't have my own key for this place anymore. She made it very clear to Jake that she didn't care for his close relationship with his former teen stepdaughter. He never told me that explicitly but it wasn't hard to pick up when he barely touched even just to say goodbye when she was around. Chelsea was nice enough to me, I guess, but...I couldn't forgive her for taking Jake away like she had. Maybe if she hadn't, I could accept her more.

And then I remembered why I wanted to talk to Jake alone tonight. No, maybe I wouldn't ever be able to accept even if she was the greatest person in the world.

"That's okay, right?"

I cleared my throat quietly. "Um, yeah. That's fine." I forced a chuckle. "I just wish you kind of told me so I could have gone with Andrew. He really wanted to bring me but I told him it was you and me tonight. But, no worries. He can take me home."

"You sure?"

"Yeah," I forced out cheerily. I bit my lip and glanced around the room. I noticed our picture was missing and in its place was one of Jake and Chelsea. "Oh, hey, did you move the picture frame I gave you out there somewhere?"

There was a pause and I knew he had hoped I wouldn't notice, meaning he had been the one to move it and not Chelsea. "Uh, yeah. I put it up near the TV. This way everyone can see it," he chuckled uneasily.

I felt a knot in my stomach. Up by the TV where pictures of the guys and his family and everyone else were. I had always been separate but now I was part of the "and everyone else" group. The lump started to form in my throat but I pushed it back down. "Oh. That's cool." I walked out of his room before I could see anything else like things Chelsea left there or little gifts she gave him. I was going to check out our picture in its new spot but then I realized it would probably depress me more than I already felt when it only reflected the past and not the present state of our relationship. I was being slowly phased out of Jake's life and that bothered me, though I tried my best not to show it.

I perused his DVD collection and all his usual favorites were there, making me smile, remembering all the times he'd made me sit through them with him, trying to convince me why they were the best films out there. However, that smile faded when a few romantic comedies sat at the end of the first row. Jake did not watch romantic comedies unless somebody made him. And I had a pretty good idea who that someone was because it certainly wasn't me.

"You ready to go?" I heard behind me. I turned around, making sure to paste a smile on my face. Jake looked good. He wore black pants, a light colored dress shirt with a tie to match.

"Yeah. You look nice."

He grinned. "Thanks. You look very nice yourself over there. So, how does it feel to be seventeen?"

I shrugged. "The same as it did sixteen."

He chuckled and finished buttoning his right cuff. "Well, happy birthday, anyway."

"Thanks."

He nodded. "So, you all set?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Great. Let's head out then. I told Chels I'd be there in ten minutes. Mind shutting that off for me?"

I kept a pleasant expression on my face and did as he asked. After he locked up the apartment, we walked to the car in his designated parking spot. I was starting to get in the front when Jake stopped me. "Oh, hey. You mind sitting in the back? Since we're going straight to Chels'?"

I bit my lip and closed the door. "Sure."

He smiled gratefully at me. "Thanks."

So, now I was relegated to the backseat, even for just the ride over to pick up his girlfriend. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if this was the last of Jake I would see for a long while, if not completely.

He asked me how school was going and made general small talk. All things he would have known a year ago and not needed to be filled in on during a bi-monthly visit. He didn't even text me anymore like he used to or call every once in a while. He rarely returned my phone calls and he kept return texts short if I texted him. I was definitely losing him. And I did my best to keep that thought from my head as we pulled into Chelsea's apartment complex.

After we parked, Jake whipped out his phone and called her. "Yeah, Chels, we're here. Okay. Yep, see you in a bit. Yep, you, too." My heart clenched inside my chest when I knew what he was probably responding to at the end. I focused my eyes on my hands in my lap.

A minute or two later, Chelsea got into the front seat, looking great. "Sorry. Couldn't get Allison to shut up for a minute."

Jake laughed and she leaned over to kiss him hello. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hey," he whispered huskily before kissing her again. And then he started to back the car out of the parking space. "You look beautiful, babe. Absolutely beautiful."

"Aww, thank you." She smiled brightly at him and he picked up her hand, kissing it. I felt sick to my stomach watching all of this. Why didn't I just go with Andrew? I knew why but why didn't I account for this happening? Why?

"Oh, hey, Bella. How are you? Happy Birthday," she smiled back at me.

I forced a polite smile back. "Thank you. I'm doing good. How about you?"

"Couldn't be better. So, you excited for your party?"

I went to answer when Jake laughed. "Are you kidding? She hates parties. She's never wanted one. Right, Bella?"

I gave Chelsea a wan smile. "Um, yeah."

"Oh. Well, then, why are you having one now if you don't like them? Won't you just be uncomfortable?"

I seriously wanted to smack her in the back of the head and then Jake for even dating this girl. Instead, I just shrugged. "Not really."

Jake laughed again. "Uh huh. Guaranteed, you'll be polite, make your rounds but you'll find a quiet corner somewhere and disappear somewhere like you always do. Right?"

I smiled wanly again, this time at Jake in the rearview mirror. "Right." And then I stared out my window the rest of the ride. Which Chelsea didn't seem to mind because she automatically started talking to Jake. I tried to tune them out but when I heard them talking about moving in together, that they had already found an apartment and just needed to pick a moving day, it was hard to miss.

I was no longer beautiful to Jake, just nice. Now Chelsea was beautiful. He hadn't told me about him moving. He was embarrassing the crap out of me in front of his girlfriend for some strange reason. He was doing the kissing the hand thing he had always done to me. I also noted that when she got in the car he went from calling me Bells to Bella...I was completely forgotten. I wasn't his Bells and he wasn't my Jake anymore. Now he was Chelsea's Jake.

I was just glad that I hadn't given him the card I had tucked away in my bag for him. He just would have laughed or tossed it when he first got the chance so she wouldn't see it. I don't even know why I bought it or thought he'd like it. It was just a simple thinking of you card, a funny one to make him laugh. The funny thing is that when I started to write it out to him, I ended up pouring my heart out. I said how much I missed him and how I wished I could see him more. I listed everything I missed about us spending time together and at the very end, I told him I loved him. How he took it was up to him but now I wasn't the most important person in his world anymore. I was no longer his girl. She was.

I just closed my eyes and prayed the ride would end soon and that I wouldn't get sick or cry once.

...

When we arrived, I got out of the car to find Jake taking Chelsea's hand and pulling her along, not even looking back to see if I was following. He pointed the fob back at the car over his shoulder, locked it and started chuckling at something Chelsea was telling him. I let them go into the restaurant and decided I needed to get some air before I went in. I couldn't have everyone seeing me crying, talk about embarrassing as well as setting myself up for a thousand questions.

I headed off to the side and found a fountain with a bench near it. Why my mother had chosen this restaurant and to hold a party for me in it, I will never know. But at least it was nice and it provided me this little spot to catch my breath.

A minute or so later, I heard a familiar voice. "Hey."

I turned around, surprised. "Andrew. What are you doing out here?"

He smiled sheepishly at me and walked over. He looked nice in his dress shirt and tie as well as his khakis. Andrew had always been very good-looking. Why he ever wanted to date me, I would never know. "Um..."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You were smoking again, weren't you?"

He sat down, sighing. "It was only one. Just to ease my nerves. Your mom is kind of...she's intense at times. She scoped me out when I got here and started hounding me about what songs to dance to with you, how I should be in this position when cutting the cake and...I just needed a breather."

"Oh no," I moaned. I dropped my forehead into my hands. "I knew this would happen. She's going to make it a nightmare. Crap." I sighed and sat up, lowering my hands. "Sorry she did that to you."

He waved a hand dismissively. "It's fine."

I bit my lip. "You know, thank you for coming to this and putting up with all of it. I know it's...well, nuts," He laughed. "But, it means the world to me that you're here."

He smiled over at me. "Nervous as hell, aren't you?"

"About to have a heart attack actually and die of fright."

He laughed again and I just chuckled, shaking my head. "No, but seriously, I'm glad you're here."

He took my hand. "That makes two of us." He then slid in closer to me. "You know, I might have an idea that can relax us both."

I smirked. "Oh, really? And what would that be, Mr. Baxter?"

He smirked back at me. "Just this." He cupped my face gently and kissed me. I could taste the cigarette he had just had; it was disgusting. But I was determined to ignore it for his sake. I didn't want to hurt his feelings. He was rattled and probably forget to chew some gum before going back in.

I smiled against his lips. "I think you've got a great idea there."

He chuckled. "Yeah. I've got an even better idea."

"Oh yeah, what's that?"

"This," He kissed me again, this time passionately but softly as well. He continued to kiss me until all my tension melted away. He drew back and smiled at me, stroking my cheeks. "Happy Birthday," he whispered. "You look beautiful, you know."

I smiled shyly at him. "Thank you."

He grinned and went to kiss me again when a loud throat clearing interrupted us. We turned to look behind us and saw Jake standing there, his arms crossed, looking like he'd rather be elsewhere. Well, now he knew how I felt when he made out with his girlfriend in front of me. "And here I was thinking you'd skipped town to get out of this thing while I wasn't looking." He glared in Andrew's direction. Andrew looked uncomfortable but he cleared his throat and offered his hand to me, helping me up. Jake's glare intensified at him until Andrew glued his eyes to the ground.

That pissed me off. Who the hell was he to stand there and make my boyfriend feel uncomfortable? I didn't do it to his bimbo, did I? How dare he try to intimidate the one person who tried to make me feel better instead of making fun of me for hating parties? The one person who thought I looked beautiful and not just nice? Was he kidding me?

I grabbed Andrew's hand and pulled him around the bench towards Jake. "You're right," I snapped. "You weren't looking." I glared up at him as I passed.

Andrew glanced behind us after a minute and gave a low whistle. "Man, I think he was going to take my head off or something."

I snorted. "Not on my watch. It's none of his business what I do or who I date."

"No. I mean, when you said that to him and he watched us walk away. He looked like he wanted to punch something."

I snorted again. "Good." I pulled Andrew into the entrance. Maybe he'll break his hand if I'm lucky," I muttered under my breath.

I slowed down once there was no need to rush and let Andrew lead me to the private room they had set up, refusing the host's help of finding it since he had been in there before. The doors were closed but I could hear music playing loudly from inside. Andrew smiled at me, squeezing my hand. "You ready for this?"

"Not really."

He laughed. "Good enough for me." He opened the door, pulling us through, keeping his arms around me from behind and walking us both in one step at a time. I felt his chin on my shoulder and I just giggled. But that stopped when I saw the large party my mother had assembled and how they were all now looking at me. To say I gulped and wanted to hide was an understatement.

The DJ on the stage stopped the music and announced the birthday girl was here. Everyone started clapping, rushing at me to wish me a happy birthday. Mom was going to die later and I would get Andrew to help me hide the body.

I was nervous but Andrew kept his hands on me for which I was grateful. I smiled as politely as I could and thanked the well-wishers, saying hello here and there, giving hugs to Aunt Alice, Mom, Nick, Jared and the guys, Jess and Lindz...Everybody I pretty much knew was here, except for my dad and Esme. But I would be seeing them this weekend, flying there tomorrow, so I was okay with that.

Jess and Lindz pulled me over to the round table that was designated mine and had them, Sean, Jeremy, Andrew, Jake, Mom and Nick listed to sit there and eat with me. I had requested that of Mom, wanting all my close friends there. Aunt Alice was supposed to be sitting with us, too, but apparently Chelsea had taken her seat, making her sit elsewhere. I just added it to the list of why I could not stand that woman. She certainly was no close friend of mine. Jake was pissing me off more and more by the minute it seemed. He knew I had wanted Aunt Alice there. Couldn't he have found another place for him and Chelsea to sit since she showed up last minute? Unbelievable.

Mom came over to me, speaking low in my ear. "You can mingle later. The DJ's gonna play some music. You and your friends can start dancing."

I rolled my eyes. "Mom, is this really necessary? You know I can't dance."

"The staff needs more time to get dinner out. This is already all set up. Just please do as I ask."

I sighed. "Sure, sure." Andrew appeared next to me when Mom walked away. "We have to start dancing. Feel like taking the risk?" I teased.

Andrew smiled at me. "Sure."

He took my hand and started to lead me away when I stopped. "Oh, wait. I almost forgot." I quickly unbuttoned the sweater I had been wearing over my dress, all buttoned up. I slipped it off of my shoulders and hung it over my chair. I turned back to Andrew to find him staring at me, his eyes wide.

I blushed. "What? Do I look bad?"

He shook his head and swallowed. "No. No. Not at all. You look...good, Bella. Really good."

I smiled and took his hand again. "Thanks."

Andrew leaned in and whispered in my ear, "But you're not dancing with anyone else tonight except me. At least no guys. Not with looking as hot as you do right now."

I laughed but blushed, biting my lip. I was grateful that the DJ chose then to start playing music. Andrew grinned and lifted up my hand, kissing it. "Let's go." I giggled and let him pull me towards the one thing I hated more than a party: the dancefloor.

...

**JPOV**

I sat rigidly, watching Ness speaking to Bella in hushed tones. I couldn't believe Bella had snapped at me like that. What the fuck? I wasn't the one that snuck off to go make out instead of walking into my party where I was expected to make an entrance.

I hadn't even known she hadn't been behind us until Ness barked at me, demanding to know where Bella was. I told her I'd go get her and left Chelsea to find our table. I figured maybe Bella had freaked out and decided to not go. I knew I'd probably have to talk her into it.

When I stepped outside, I glanced towards the area my car was in the parking lot but I didn't see anyone around there. I then started scanning the area and sure enough, I saw the water shooting up from a fountain in the distance. It was hidden behind some well trimmed trees with lights on them, but I figured if Bella would be anywhere, it would be there. I started walking towards it, thinking of all the things I would say to her to get her to come inside with me.

But all those thoughts stopped short when I saw Bella sitting on a bench with Andrew kissing her. What the- He had pulled away to whisper something to her that made her smile and blush. I couldn't hear what it was because of the sound of the running water but when I saw him lean back in to kiss her some more, I decided it was time to make my presence known. I cleared my throat and they jerked their heads towards me.

I was pissed. I'd had to leave my girlfriend inside to come get Bella because I thought she needed me and instead, I find her kissing this kid, willfully forgetting that there's a fucking party inside with her name on it. But when I thought about it, I knew Andrew had to have been the instigator in this scenario. If Bella had come here to breathe or even if he grabbed her in the parking lot without Chelsea and I noticing, it wasn't like Bella to sneak off to get some alone time with her boyfriend. Not when all of her family and friends were waiting inside for her. I couldn't help but glare at him.

When I tried to make a joke to make this situation less uncomfortable since I had seen Bella kissing this kid, it had the opposite effect. Instead, she had snatched his hand and pulled him away from me back to the restaurant, snapping at me as she went. I was in shock for a second and then I got angry. What the fuck was she pissed at me for? Why, because I caught her making out with her boyfriend? Because she knew I was here to make sure she went inside? What?

I just shook my head, dismissing the thoughts. I refused to get into a shitty mood because of her and make Chelsea and everyone else deal with it. Bella had been so hot and cold as of late (she was curt in texts; said how much she wanted to talk to me in voicemails and then bites my head off in person), I never knew what I was getting of the few times I'd had contact with her. I'm not an idiot, I know she didn't like Chelsea though she was polite for my sake. I also knew Chelsea wasn't so crazy about her, either, especially the close relationship we had, but she tried to be nice for my sake, too. I couldn't make them be friends if they didn't want to be. Bella was important to me, Chelsea knew that, but things had changed and I was in a relationship now and in order to make it work, I had to make some compromises.

Like the photo frame I had been hoping she wouldn't notice was missing from my room. I'd had to appease Chelsea on that one considering Bella wasn't my biological daughter, one I had raised or even family. I didn't say a word but Bella _was_ family, no more than that. She was my home and I knew I was hers. She was my best friend; she knew more about me than just about any other girl, including Chelsea. But, Chels had made it clear that boundaries needed to be set, to signify that I was taken now and it was inappropriate to be so affectionate with a sixteen year old girl (at the time). She tried to sell it to me, saying it would be better for Bella so she wouldn't be confused but I knew it was bullshit; I knew it was all her and her feeling threatened by the other number one girl in my life. So, in order to try to make things work with everyone, I kept mum when I noticed Bella's picture frame had been moved to the living room to where all the other photos were. I shut my mouth when I saw a picture of Chelsea and I had taken its place on my nightstand. I backed off on the physical affection somewhat in order to maintain the proper "boundaries" Chelsea wanted me to so she would feel more comfortable. I made sure Chelsea never felt threatened by Bella when she was around whether it was by using her nickname that sounded a lot like the one I'd given the former or giving her the rightful place a girlfriend should have at dinner tables, the movies, the car, stuff like that, all at her boyfriend's side. And it seemed to work. Chelsea was happier lately and so was I. We had even decided to move in together. Yeah, it hadn't been long, only a few months, but I was crazy about her and I knew she was just as crazy about me. She had already dropped the L word once though I didn't say it back. I wasn't quite at that point yet. Thankfully, she hadn't reamed me out for it, just smiled and kissed me.

So, we were getting more and more serious as time passed. We went apartment hunting which took up some of our time there for a bit, made arrangements to move, get out of our leases, start packing things, etcetera. Unfortunately, because I was so busy with that and had work on top of it, I had started to see Bella less and less. I felt guilty about it. I wanted to see her more, I did, but...this was important and I could always make it up to Bella after Chels and I had moved and were settled in. I'd explain it to Bella and she would understand. I hadn't officially told her about the big move yet but I know she heard us talking about it in the car so at least it wouldn't come as this big shock and generate questions that I really didn't want to answer but knew that I would because it was Bella asking. I could never lie to her.

I felt so distant from her lately. There were a few times she called me and I hadn't been able to get back to her, being so busy, and I told myself I'd call her as soon as I had time, but that time never came. She had texted me a couple of times but it always seemed to happen right at the busiest moments, when I was working on a car or at scoping out an apartment with Chels or at a movie with Chels. I made sure to reply to her but it was short and sweet due to the time constraints. And with the curt manner she'd text me, I felt bad but I had no desire to get back to her that quickly when she was like that.

I missed her. I really did. I missed my best friend; I missed my Bells.

I perked up though when I thought about the gift I bought for her. I had gotten us two tickets to the one play Bella had really wanted to see, never having been to a Broadway before. Yep, just us two. It would be a night for her and me only. I'd take her to dinner and then the play. I made sure Chelsea knew that this was strictly quality time for Bella and I, to make up for not being around lately as well as for her birthday. Chelsea, while it was obvious she wasn't thrilled, just smiled, kissed me and said she understood, telling me of a parking garage that she knew to be nearby that was cheaper than the usual rates. She had been really great about it and I felt even better about this night coming. It was in two weeks. I was looking forward to it. With that thought, I dismissed Bella's little snipe at me and headed back inside.

When I walked in, seeing Bella and Andrew ahead of me, in the throngs of people, I walked around all of it to see Chels sitting at our table, waving to me. I joined her, kissed her and sat back to watch the show. Knowing Ness, she probably had some sort of agenda planned. A few seconds later, I saw Jess and Lindsey pulling Bella to our table. I guess I should have known by the two pink and white balloons tied to the chair that that was where the birthday girl would be sitting. I was glad she'd be with us. It would make getting her alone for a minute to talk that much easier.

My smile faded when I saw Andrew approach her when Ness left. Andrew was an alright kid and I guess, if Bella had to date any high school senior, he was the best pick; she certainly could have done worse. But, I don't know, maybe it was just me being the overprotective best friend but I hated how much he touched her, kissed her and had his hands on her period. In my opinion, he was being just a little bit too liberal with the whole 'This is my girlfriend and I'm letting all you fuckers know' touching thing. I knew that Bella was crazy about him and just looking at him, it was more than obvious that he was also crazy about her. But, still, all the same, I wish he'd cool it with the whole being all over her deal. At least for tonight, while I was here. I hadn't come to this freakin' party to watch him constantly feel her up right in front of me, her mother and her friends.

Andrew started to pull her away when she appeared to have forgotten something. I saw her start to unbutton her sweater and when she peeled it off, my jaw dropped. What the fuck was she wearing? She had on a semi-white dress that was strapless and wasn't exactly full in the skirt area. Yeah, okay, it was long enough to keep her from flashing her underwear at everyone and pervs would have to work for it to be able to see anything, but...seriously? She looked good in it, no doubt about that. No, better than good but...whoa. My Bells would never wear something like that; she'd be too embarrassed, trying to cover up. I felt like my heart had stopped inside my chest as I saw my girl uncover all of that skin, showing it to the free world - the male world. Other guys around her, even the taken ones like Sean and even Nick, couldn't keep their eyes off of her.

Apparently, Andrew had the same reaction but recovered from it quicker than I and everyone else did. He leaned in, whispering something to her and I saw her blush. That angered me. I had a pretty good idea what he had just whispered to her and if he thought of unwrapping what he considered to be his own present at the end of the night, he had another thing coming. I'd pick Bella up and carry to my car, locking her in if I had to.

"Wow. Seems your little Bella isn't so little anymore," Chelsea commented. I nearly rolled my eyes at the jealousy evident in her tone. She had not only seen my reaction but Nick's and every other guy's. Obviously, she was pissed.

"Yeah," I murmured. "That's for sure. I wonder what made her decide to wear that."

"I don't know, man, but, wow." Nick whistled as he watched her walk away in her heels. I had to admit, she looked hot. If it was anyone other than my Bells, I'd be checking her out, too. Especially, since I knew she couldn't walk in heels and hated wearing them, but there she went, walking perfectly in her heels, swaying her hips as she walked unintentionally and whoa, her ass looked great. I felt sick at the thought and turned away, seeing Nick's eyes bugging out of his head as he watched her. "Now I understand why Ness looks so great at her age. Must be in the genes. Daaaaamn." And then he muttered, "Fuck. Had she been looking like that when I first met her, I'd have been hitting her up instead of her mom. Just look at those legs, they go on for miles. She is fucking hot!" Chelsea grimaced next to him and took a sip of her drink.

I glared at him. "You done?"

He seemed to jerk out of his stupor and glanced over at me, seeing just how much I wanted to kill him right now. He scratched his head, looking sheepish. "Uh, yeah. Sorry, dude. No filter sometimes, you know?"

"Yeah, I do know." I then leaned on my elbows in his direction. "And you better get it fucking fixed. I ever hear you talk about her like that again, I'll put you in the fucking hospital and you'll be eating strained peas from a tube for the rest of your life. You got me?"

Nick glared back at me. "Yeah. Easy, man. I got a little carried away. I didn't mean anything by it. Come on, when you were married to Ness, are you telling me that not once you never thought about how the daughter was looking like a better option than the mother?" Chelsea even looked at me for this one, arching an eyebrow.

"No," I growled. "I'm not some fucking sick pervert checking out minors. Keep your fucking tongue in your head next time. And if I ever find out you made a move on her or made her feel uncomfortable in any way, you're gonna have me to answer to."

Chelsea placed a hand on my chest, keeping me from getting up and attacking this motherfucker. "Sorry, Nick. He's a little overprotective when it comes to Bella." She gave me a pointed look, telling me silently to sit back down.

"Fuck off, Chels," I snapped. Her mouth dropped in shock as I got to my feet, almost knocking my chair over, and stormed away from them.

I knew I had overreacted but this was fucking Bella that sick fuck was talking about. He was fucking Ness and planning on beating off later to Bella. Fucking sick motherfucker. I was going to take care of this problem right now.

...

**BPOV**

"Andrew," I complained. "I can't dance to this. I suck."

He laughed. "Come on. I'll help you, okay? Just let me move you with me."

I blushed but allowed him to do just that. Since it was Bruno Mars' "Just the Way You Are", even though it was a bit uptempo at most parts, Andrew pulled me into him and took my hand in his. He moved us in slow circles. "I'm gonna spin you now. Slowly." I bit my lip but he did it, grinning at me when he was finished.

"That wasn't so bad," I beamed.

He winked at me, making me chuckle. He then pulled me in closer than last time, singing along with the song quietly, near my hair. I felt guilty as I listened to him. Why couldn't I love him? Why couldn't he be for me what Jake was, or used to be I should say? Why couldn't I let this silly infatuation, as my mother would call it, go? I took a deep breath and smiled by the time Andrew moved back to look at me, smiling himself. He kissed me softly and then I laid my head next to his, smiling when he kissed my bare right shoulder.

"Yo."

Andrew and I both looked up to see Jake absolutely fuming. My brows furrowed. What the hell was wrong with him? Was he really that pissed that I had snapped at him?

"Sorry to interrupt but I gotta talk to her a minute. Mind if I cut in and you get the next one?" He gave Andrew a look that left no room for any kind of refusal.

"Uh, sure," Andrew looked over at me confused. "I'll come get you at the end of the song, babe." He kissed my lips and then walked away, still glancing back at us uncertainly.

Jake filled my vision, taking Andrew's place. He placed his right hand on my back and grabbed my hand with his left. He started moving us around as slowly as Andrew had.

"What's up?" I asked, trying to remain cordial.

"You tell me," he snapped. "What's up with that dress?"

I blushed slightly. "It's a dress. What's up with you giving me shit about it?" I snapped back.

He glared down at me. "You might as well be wearing a towel for all the skin you're showing. It's barely covering your ass."

I scoffed and pushed him away, going to leave when he grabbed my hand and pulled me off into a corner. "Why are you so intent on making me feel like shit tonight, huh, Jake? It's my birthday! What is it with you and this day?"

He ignored me. "You need to put your sweater back on. Had I known that was what was underneath, I wouldn't have driven you here until you changed."

I scoffed again, staring up at him in angry shock. "Last time I checked, Jake, I'm seventeen, not twelve. You're not my father. So, stop acting like it."

"No, you're right, I'm not," he growled, leaning in, glaring at me intensely. "If he were here, he'd be flipping out way worse and probably dragging you back home to change. I'm giving you the option of covering up before I do that."

My face burned. "You've got a hell of a lot of nerve! What, you're gone for three months and suddenly you show back up and think you can boss me around? I don't think so!" Who the hell did he think he was?

He ignored me again. "All the guys are checking you out! Even Nick was checking you out and I almost killed him for some of the shit he said! Even Chelsea was shocked!"

That made me snap. "Like I give a fuck what she thinks of me or says! She's just jealous!"

He snorted. "Of what? Wearing something that flashes an open for business sign to the whole male population in this fucking place? The way you're dressed right now is like giving your boyfriend the green light, making him think you're _his_ present for later tonight. I saw the way he was looking at you!"

"Good," I hissed at him. "Because that's exactly what's going to happen at the end of the night. And it's not like it hasn't happened before."

I saw some anger drain from his eyes and saw them tighten in pain. "Who are you? You're not the Bells I've known the past fucking three years."

I wanted to hurt him, just as badly as he hurt me. "The Bells you knew is gone. She disappeared bit by bit with every fucking phone call you didn't return, every text message you sent that made clear I was a bother, every time you canceled plans with her before that first month so you could go off and fuck your girlfriend!" His face didn't change but something flashed in his eyes and for the first time in a long time, I couldn't read him. "That Bells isn't here anymore. She grew up and stopped waiting around for someone who promised never to leave but then walked away from her the first second he could and all for a piece of ass! I'm seventeen, I wear what I want, Mom's okay with it, Andrew's okay with it and I am certainly okay with it. Don't like what you see? There's the door," I gestured to it behind me with my thumb. "It's not like you're really here for me anyway. You don't fucking forget someone exists especially when it's that someone's birthday, because your girlfriend is walking with you. You don't not hug your supposed best friend after three fucking months of you ignoring her. You don't put your best friend in the fucking backseat of your car and keep it open for no one just so your girlfriend won't see you possibly sitting close to her. You don't make fun of her in the fucking car on the drive over, in front of someone she doesn't know all that well! And you certainly don't say fuck you to her by tossing a goddamn photo frame she put together for you and lied to her, saying how you wanted it on your nightstand to look at every night when you fall asleep because of how much you miss her and then replace it with you and your fucking girlfriend who you see all the fucking time anyway! You're not here for me. Who are you kidding? Yourself? I'll tell you what this is. It's the yearly obligatory appearance, staying for an hour or two, and then bouncing and going off to fuck your girlfriend some more and even that appearance will disappear by next year. You're not here for me, Jacob. You haven't been for the last three months and some things changed in that time. You don't like the changes? Too fucking bad. You don't get to have a say anymore. You lost that right the first time you bailed on me to bang her in your apartment! Oh yeah, you didn't know that I knew about that, did you? Remember how you lied and told me you were sick, fake coughing and everything on the phone? I bet you didn't know that like the idiot I was back then I believed you, made you some chicken soup and walked, that's right, walked all the way to your goddamn apartment, let myself in with my key, thinking you were sleeping, only to hear you and Chelsea getting it on with her screaming how good you were fucking her and you telling her how she felt so fucking good! I left, I cried, I got over it. Big deal. All you had to do was be honest with me but you couldn't even do that! So, _Best Friend_, you don't get a fucking say at all in what I choose to wear! None! Everyone else was there to pick up the pieces that you couldn't bother to give a fuck about, Andrew being one of them! So fuck you and fuck your goddamn macho bravado bullshit! Feel free to leave! This way Alice can get her seat back, another person who was there when you couldn't care less! Fuck you, Jake! Fuck! You!"

I stormed away, ignoring the pained shock on his face when I mentioned how I had known he had lied to me that time he said he was sick. I hadn't meant to let that out or anything I said, but I was pissed. How dare he insult me and what I'm wearing all in one breath when he couldn't be bothered the last three months? I found Andrew and grabbed his hand.

"You okay, babe? He didn't yell at you, did he?"

I shook my head, smirking. "Nope. He just didn't like what I was wearing and wanted me to change. I told him to go to hell. I can't be bothered worrying about him. Now, as for you, Mr. Baxter, I want you to come outside with me." He nodded, making me smirk wider in my satisfaction and I pulled him out into the hall.


	2. Chapter 2

**Here things start to get somewhat muddy. This is Bella's seventeenth birthday party. In NYS, seventeen is the legal age of consent and NYS is where this is taking place. Jake is almost ten years older than her but with Bella's previous life experiences, they meet somewhere in the middle with maturity. **** I'm not promoting and/or condoning any inappropriate and/or questionable themes that come up in this story. I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**************If you've read Trinity, you'll most likely notice that some of these events are identical to the ones that happened in that story though they happened for different reasons in each story line. **

**Thank you for all of your feedback. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**JPOV**

I was still reeling from everything Bella had said. I felt so fucking bad. I'd hurt her worse than I had imagined.

And that fucking day I was supposed to pick her up and take her to the movies...I'd fucked up there, big time. I had no idea she had made soup for me and walked it over. I had no idea she was even there. After all the shit she'd heard when I was with Ness, she had to hear me and Chels going at it, knowing I'd lied to her. Fuck.

I honestly had intended to keep our "date" as we called it but Chels showed up unexpectedly and when I told her where I was going, not thinking when I used that word, she had lost it. I had barely calmed her down when she told me to cancel my supposed date or we were done. So, in order to placate her, I did just that. Then she pounced on me and we ended up fucking...most of that night. And now...

I felt like fucking crying when I imagined Bella letting herself into my apartment, hearing that shit, realizing the truth, leaving to go back home and crying the whole way, constantly wiping her face. I felt a lump in my throat when I remembered I was supposed to take her to see a movie she had been wanting to see for months and she wouldn't see it without me. And then I...

I slumped down in my chair and dropped my head into my hands.

"So, I take it the whole dress talk didn't go too well?" Chelsea asked from next to me.

I lowered my hand and shook my head, looking up at the table. "No," I nearly whispered.

Chelsea sighed and pulled her chair closer to me, taking my hand in hers. "Look, I'm not going to yell at you for snapping at me like you did because I know you were just upset by seeing Bella dressed the way she was. I think we all were a little shocked. So Nick said some things he didn't mean and you got upset, snapped at both of us and then walked away. Bella's not your responsibility, Jake. She has a mother and a father. If Ness has no problem with what she's wearing then unfortunately, you're going to have to let it go."

"You know how Ness is, Chels. I don't want Bella turning out the same way."

"Maybe so but Bella is seventeen now and it is her birthday party. She has a boyfriend and all of her friends are here. She's not a kid anymore. You can't treat her like one. This is what I was trying to tell you when we talked about your relationship with her. It's too close and I think this proves it. You still see her as this bright little kid that you need to swoop in and protect every now and then but she's anything but. She's almost an adult legally. Right now, she's old enough to drive, have a boyfriend, graduate from high school and even have as much sex as she could possibly want." I grimaced at that. "My point is that she's not exactly a woman yet but she is almost there. She's no longer a little girl. And while I'm glad she has a boyfriend, your closeness and physical intimacy would confuse her and it would no longer be innocent." My head snapped up and I glared at her. "On her part. She won't see them as innocent touches or brotherly hugs or best friends embracing or whatever else you guys used to do. You're an older guy, she trusts you implicitly, you two have a special kind of bond only you two understand, you're very attractive, you make her laugh, you protect her, you make her your first priority and make sure she knows it and then you add in the physical stuff and bam, she's gonna start thinking other things about you other than friendliness."

I sighed and hung my head. "It's not like that, Chels, and you know it. I was married to her mom. She was technically my stepdaughter. I'm ten years older than her. I don't see her that way and to be honest, I doubt she sees me that way, either. Especially, now. Trust me, Bella's smarter than that. She understands things that most kids her age would have no clue about. I've told you this. She's practically thirty in her head."

Chelsea sighed herself. "Maybe, but that just makes it even more possible. You may not want to see it but I'm telling you, the potential is there. Other people around you have seen it. Remember everything you told me? Why do you think Ness was always so jealous of you two?"

I snorted. "Because I wasn't making her number one and showering her with all of the attention. That's it."

"Ah, see? Because you weren't making her number one. Like you should make your wife if you don't have kids. Like you should make your girlfriend. Bella's not your kid. You didn't even raise her. Yes, you looked out for her and helped her out while you were there but you're not now. You and Ness are no longer married. She's moved on with her life and so have you. The only person who hasn't moved on is Bella." She sighed again. "And she needs to."

I didn't even bother mentioning just _how_ much Bella had moved on already. Besides, I had heard this whole speech already. Many times in the last three months. I was tired of it. I rubbed my forehead, exhausted. "I know." I took a deep breath and got to my feet. "Listen, I'm gonna call Sam and see what time he's gonna be here. I'll be right back, okay?"

She smiled in understanding and nodded. "Sure, baby. I'll be here. Take as much time as you need."

I smiled back at her. "Thank you." I kissed her quickly before leaving the party. I took a right and headed down the hallway, passing the bathrooms. I turned the corner and took out my phone, dialing the shop number. As it started to ring, I heard a giggle in the short distance. A giggle that sounded almost exactly like Bella's. I shut my phone and crept down the hallway. I heard the giggle again. That was definitely Bella.

I peeked around the corner and what I saw nearly drove me fucking insane. Bella and Andrew were making out, up against the wall. That wasn't what horrified me. What horrified me was seeing Andrew's hand, or actually not seeing it, underneath the hem of Bella's dress. His arm was definitely moving, slowly but still moving. Bella moaned into his mouth and then broke away, breathing harshly, eyes closed as Andrew moved to kiss her neck. She gripped the collar of his shirt tightly in her left fist, burying her face into his shoulder, letting out another quiet moan.

I don't know why but I felt like crying again rather than get pissed that Andrew was fingering Bells right in front of me. I felt like I didn't even fucking know her anymore. Had she really changed that much in three months?

Her moans started coming in rapid succession, getting a little louder with each one along with her panting. Eventually, she had to bite down on the knuckles of her right hand that was laying on his left shoulder.

"That's it, baby," I heard Andrew pant. "Come for me. That's it. You look so freakin' beautiful when you come for me." His head snapped up and he watched her as he started to move his arm faster. "Yes, baby, that's it." Her eyes slowly opened and her face was all flushed. As much as I hated what I was seeing, I had to agree. She was fucking beautiful. He started to kiss her, swallowing most of her moans. He then whispered to her lips, "I love you, Bella. I love you so much." And the sad part? I knew what he was saying was real. It was all over his face as he stared at her. He was completely enamored with her.

"Andrew," she moaned. "Love you...too," Bella panted out before grabbing him with both hands and smashing her lips onto his. I couldn't take anymore. I walked away, feeling sick to my stomach. I made it down the hall a little ways before I slid down the wall and placed my elbows on my knees, holding my head in my hands. I could still hear them surprisingly but I couldn't move. I felt numb to everything except the sickening feeling spreading throughout not only my body but my soul. My heart ached in my chest. If this was how Bella felt all the times she'd heard me have sex, especially the last one being with Chelsea, then I definitely deserved the dose of my own medicine I was getting right now.

I heard Bella reach orgasm and maybe if it wasn't her, I might have been turned on by the sounds she made. But, it was Bella and there was no arousal coming from this. Nope, only nausea. I then heard them kissing loudly and Bella letting out a few breathy laughs. I heard Andrew jokingly tell her that that was only half of her present, making her chuckle. And then I heard her telling him it was only half of his, too, and that he would get his later tonight when they were alone. Then there was more kissing. I shut my eyes, trying to keep the tears that were burning at the corners of my eyes from being able to spill. What the fuck had happened these past three months? Had she really been that lost without me and then because she had started seeing this fucker before I saw her for the last time, he had turned her into this? My Bells was innocent yet wise and absolutely not naive. How could she just let some asshole finger her in a goddamn hallway of a swanky catering restaurant?

I barely heard the giggles and then the steps approaching me, turning the corner or them stop suddenly along with any other sound. "Are you okay?" Bella, not Bells, asked coldly. That was just the straw that broke the camel's back. I opened my eyes and got to my feet, ignoring them, and went back to the party, not looking back once.

...

**BPOV**

I watched Jake slowly walk away and I longed to run after him, pull him into a hug, kiss his cheek, run my fingers through his hair like he loved, something. But, I couldn't. I had a statement to make and I had made it. He got the message loud and clear finally. Though I was horrified at being overheard as Andrew touched me, especially by Jake, I didn't regret at deciding to move forward with the former tonight. I had been nuts to think I'd save myself for the latter. He'd never want me, never see me as anything other than his little Bells. And after I had unloaded on him earlier, all of the anger and hurt came rushing back, reminding me of why I couldn't trust him now.

"Shit. Do you think he heard us?" Andrew asked.

I shrugged. "Don't really know and don't really care." I smiled and kissed him. "It's our business, not his. Now, come on. For the first time in my life, I feel like dancing." I winked at him and he laughed, putting his arm around me and pulling me in for a kiss before leading us back to the party.

...

**JPOV**

I walked back into the party and headed straight for the bar. I ordered a beer and pulled out a chair at some random table, sitting down. I couldn't go back to our table now. I couldn't talk to Chelsea right now or deal with Nick checking Bella out or even look in Bella's direction. I needed to get my bearing back first.

I was angry. Very hurt and angry. I didn't like this Bella she'd become at all. This one was a cold hearted bitch and was obviously trying to become her mom, at least in the sexual department. I'm surprised she just didn't fuck him right there in the hallway. Hadn't she said they'd already gone at it? Why the wait until tonight?

I scowled when I saw Bella come back into the party with Andrew who had his arm around her. Bella grinned when a couple of girls approached her, talking to her about something. Andrew rolled his eyes and Bella saw, laughing. She pulled him to her for a kiss and said something. He then smiled at her, kissed her one more time and walked off towards his friends. Bella stayed there, nodding and listening to the girls, laughing every once in a while and talking herself. I studied her as I watched her.

Bella was beautiful, there was no doubt about that. As much as I despised that excuse of a dress, I had to admit, she looked really good. The dress accentuated her legs which turned out to be one of her best assets. The outfit showed she had all the right curves of the beginning of a woman's body. Her hair was down in large soft curls, almost like a girl would wear to a wedding or a prom or something. She had make-up on and the eyeliner made her eyes pop. Her smile was gorgeous and when she laughed a genuine laugh, I didn't think there was any other girl in this room that looked as amazing as she did when she laughed, Chelsea included.

Chels had been right. Bella was no longer a kid. Right now, I was looking at a beautiful young woman. Perhaps the most beautiful I'd seen in some time. Don't get me wrong, I was crazy about Chels and she had an amazing body as well as being pretty but right now, in this moment, she had nothing on Bella. And the most ironic thing is that Bella didn't even realize how gorgeous she was. That made her all the more beautiful.

The serving staff started to place food on the tables so I retreated back to my rightful place. Chelsea smiled at me as I sat down. I honestly didn't even have the energy to smile back. I just sighed tiredly and leaned over, kissing her cheek. She smiled wider and went back to talking to Nick. I took a sip of my beer, my eyes immediately finding Bella again. She had laid a hand on one of the girl's shoulder, saying something, smiling and walking towards our table. I kept my eyes glued to my plate, waiting for our dinner or salads or whatever it was to be served.

I saw her take her seat across from us out of the corner of my eye, making sure to look anywhere but in my direction. I snorted quietly and took another sip of my beer. Yep, if I realized someone heard me fucking around, I'd be uneasy, too. Andrew joined her a second later, kissing her before he sat down. She smiled warmly at him and he lifted her hand, kissing it. I shook my head and sighed quietly. I just had to get through this sit down dinner. I didn't have to stay for the dancing, gifts or even the cake. But to leave before dinner after Ness had already paid for it would just be rude. So, I would wait until the plates were cleared and make my excuses and leave. If I didn't happen to say goodbye to Bella on the way out, oh well.

Soon, everyone else joined us and then our food was served. I kept my eyes down the entire time unless someone else was speaking, but as soon as it was Bella or that fucker, I focused on my food.

Ness had finished and was leaning her elbows on the table, her hands clasped in front of her mouth, smiling. There was a break in conversation and apparently she chose right then to speak. "You know, I must say, Bella, I'm quite proud of you." We all froze and looked up at her. It was no secret to anyone at this table that she was never complimentary of Bella.

Bella's brows furrowed as she put down her glass, not looking embarrassed whatsoever like she would when the attention was on her. Just another thing Bella had taken away from my Bells. I hated it. "How so?"

"Well, you're seventeen now, a young woman. You have a wonderful young man who loves and adores you." Andrew smiled at Bella and she returned it, winking at him. Ugh. "You've made so much progress in the last three months ever since you-"

"Mom," Bella interrupted. "No need to go into that," she chuckled uneasily. "Thank you, though." She smiled warmly at her mother. "It means a lot to me that you said that."

Ness grinned. "How could I not? I mean, you've got a portfolio and that ad coming out, not to mention the singl-"

"Mom!" Bella turned red now and everyone's mouths were agape. "I love you but if you keep talking, I'm afraid I'll have to kill you and mess up this incredible dress. And I'll get Andrew to help me hide the body." Andrew chuckled but also looked curious. So, the incredible Andrew had been kept in the dark with the rest of us, huh? Guess he wasn't Bella's white knight in shining armor after all. Not one that knew every part of her anyway. I scowled. And it better be kept that way.

"A portfolio?" Chelsea asked.

"An ad?" Jess asked excitedly.

Bella smiled unhappily and took a sip of her water, not looking at anyone.

"Bella, you should be proud of your accomplishments. I am. Bella has a portfolio of professional p-"

"Okay," Bella cut her off, getting to her feet. "Obviously, I can't make it across the table fast enough to duct tape your mouth shut and the threats aren't working," A couple of people laughed. "So I think it's time I went and talked to my guests."

Ness sighed and said something in what sounded like French. My jaw dropped. I didn't know Ness knew French or any other foreign language. I had never heard her speak it before.

And more surprisingly, Bella answered her in perfect French. I stared at her with wide eyes. Who the fuck was this Bella? She had never known another foreign language other than the Spanish she was forced to take in school and she only knew a little bit, if that.

It was obvious that Bella was not happy. I along with everyone else didn't need to understand what she was saying; it was pretty clear. Bella finished her little foreign tirade with a huge irritated sigh.

Ness shrugged. She then spoke something else and gestured towards Bella with her hand. Bella rolled her eyes, said something else, kissed the top of Andrew's head and then walked away, glaring back at her mother before turning to stop at a table.

I looked back at Ness in shock as everyone else did. "Since when did Bella learn to speak French?" Chels asked, seemingly echoing everyone's thoughts.

Ness sipped at her wine. "Since she was in Paris."

I lowered my fork and sat back in my chair, still in shock. "Ness, Bella's never been to Paris."

Ness then glared over at me, scoffing. "Yes, well, I keep forgetting that you had other things to do other than remain in Bella's life as you promised her upon moving out. I warned her you wouldn't keep it, like a typical man, but she still believed you would. It would seem I was correct, wasn't I?" Everyone looked down at their plates uncomfortably except Ness, Chelsea and myself.

I glared right back at her, not letting her see how guilty I felt. "Well, Ness," I picked up my beer. "Not too much has changed in my absence. You're still a bitch."

She went to speak when Chelsea cut her off. "Forgive me for saying this but Bella is not Jake's responsibility. He's not her father, her brother, her uncle, her cousin or any other blood relation. He didn't raise her. Why the hell should he have to be made to feel guilty for living his life? Why the hell would you put that kind of expectation on him? Either of you? It's ridiculous!"

Ness was furious and this wasn't going to be good. Shit. I should have known that would rile Chelsea up. "Chels," I shook my head at her when she looked over at me. "Look, Ness is right. Bella's important to me, you know that. I made her a promise and I didn't live up to it. That's it. It doesn't matter if I had an obligation to be there or not, I told Bella I would be. And I wasn't. It was my fault. Ness is just speaking the truth. Let it go."

Chelsea glared at me and I knew I was in for it later. Her lips formed into a tight thin line. "Fine," she said through gritted teeth. "I still say it's ridiculous but whatever. If only all of your ex-girlfriends were so lucky to have their children be completely dependent on you as well."

Ness went to snap at her but I beat her to it. "Chels. Enough. Come on," I said softly. "Let it go."

She scoffed, shaking her head and went back to eating her food. "Whatever." Yep, I was definitely in for it later.

I sighed quietly. Great. Just another thing to add to the list to make my life a living hell tonight. "Ness, when was Bella in Paris?"

She smiled proudly. "This past summer. Her father took her there for a month to get away for a while."

My brows furrowed. "Get away? From what? Here?"

Ness scoffed at me. "That's right. I forgot you didn't know. Well, everyone else here knows except you and your paramour I imagine. Bella had a slight accident before school let out." A quick glance at Jess and Lindsey confirmed this as they looked sadly at Ness. Sean glanced towards Andrew and the latter frowned worriedly and stared down at his plate. Shit. What the hell had happened? Even Chelsea was looking Ness' way, wanting to know what she was talking about.

"A slight accident?"

Ness sighed sadly. "It's not something she likes talking about for obvious reasons. Sam is the only one who knows about it and I'd like to keep it that way."

I did a double take. "Wait, Sam knew? And he didn't tell me?"

Ness shrugged. "Bella asked him not to, I imagine, and he gave her his word. And _he_ kept his." She glared at me pointedly. Chelsea's face reddened in anger and I just sighed tiredly.

"Ness, just tell me what happened please. You've got me worried right now. What happened to Bella?"

Andrew got up and we all turned to look at him. "Excuse me but I'm heading to the restroom. I'll be right back." He walked away, looking upset. I turned back to Ness, brows arched questioningly.

"It's very hard for him to talk about that night," Jess answered quietly. "He was the one that found her. They had just started dating a couple of weeks before that." Sean got up, sighing, and laid his hand on Jess' shoulder. "I'm gonna go see if he's okay," he murmured. She nodded and kissed him before he left.

"Found her? What the fuck are you not telling me, Ness?"

"Bella was going into a bit of a downward spiral right before it happened. I don't know how it happened. I mean, Jake, you know Bella, she feels down sometimes but nothing to this extent. I knew she had started seeing Andrew and I had hoped that would perk her up. He's always been so good to her and he absolutely adores her." I could see Ness' eyes getting glassy and I knew this wasn't good. My heart was pounding and I could feel my stomach in my throat practically. "It did help but unfortunately, it only prolonged the inevitable. Bella started going to parties and drinking quite heavily. This started before Andrew started to date her. I had no idea it was going on until one night, Jess and Lindsey here," Both girls stared down at their plates uncomfortably. "Brought Bella home late one night, completely intoxicated. After I sobered her up, I did my usual, I grounded her and told her if she didn't clean up her act, there would be worse consequences. She promised me it would never happen again. Unfortunately, it did. There were nights she didn't come home and I would have to call one of the girls here to find out if she was with them or Andrew. Usually, one of them had taken her to their houses to sleep it off and go home the next morning. She started missing classes and then eventually, whole days of school. She spent half her time hung over and the other half drunk."

"Why didn't you fucking call me? Or why didn't Bella for Christ's sake?" I nearly yelled.

Ness glared over at me. "She did. You never called her back." I felt like she had stabbed me in the chest with that information. She didn't let me reel too long, though. "I spoke with her father countless times on the phone as well as her grandfather and Alice, trying to decide what was the best route to take. Bella was getting alcohol from somewhere and other than locking her up in the house twenty four seven, I couldn't stop her."

"Call the police!" Chelsea raged. "Or put her into a rehab program!"

"Oh, yes, sound advice coming from someone who isn't even a mother but also happens to be partially responsible for the pain my daughter suffered!" Ness hissed.

"Me? How the hell am I responsible for Bella going off the deep end?" Chelsea was losing her temper now.

"Shut up! Both of you! Ness, enough with the cracks. What the fuck happened?" Chelsea glared at me but I didn't care. I needed to know what the hell had happened.

"Well, regardless of what some might think," Ness scowled in Chelsea's direction. "I had no wish to put my daughter in jail or into a rehab facility unless I had no other choice. Her father and my father agreed with me. We all tried to talk to her. I tried severe consequences but still it didn't work. I threatened to throw her out but she just laughed at me and said I'd probably be doing her a favor. She was angry all the time, more sarcastic than normal. She never cried in front of me. But she did in front of the girls and apparently to her father."

"So again," I growled. "Why didn't _you_ call me?" I was gonna kick the shit out of Sam for keeping this from me.

"I was going to," Ness snapped. "And I told Edward as much. He said that based on a conversation she had had with Esme, that it wouldn't do any good. It would probably only make her worse if I involved you."

"How the fuck would it have made it worse? I would've talked to her, begged her to stop. I would've locked her up in my apartment until she dried out and taken her to some special counseling or something. I would have helped her!"

"She didn't want your help. At least that was what she told Esme. Apparently, you," She pointed right at me. "Were part of the reason as to why she was going down this path. Bella never told me but Esme mentioned something about chicken soup." My heart stopped. "I never knew what that meant but Esme said that was all Edward and I needed to know. That Bella had spoken to her in confidence. You know, I used to hate that woman so much but after how she helped Bella, I have to say, I approve."

"Chicken soup?" Chelsea asked, looking at me. "What the hell does that mean?" I didn't say anything. I just sat there in shock. "Jake? What's chicken soup?" I couldn't speak; I could barely breathe. I had hurt her so badly that day.

"Anyway," Ness continued, completely ignoring Chels. "This all happened within a matter of a few weeks if you can believe that. It started in the end of May, right after Memorial Day weekend. Unfortunately, right before school was to let out, Bella did something I would have never thought she would ever do." She took a deep breath, obviously trying to prepare herself for this next part. "One night, she was at a party that some senior was having at his house, some graduation party or something. There were no parents around, obviously, and alcohol was being served. Andrew had taken her there. He-"

"If he knew Bella had a problem, then what the fuck was he doing taking her there?" I hissed.

"Andrew took her there to keep an eye on her. Just as the girls did from time to time. It was either that or Bella would find her own way to that party and then try to get home on her own and possibly end up doing something even worse. He didn't take her there because he didn't care about her, Jacob. He took her there because he wanted to watch out for her. Bella was going to go no matter what."

"Are you telling me that Bella was so damn strong and intimidating that not one of you took her elsewhere to keep her occupied or forced her to stay home? That her boyfriend couldn't have taken her to a movie instead? Or her friends to the mall?" Chelsea asked in disgust.

"Hey," Lindsey snapped, all of us looking at her in shock. "You weren't there, okay? Bella was out of control. We all dealt with it, not you. Or you." She turned a glare on me. Whoa. I had never seen Lindsey raise her voice above a whisper practically. "We all did. We all cared about Bella. You two were too busy humping each other to give a damn! Don't sit there and judge the people who were there! You weren't!"

"Excuse me!" Chelsea was about to start.

"Yeah, that's right! Bella heard you two going at it when she went to make sure Jake was okay when he lied to her about being sick and couldn't see her! All to screw you! That's what the fucking chicken soup reference is about! That's why Bella didn't call Jake! Because you kept him from her!" Lindsey's face was red. Jess was had her arm around her shoulders, telling her to calm down.

"That's it! I don't have to take this shit! Some little high school bitch like you is going to sit there and talk about me like I'm some fucking whore? It's not my fault she was being nosy and walked in where she didn't belong, overhearing us! It's not my fault she took it so hard because she thought she was it in Jake's life! That's on her! Not me! And I certainly never kept him from her! He was free to see her at anytime he wanted!" Okay, now that was bullshit.

I could see Lindsey getting riled up. But Ness spoke next, directing her anger towards me. "That's what the chicken soup reference was about? You lied to Bella so you could get laid?"

"Fuck you, bitch! Stop making your kid so goddamn dependent on the guys you screw!" Chelsea yelled.

We were all getting loud and the other tables were starting to look over. Even Bella, with her brows furrowed, was looking our way, probably wondering what was going on. Okay, I'd had enough.

"That's it!" I snapped. "All of you shut the fuck up! Chels, chill out. You and I both know why that night happened the way it did so don't say another fucking word. Lindz, I get you're pissed and protecting your friend but direct your anger at me, not my girlfriend. Ness, you can ream me out later. Now, tell me what the fuck happened! And do it quietly, everyone's looking at us and even Bella is wondering what the fuck is going on! Before she comes over here, fucking tell me already!"

Everyone was silent. Chelsea sat back in her chair, scowling with arms crossed. Nick excused himself to make a quick call to a friend outside. Lindsey glared at me but didn't say another word. Jess kept rubbing Lindsey's shoulder soothingly but glued her eyes to their plates. Ness also glared at me but sighed. "Fine. But yes, you are definitely going to hear from me later on this. You're obviously to blame partially. So, yes, we will be discussing this later," she hissed.

Chelsea opened her mouth to retort when I slapped the table, loud enough for them to listen up but not for everyone else to hear. "Chels! Enough! Let her talk!"

Chelsea gave me such a glare that had it been any other time, I might have tried to placate her. Because that glare promised retribution later. Oh well.

Ness cleared her throat, glaring in Chelsea's direction. "Anyway," She then turned the glare onto me. "That night, Andrew stayed by her side. When he went to the bathroom quickly, he asked a friend of his to watch out for her until he got back. Unfortunately, the friend didn't and Bella somehow got so much alcohol on her hands, she was drunk by the time Andrew returned. She said she felt sick so Andrew helped her to the bathroom. She asked him to get her some water and there were no containers in the bathroom he could use so he ran to the kitchen, grabbed a cup, ran back only to find she had locked the door on him. He kept pounding on it, telling her to open up. He called her cell phone over and over and kept trying the lock. He tried for a good ten minutes but he was so scared she passed out, he started banging into the door. Some boy asked him what he was doing and he told him and the boy helped him break through the door only to find Bella on the floor." Ness took in a ragged breath. "Andrew found a few different prescription bottles as well as all different over the counter medication containers empty on the floor next to her. She had taken them all. Andrew called 911 and kept begging her to wake up, trying everything he could think of. He did everything the operator told him to but still, she was unconscious. The ambulance came and rushed her to the hospital. There, they pumped her stomach and said with some of the prescription drugs she took and the amounts, if Andrew hadn't broken down the door, Bella wouldn't have made it." A tear slipped down her cheek and she quickly wiped it away.

I dropped my head into my hands, doing my best not to cry. I had to keep reminding myself that Bella was here now, safe and sober. Or else I would just break down in front of the whole room.

"Edward and Esme flew here immediately and we all talked, deciding that time in a mental ward of the hospital was not what Bella needed. She needed a distraction, something to occupy her mind and get away from everything familiar for a while, no places or people that would trigger memories of whatever it was that she was trying to numb herself to, whatever was causing her pain. As furious as I am at you, Jacob, this was not all because of what happened with you and that disgusting spectacle she witnessed. There were other things, too. She wouldn't tell me and she wouldn't tell Edward. The only person she let in during that time was Esme. And Andrew. She didn't tell him everything like she told Esme but he was the only one she was willing to listen to. She felt very guilty for what she had done and that he had had to witness it. She knew she had a choice to make and so she chose to go with Edward and Esme to Paris for the majority of the summer. There she started to make some real progress. Edward wanted to nurture her creativity, to help her experience all life had to offer. He talked her into getting some professional photos taken and he booked her a photoshoot and an advertisement for perfume over there. Don't ask me the name, though. She recorded a single, a cover of some song she chose. Edward had gotten her a voice coach and she worked so hard and the single, it is so beautiful. Do you know that you can actually buy it on iTunes? I have no idea how Edward was able to swing it, but he did. He, Esme and I were agreed on one thing only: Bella was our main priority and we'd do whatever it took to make sure she never tried anything like that ever again. To show her that life is never _that_ bad, no matter how much it hurts. We put all of our squabbles aside for her sake and decided to leave the past in the past. The only thing that mattered was the future, Bella's future. So, I took a week off from work during the summer and I traveled out there to visit with them. I brought along Nick and Andrew as well as Jessica and Lindsey so they could see how well she was doing. She was very happy to see all of us. By the time we got there, she was speaking French almost fluently by then. Edward and Esme had been teaching her as well as her being in the city and dealing with merchants and the like." I looked over at Ness and she was staring off into space, smiling warmly.

"I wish you could have seen her. She was absolutely radiant. I don't think I've ever seen her that happy. I think the only time she ever came close is when she was with you, Jacob. But...she was shining and I had never been more proud of her. She took us to see the Eiffel Tower and to her favorite cafe and bookstore." She chuckled. "Leave it to Bella to find a bookstore even in a foreign country she's never been to before. Edward told me she had done a fashion show a few days prior and he showed us all the tape he had made, with Bella turning red and covering her eyes, begging him to turn it off of course." She laughed and shook her head. "She looked magnificent. And apparently, though she wasn't model material as she put it, the designer loved her. He helped her along with Edward, kind of took her under his wing if you will. He was a very busy man but he always made time for Bella to come and visit him. I don't know how, but Bella just does that to people." She smiled proudly. "Anyway, he took her shopping along with Esme and for once, she actually enjoyed it. She bought a whole new wardrobe, got new books of course but some in French which she can now read, write and speak fluently. She picked it up so fast; she's such a smart girl. Edward, Esme and Philip made sure she experienced Paris to the fullest. She showed us everything, was so excited. She took the girls shopping and went out with Andrew on a date. She spent a lot of time with him as well as us. She didn't come back until right after the beginning of August but it did her so much good. She came back happier and more alive than I've ever seen her. She and Andrew picked up right where they left off. Bella will have to make up all of the extra school work as she goes along into this new year but she's determined to do it. She wants to go to school and she might choose one in Paris. Philip offered to put in a good word for her. Bella is so brilliant, she taught me how to speak French. I'm not as good as her but she started that week we were there and then continued once she came home. Her father bought her very first car for her and she and I redecorated her bedroom as well as some areas in the house. She and I became a lot closer once we discussed some things. Bella and I have both been in counseling since she returned. The therapist thought it a good idea to have a party for her, help her to celebrate her birthday since she never really wanted to before." She smiled. "Philip sent her these two beautiful pieces he had done along with the most beautiful roses you've ever seen. She was so excited when she called him to thank him. He even told her he might be coming to the city for business and if he does, he wants her to come and see him. He even offered to help her pick up her modeling career if she wanted to continue."

Chelsea scoffed. "It must be nice to have money," she muttered as she sipped her drink.

I wanted to fucking scream at her. I understood this wasn't the norm but did she not hear the part where Bella tried to fucking kill herself?

"Bella's father, stepmother and I worked very hard to make the money we do. Edward has built his company from the ground up. Esme and I have both busted our asses to get to where we are today in the companies we work for. If we want to spend it on Bella, we will do so. She never asks for anything. Anything! So don't you dare sit there and act as if we're some rich snobs who inherited our daddies' money. We worked for it!" Ness hissed.

Chelsea went to respond when I put a hand on her arm. "Stop," I whispered. She glared up at me, but sat back, shaking her head, not saying a word.

"Edward is CEO of his company. I land million dollar accounts at my advertising agency every day. And Esme is one of the most respected publishers on the eastern seaboard!" Then she had a thought. "Oh, that reminds me. Bella is also working on a book. She has already released two e-books and while they aren't best sellers obviously or you would've heard of them, she's done pretty well for herself. And she makes her _own_ money now!"

Chelsea scoffed again. "Yeah, that you guys helped her to get. She wouldn't be hearing from ol' Philip or receiving free fashion pieces or selling ebooks or music singles without any of your help."

Ness looked like she was ready to burst but I spoke. "Chels, I don't give a shit about any of that. Bella tried to kill herself and that's what concerns me. If you love me like you say you do, that should concern you, too." She glanced up at me and I glared at her. Her jaw tightened and she focused her gaze back onto her plate, not saying a word.

"Ness, if Bella has her own car why did she ask me to drive her here then?"

Ness cocked her head as if trying to ascertain whether I was being serious or not. "Isn't it obvious? Because she wanted to spend some time with you. However, that doesn't appear to have happened now, has it?" She scoffed and got to her feet. "Anyway, that's how her summer's been and I am immensely proud of my daughter for all of the progress she has made, with and without help." She glared in Chelsea's direction. "I would remind you all that this is Bella's birthday party. If anything, and I do mean anything, is said or done to her to make her upset, trust me when I say you will answer to me and I will make a trip in Hell look like a tropical vacation with what I will do to you. Don't think I can? Try me. Screw with my daughter and you screw with me." She purposely kept her eyes on Chelsea but the latter just shook her head, refusing to look up. "Oh and Jacob, you and I will be discussing this later. I want Bella to enjoy her party, not to be miserable during it or be upset. Not a word until you and I have spoken. Do we understand one another?" Normally, I would have been sarcastic or rolled my eyes or gotten pissed but this time, I had no problem with it. Bella was top priority, I got it. I nodded. "Good. I will determine whether I think you would be beneficial to Bella's life from here on out and if you will still be allowed to see her should you so choose. If not, you will be legally prevented from seeing her or contacting her. You know I can do it and I will if I have to in order to keep Bella from getting hurt again. I will not allow my daughter to feel any pain you cause her again. I hope I'm making myself clear. If you really care about her like you say, then I'm sure you'll agree, she's the main concern, not our failed marriage or your new...relationship," she said dripping with disgust. "It's strictly about Bella and we need to put our disagreements aside in the interest of making sure she's safe and happy. So, I will speak with you afterwards. Don't go anywhere unless you choose to drop your date off at home and come meet me at the house to discuss things. It's up to you. And trust me when I say, as bad as you think I am, you'd much rather be dealing with me than Edward. Even though Esme never told him what Bella confided to her, one thing was clear: some of her pain had been directly or indirectly caused by you. He was livid and ready to come after you in any way he could, but Esme and I talked him out of it, telling him that Bella would be upset if he did. So, like I said, should you choose to remain in Bella's life, you'll heed what I'm telling you." In shock, I just nodded. "Now, I should go make arrangements for the gift opening soon. Girls, would you mind assisting me?" Jess nodded and she and Lindsey both got to their feet, following her without a word. Lindsey made sure to glare at Chelsea and I as she did.

I didn't think I would ever get my head to stop spinning. I felt like I had just entered the fucking Twilight Zone. What the hell?

"Hey," Chelsea and I both looked up to see Bella smiling uncomfortably at us, her brows still furrowed. "Everything okay here? Everyone's gone."

I nodded. "Yeah. Uh, Andrew went to the bathroom I think and uh, the girls are helping your mom. Nick had a call to make so..."

"Oh. Um, okay. Well then, they should be back soon then." She sat down and glanced around nervously, looking for Andrew's return presumably.

"I'm going to get a drink. Or three." Chelsea got up and walked away without looking at either of us.

Bella watched her go worriedly. "Are you sure everything's okay? I mean, with the others? You guys seemed pretty intense over here before. Mom didn't start anything, did she?"

I cleared my throat, shaking my head. "No. I mean, yeah she and Chels got into a little argument but it's nothing more than the norm. They'll get over it."

Bella nodded. She placed her elbows on the table and clasped her hands in front of her mouth, staring at me as I stared back at her. "Listen, Jake, about what I said before-"

I held up a hand, shaking my head again slightly. "No need. I get it. It's not like you were wrong."

Her eyes narrowed, scrutinizing me. "Okay. Something did happen. More than what you're saying. What happened? Seriously." She looked worried and I hated it. I got up and sat next to her slowly, leaning forward to face her. "Why didn't you tell me that you were there that day? When I was..." I swallowed thickly. "Occupied."

She looked uncomfortable but she met my eyes and never once looked away or blushed. She definitely had changed over the summer. "I didn't see the need. I obviously walked in on something private going on between you two. So, I just turned around and left. I walked home. It was over and done with. I didn't feel it was something I needed to talk to you about."

I sighed sadly and took her hand in mine. "Well, I wish you would've. I'm sorry it happened." I pulled her hand up to my lips and kissed it tenderly, lingering there for a minute, before looking up at her again. Her eyes were a little glassy but otherwise, she kept whatever she was feeling hidden well. Another change. "Bells, I feel like such a fucking idiot. No, worse. Your mom was telling me some of the things you'd done, like photos, music-"

She pulled her hand away, this time looking irritated. "Yeah, well, I wish she hadn't." She turned to face the table and took a sip of her water.

"Why?"

She shrugged without looking at me. "Because it's not something worth talking about."

My brows furrowed. "Yes, it is. You spent your summer in Paris, I mean, that's pretty incredible right there. I'm surprised Sam never told me you were out of the country," I chuckled nervously.

She shrugged again, this time looking at her nails. "It must not have come up in conversation."

She was stonewalling me, great. Well, it's not like I could blame her. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "Yeah, well, I wish it had. Sam's gonna get a swift kick in the ass for that one."

She shook her head, smirking. "Is that your answer to every problem? Just kick some guy's ass and poof, it's all good?"

I smirked at her. "Yeah. It usually works pretty well. I've had about a ninety nine point nine percent success rate."

She turned, smirking wider at me. "Really? And what about the point one percent?"

I took her hand in mine again, intertwining our fingers and holding it in my lap. "I beg for forgiveness and hope to hell it works because I can't imagine not having that person around." She didn't say anything so I continued. "I have to talk to your mom about some things after this is over but I would really like it if I could come see you at the house and talk like we used to. There's so much I want to talk to you about."

She bit her lip and looked away. "I would like to but I'm afraid I've already made plans. Maybe another night."

Not only did I feel like my heart dropped into my stomach, I got angry knowing exactly what plans she was referring to. I scoffed angrily. "Yeah, I remember," I muttered, looking towards the table next to us.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Bella's head snap in my direction, her eyes narrowed. "Well, now I know why you looked so devastated and sick in the hall when we saw you. I'm surprised you didn't come around the corner and give him a swift kick in the ass, too. Or me. What? Enjoy what you heard? What you saw?"

I glanced at her, my eyes narrowing as well. The look in her eyes was slicing right through me. Something told me I had to be very careful answering this. This wasn't my Bells talking to me right now. She wouldn't be so forgiving if I said the wrong thing. "No."

Bella removed her hand from mine and rested her chin in her hand, watching me. "Really? And why is that, Jake?"

I don't know why, I know it was a sick thought, but for some reason, my instincts told me that what I had witnessed earlier had been part of some form of punishment. "Your point was made."

"Point?" She asked innocently. "What point?"

I gave her a look. She was just messing with me now. "That it wasn't any fun on hearing you having sex with someone else."

"Hmm." She lowered her hand. "Well, actually, one, Andrew and I weren't having sex, not the fun kind anyway and two, why was it no fun hearing me specifically reacting to sexual stimulation? Most men would either enjoy it, want to participate or just walk away. You didn't do any of the three."

I grimaced and looked down. "Why are you doing this, Bells?"

"Answer the question," she snapped.

I glared up at her. "Because I didn't want him touching you like that. I don't want any guy touching you like that."

"And again, why?"

"What do you mean why? Because I care about you and I don't want some guy with his hands all over you or inside you for that matter. I mean, Jesus Christ, Bells, do you want me to be happy about it? Rate it? Give you a performance review? I mean, what? What do you want?"

She didn't appear to be flustered by my reaction. "But again, why? If it's something I'm enjoying which you clearly saw and heard that I was, then why would you be as upset as you were after witnessing it? I'm not your sister and I'm certainly not your daughter. We're not even related. You didn't raise. So, again, why?"

I scoffed, shaking my head. "Because I don't want him touching you!"

She sighed and took another sip of her water, not looking at me.

"What? Is that not a good enough reason? Not the answer you were looking for? Upset I didn't join you two? Or sit there and clap? I mean, what? Tell me! What the fuck do you want from me?" I was getting pissed. This wasn't my Bella. No blush whatsoever, talking about me seeing her having sex or being sexual, whatever you want to say, and not being embarrassed about it? Her giving me this mindfuck or head game or whatever? It wasn't her.

She turned to look at me. "Okay, it's obvious you're not going to give me the real answer. I don't know if that's deliberate on your part or not so let's try this another way. What did you feel when you saw it? What made you slump to the floor like that?"

I sighed angrily. "I was sick about it."

"And?"

I wiped my hand down my face tiredly. "I don't know. I was nauseous, upset, wanting to cry, angry, hurt, confused, felt like I was going nuts maybe, was hoping it was a hallucination or some sick dream, denial, I don't know. Is that enough Dr. Freud or should I keep going?"

She shrugged. "Would you say devastated is an accurate word, depicting all of those feelings in a lump sum?"

"Okay, I can see you've been hanging out with your dad recently and not just 'cause Ness told me. Yeah. Devastated. There you go. Now, are we done talking about this? Because I really don't want to get into details. You're seventeen, you can do what you want, I get it. I'd rather just forget I saw the whole thing, if you don't mind."

She leaned forward and for some reason I was reminded of a lion or a tiger, a tiger definitely (I had always called her that) moving forward slowly towards their prey before attacking. Her hands were on both of my legs as she leaned forward and I swear I stopped breathing for a second. I almost felt like she was some other woman, being extremely forward and coming onto me. Why else would her hands be on my thighs and I could almost see down her dress from the angle she made sure to position herself in? I wanted to look away but I knew it would make her even angrier with me and I didn't want that. She slithered up (there's no other way to describe the movement she made) and whispered in my ear. "It hurts listening to the person you find yourself in love with having sex with someone else, doesn't it?"

I jerked my head back. "What? You think that I am in lo-"

She got up, smiling wanly. "I wasn't talking about you." She patted my shoulder sympathetically and then left to go talk to her mom.

I watched her go, frozen in shock. What the hell did she just say?


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Quick recap: this is Bella's seventeenth birthday party. In NYS, seventeen is the legal age of consent and NYS is where this is taking place. While Jake is almost ten years older than her, with Bella's previous life experiences the two of them meet somewhere in the middle with maturity. ****I'm not promoting and/or condoning any inappropriate and/or questionable themes that come up in this story. I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**************I know the end of this chapter might be a bit tough and hang in there. Things aren't always what they seem. ;-)**

**Thank you for all of your feedback. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**BPOV**

Yep. Let him sit on that for a while. The lying bastard. How the hell was I still in love with him? How could I be in love with someone who so willingly hurt me? Andrew was the one I should be in love with. Andrew was the one I would give myself to tonight. I had to get Jake out of my mind and heart for good. One of the things I had learned over the summer is if something is blackening your soul, dragging you down, and is completely bad for you, no matter how much you love it, you have to let it go or it will succeed.

So, I would force myself to do what my heart hadn't already done for me.

I approached Mom as she spoke to the DJ. She saw me coming and finished up her conversation quickly and met me halfway. "He's going to start playing the songs you requested shortly. How are you enjoying yourself so far?"

I shrugged and wrapped my arm around her shoulders. Mom and I had actually come pretty far in the last three months. She was actually now someone I trusted and looked to for help if I needed it. "It's nice. Everything's really pretty and I'm having a lot of fun actually. I'm actually glad you insisted we do this. I'm enjoying myself." Even if it's only to fuck Jake up as badly as he had done to me. I gave her a warm smile and she gave me a hug.

"I'm glad, sweetie. It's a shame your father and Esme couldn't be here. I wish they could have made it."

"That's okay. I'll be seeing them next weekend. It'll be nice to spend some time back in Massachucetts even if for only a couple of days."

She pulled back, smiling. "I bet."

"But I do have to ask you something?"

Her brows furrowed. "Sure. What is it?"

"What was going on at our table before? It seemed like you all were arguing. Jake said you and Chelsea just had a little tiff but that it wasn't anything major. But she made some kind of remark and went to the bar, leaving Jake and I alone at the table."

Mom frowned. "Oh, really? And what did she say exactly?"

"Nothing worth worrying about. She said she was going to get a drink or three and then left. But, I don't know, she seemed very...I don't know, pissed off. Is everything really okay like Jake said?"

Mom sighed. "Don't be mad at me, Bella, but I told Jacob and that little slut exactly how I felt about her keeping him from you and for him going along with it."

"Why?" I asked, truly curious.

"Because it's obvious he hurt you and by the way, I now know what the chicken soup reference is now. Lindsey let it slip by accident. She was defending you to Chelsea so don't be angry with her. I will be speaking to Jacob later about that, by the way. But, that woman he's dating is just so...abhorrent."

She watched me nervously but I just laughed. "I couldn't agree more. Well, then I guess a thank you is in order, to you and to Lindsey. So thank you." I hugged her. No, I didn't want anyone to fight but to hear my mom talk about speaking her mind to the one person I blamed for taking my Jake away, then I was willing to look the other way if need be.

...

**JPOV**

Okay, I needed to talk to Bella. Alone. This couldn't wait. I had to know what she meant by that last remark. I mean, I had a pretty good idea but I wanted to hear her say it out loud. I couldn't take anymore of this. It was killing me, knowing what had happened to her and I hadn't been there. And even worse, she hadn't wanted me there.

I waited until I saw Bella leave her mom and go out the door. Then I jumped up and made my way out after her. Chelsea hadn't come back since she left to go to the bar and to be quite honest, at this point, I didn't care. I was still pretty pissed at her for earlier and I couldn't be sure that I wouldn't blow up at her when she came back to the table. So, it was better she stayed away for now.

I saw Bella headed to the Girls' Bathroom but was stopped by another girl. She was talking to Bella about something, they both laughed and Bella told her she'd see her inside and walked away. I let the girl pass me and then I sprinted after Bella. Just as she was about to open the door, I grabbed her arm and spun her around.

She stared at me like I was nuts. "What the hell, Jake?"

"I need to talk to you."

She scoffed. "Well, it can wait. Nature calls." She went to go inside again but I took hold of her once more.

"I'm sorry, Bells. This can't wait." I slid my hand down into hers and pulled her after me. We somehow found a closed banquet room in the next hallway with no one around. I slid the door open and stepped inside. I closed the door quietly and led her into a corner of the room where the chairs were sitting, waiting to be used. I dropped her hand and grabbed two chairs, sitting them to face each other. I sat down and inclined my head to the other one so she would sit, too. She watched me for a minute and then picked up the chair, moved it away and came to sit in my lap instead, but unlike the past, she was straddling me now. I could feel her right up against me, probably how she had planned it.

"Bells, we can't sit like this." I went to get up but she pushed down on my shoulders.

"If you're really that desperate to talk, you will. Now, what's on your mind?"

"Bells, I really don't feel comfortable with you sitting on me like this." I looked away and not into her face since she was too close.

"Why? Because of this?" She rolled her hips against me and I grunted, grabbing them to stop her.

"Okay, that's it. Get off." I was pissed now, glaring at her.

She glared right back at me. "You'd like me to get off? Fine. I can get off. But you and I won't be talking. I'll just head back to the party. So, if that's really what you want..." She moved off of me and went to walk away when I grabbed her hand.

"Bells, I get that you're pissed at me but why the fuck are you doing this to me? Are you trying to rile me up and then walk away or something? I mean, I'm going fucking crazy here. I feel like I don't fucking know you anymore. You don't do these kinds of things. I mean, I get I fucked up, okay? But, Jesus Christ, I just want my fucking best friend back." My voice started to break near the end.

She turned back to look at me and I gave her a pleading look. She came back over and brushed the backs of her fingers against my left cheek. "Okay. I'll stop fucking around with you and be your Bells for a few minutes on one condition." I didn't say anything. She straddled me again and wrapped her arms around my neck, staring into my eyes. "I want a kiss."

"What?" I couldn't believe what she was asking me. What the fu-

"Just one kiss. It's my birthday. I deserve one. Especially after the last three months I've had, without you. I want a kiss."

"Bells, I don't think that's-"

"It's that or I don't talk to you the rest of the night and I tell Mom I never want to see you again." She arched a brow at me, daring me to challenge her.

"That's really fucked up, Bells," I growled. "I'm tempted to go for the second option." I'd had enough of the games.

She shrugged and released me, getting up. "It's no skin off my back. You haven't been around, remember? Well, if that's what you want." She sighed sadly and went to walk away when I grabbed her again.

She glanced back at me and I glared up at her, angry with her for backing me into this corner. "Fine. Just one. And make it quick."

She smirked at me and then straddled me, pulling me close like she did before. "Any last words?" She teased.

"Yeah. You've got thirty seconds and no tongue."

She snorted. "You're no fun."

"Yep. Whatever. Just hurry up and get it done."

She scoffed. "Wow. Am I really that horrible to look at? Or even want to kiss? Andrew seems to have no problem wanting to kiss me. And as you said, every guy is looking at me in this dress as well as Nick. So, what's the deal with you?"

I sighed impatiently. "It's different. You gonna do this or what?"

She scoffed again. "No. I don't think I will." She let me go and got up. "Just go home already. My life was better when you were out of it. Now you're just fucking up my birthday. Yet again. Thank God you and Chelsea don't live down the hall from me." She walked away.

I sighed angrily. "Bella."

"Go to Hell, Jake!"

I rolled my eyes and leaned forward on my knees. "Bella, get back here and just kiss me already. It's not a big deal if you don't make it one."

She stiffened and turned around. As expected, I'd pissed her off. "Not a big deal?" She hissed. She calmly walked back over to me. "Not a big deal? I ask you to kiss me just once on my birthday and you act like you're about to kiss a damn dog!" I didn't say anything, just waited until she got closer, staring up at her. "Not a big deal? After everything these past three months and I ask you for one thing! One thing! And you act like it's the biggest fucking chore for you? Are you fuc-"

She was close enough and I grabbed her then, pulled her onto me and kissed her. She was still rigid, still caught off guard but I cupped her face and kissed her the best way I knew how, hoping like hell that this would satisfy her while also stripping these new defenses away so I could get through to her. Moments later, she repositioned herself onto me and started to kiss me back.

She took my hands and put them on her hips and then she cupped my face, completely taking over the kiss. She moaned into my mouth, a moan I actually hadn't heard her make before, and she was kissing me passionately. The smacking of her lips against mine was pretty loud and quick in succession. I hated to admit it but...for the briefest of seconds, I liked what she did. She put everything she had into it and I could feel everything she was feeling. I _wanted_ to move, to kiss her back, but I forced myself to remain a statue. I should be disgusted with myself for ever wanting to do such a thing but Bella's beginning movements against my body commanded my attention. Reality came crashing back when I realized she was slowly grinding against me, stirring a natural reaction that couldn't be helped. I needed to put a stop to this immediately.

I pulled back slightly, breaking the kiss. "Stop," I demanded softly.

Her eyes were hooded and she was breathing fast, her chest heaving in and out. I made sure to keep my gaze glued to hers, worried where it might stray if I allowed it free reign. That was when the disgust finally hit me. Disgust with the situation and disgust with myself. This was _Bella_ kissing me. What the hell had I been thinking? "We need to stop," I said sternly.

She started to move her body against me once more and I nearly groaned. She was killing me. She leaned in close and moved harder, whispering to my lips, "I want you."

I froze. Was she serious? Where the hell had that come from? But then I remembered that my body, against its will, had been reacting to her movements. It had to be the same for her and she was just in the moment...right?

An image of her up against the wall with Andrew's hand under her dress earlier flashed through my mind and it solidified my resolve. It also aggravated me. How could she go from having that kid touching her that way to throwing herself at me? And me of all people? That angered me and before I knew it, I was responding to her request. "No," I whispered back harshly. "You asked for a kiss and you're getting one. That's it. This is way more than I should even be giving you. This is wrong, Bella. Besides, I have a girlfriend and you're with Andrew."

"They don't ever have to know. Mmmm, Jake. Please. Just give me this one thing and then you can go off into the sunset with her and never see me again. Please."

I scoffed in disgust and stood up, making her fall onto her ass on the floor. I towered over her, glaring at her. "Are you fucking kidding me? What the fuck is going on with you?! 'They don't ever have to know'? Since when did you start acting like your fucking mother?!" The hurt was back in her expression but I ignored it, too angry with what she had just suggested. "I would know, Goddammit! So would you! I let you kiss me because I figured you'd get it out of your system! Not because I want to fuck around with you! That's not gonna fucking happen, Bella! It will never happen! I care about Chelsea and I won't fucking cheat on her! And with you? Are you kidding me? I was married to your mom, for Christ's sake! And you're seventeen! Just a kid! What, you thought you'd just flash some ass at me and I'd just fucking go for it?! Now I can see why Chels has been all over my ass about this! She was right! I've been letting you twist me around your finger too fucking long! After tonight, I'm fucking done, you understand me?! With your mother, this head game bullshit and you! Done!" I stormed out of the room, ignoring her expression of agonized shock during my tirade. I couldn't believe she thought I'd just give her whatever the fuck she wanted like that. 'Fuck me, Jake.' 'Oh, okay, Bells." And Andrew and Chelsea would never know. They would never know that my former seventeen year old stepdaughter had come onto me and wanted me to sleep with her while they sat at her party waiting for her to make a reappearance along with everyone else, including my ex-wife, her mother. I scoffed again. What the fuck had happened to this girl?

...

**BPOV**

I watched Jake leave in shock, everything he said still ringing in my ears. Once the door was closed I couldn't help but burst into tears.

He confirmed what I had known to be true all along, what Lindsey had warned me about. He didn't want me and he never would. Not even for one small kiss. And now he didn't want me in his life at all.

Sobbing, I slowly removed my shoes and curled up into a ball, burying my face into my knees in my pain.

I loved him so much. Why couldn't he see that?

...

**JPOV**

"Hey," Chelsea greeted me coldly when I returned to the table. She studied me for a minute. "You okay?"

"Don't fucking start, Chels. I'm not in the fucking mood," I snapped, sipping the fresh beer I'd just gotten from the bar.

Chelsea scoffed. "Yeah. Whatever. It figures. We get along great these last three months and we're happy as can be. And then _she_ comes along and in one night, ruins everything."

"Enough with the fucking digs on her, alright? I'm already having a bad enough day without you adding this fucked up jealousy thing to it. Besides, it doesn't matter. Tonight's the last night I'll be seeing her. Or any of them for that matter. So, get your panties out of a knot."

Chelsea didn't say anything and I kept glaring over in the direction of the dance floor. Then I heard her sigh. "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to give you a hard time. I just couldn't stand that Ness was talking to you like that and trying to make you feel guilty. I was only trying to defend you and have your back. I didn't realize this was going to be the last time you saw her. So, I'm sorry for overreacting." She put a gentle hand on my knee and I sighed angrily, but grabbed her hand and squeezed it. "I love you," she murmured to me.

I didn't say anything back. I simply nodded and took another sip of my beer, rubbing the top of her hand in soothing circles with my thumb.

...

**BPOV**

I was still breathing raggedly but I cried until I couldn't anymore. I sniffled and got to my feet, holding my shoes in my hand. Like a zombie, I left the banquet room and returned to the hall that led to the party. Lindsey came out before I could run into the bathroom and when she saw me, she hurried over. I didn't say anything and neither did she; we didn't need to, she already knew.

"Okay. I thought this might happen when you told me that you invited _him_ so I'm staging an intervention. I want you to go outside to the fountain and sit there, take some deep breaths. I'm going to get your mom's keys and then something out of her car that I want to show you, okay?"

"Lindz, I-"

"Do it," she ordered. "Trust me," she assured me in a gentler tone. "This will help."

After a moment, I nodded and did as she said, keeping my face down when I passed the hostess stand at the entrance.

When I got to the fountain, relieved no one was there, I sat down and took some deep breaths as Lindsey said. After the sixth one, she appeared next to me with her laptop. "Okay. If you don't want to tell me, you don't have to but I have a pretty good idea already. It's Jake, right? And he was a prick to you, yet again?"

I sniffled and nodded. "I got a little carried away when he was kissing me and he basically told me he wanted me out of his life and that he would never want me like that. So, I expect him and Chelsea to leave soon. Who he made sure to tell me that he cares about and he would never cheat on her which basically means he really loves her." I sniffled again. "I wish I hadn't seen him. I wish I he hadn't come tonight. I was doing so much better without him and I didn't feel like my heart was torn out of my chest and stomped on." My voice started to break.

"Kissing you? Wait, he kissed you?"

I snorted and wiped under my eyes. "Don't look so surprised, Lindz. You knew how I felt. I saw an opportunity to show him how I feel and I took it. I asked him to kiss me. Just once. For my birthday." I laughed bitterly. "He didn't even want to do that. I guess I'm just that repulsive to him. He implied as much." I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

Lindsey seemed appalled for a moment but then shook her head and assumed her usual no-nonsense attitude. "Okay. You know what? He's an asshole and he doesn't deserve you in his life. I know it's hurting you right now but honestly, I'm glad tonight's the last night you're gonna see him. You have been doing so much better without him around to mess it all up and that...tramp. Ugh."

I laughed again. "Oh, well, if you ask Jake, apparently I'm the tramp. Not only do I act like one but I dress like one, too."

"Fuck him," Lindsey snapped. "I can't wait until he leaves. But enough about him. Look, I brought this because your mom wants to show this at some point in the party. She was going to ask me to take you out for about fifteen minutes, keep you busy, so she could play it but I think this calls for desperate measures."

My eyes snapped open. "Play what? Show what?" When I saw the DVD title menu, I lost my temper. "Is she kidding me?! She's not showing that! No way! Over my dead body!"

Lindsey took my hand in hers. "Focus. Forget about that right now. I'm not showing this to you so you can give her hell for it and try to stop her from playing it. I'm showing it to you because you need to remember who this girl is and how she is so much better without certain assholes in her life. We'll skip over _his_ parts, okay?"

I sniffled and shook my head. "Lindz, I appreciate what you're trying to do but it's not going to make it hurt any less."

"No, it won't," she said softly. "But it will remind you of who you are. You're not the Bella from three months ago. You're this Bella and this Bella doesn't take any shit. Even if it's from some guy she trusted and happened to fall for. Let him have Chelsea, they deserve each other. They can't even touch you, Bella. So, yeah it hurts and will probably for a while but you also are going to walk back into that party after cleaning up in the bathroom, with your head held high and you're not going to let them see how much they've hurt you. You're going to show them that their presence doesn't affect you in the least. Now, let's watch."

I wiped under my eyes again, sniffling once more. "Okay."

...

**JPOV**

I waited to see when Bella would walk back in. I was still fucking pissed at her, but I also wanted to make sure she was alright. I would never ever tell Chelsea what happened, either.

I hadn't meant to be so cruel to Bella. Truth be told, I had lost my temper and said some pretty mean shit to her and knowing what I did now, I felt somewhat sick about it. I shouldn't have lost it on her like I did. I should have sat her down and talked to her about it calmly and rationally. But instead, I went off the deep end. I sighed, annoyed with myself, and made the decision that if Bella didn't show up in the next five minutes, I would go looking for her. I didn't want a repeat of what had taken place back in June.

To my great relief, two minutes later, Bella walked back in, looking just as good as she had before I got her alone to talk. Lindsey was next to her with a laptop under her arm. I saw them walk towards Ness who was by the gift table. Bella was saying something, obviously agitated but in the end, she rolled her eyes and held up both hands with fingers splayed wide. Ness nodded once and then inclined towards the kids dancing. Bella nodded in return and then went to find Andrew. Lindsey stayed talking to Ness. Bella found Andrew and pulled him onto the dance floor with her.

I watched as they moved and then as Bella removed her shoes and threw them towards the edge of the floor, away from people. Andrew grinned at her, shaking his head and Bella smirked in response. She then pulled him close again and moved to the beat.

I took a sip of my beer as I watched her. It was almost as if what had just happened and what I said hadn't bothered her one bit. Obviously, I had been right; she wasn't the Bells I'd known and she didn't care if I hung around or not. That thought actually hurt somewhere deep in my chest. Where the fuck had my Bells gone?

...

**BPOV**

I was loving this. I was actually having a lot of fun as the girls and I danced to practically every song the DJ played. I had shed my shoes a while ago and moved on bare feet as the other girls did. I didn't think about anything else but what we were doing and slowly grinding up on Andrew when the song called for it.

_(Super Bass- Nicki Minaj)_

"Oh, Bella, it's our song!"

I laughed and Lindsey, Jess and I mouthed the words to the rap intro. Andrew and everyone else were watching, some cheering. Andrew was smiling wide, his arms crossed. As soon as the intro ended, I started jumping around to the beat with the girls, mouthing the words. Yes, we actually weren't doing any specific dance to this one, just jumping around, laughing and having fun.

Honestly, it was the best I'd felt all night. Like Lindsey had planned, I was reminded of all the good things in my life. Mom and I had an actual relationship. Her, Dad and Esme had made sure to make it clear I was their top priority. Mom and Esme were civil and even being friendly with each other. Mom was here, smiling as she was watching me from the sidelines. I'd be seeing Dad and Esme next weekend. Andrew was here as well as my two best friends and all three had stood by me during one of the worst times of my life and never left. Really, how did life get any better than this? I was completely fulfilled. Those who didn't want to be in it didn't need to be. And my broken heart would heal again, just as it had before.

...

**JPOV**

I watched Bella as she danced with the girls and all the other kids. She looked so happy, just enjoying herself. I was mostly relieved to see it. I wanted her to have fun, to get to act her age for once, but...I still couldn't help being angry with her for it. Didn't she care at all that I had said I was done with her? Granted, it was stupid and I had spoken out of anger, something I would need to apologize to her for, but...didn't it affect her just the tiniest bit? You wouldn't know that her and I had argued, watching her.

_(Bounce - Timbaland)_

I saw Bella grab Andrew's hand and pull him behind the rest of the kids who were pairing off to dance. I couldn't see her from this angle. What the hell?

Chelsea was talking to Nick again so I took the opportunity to disappear while she was distracted. Granted, she had calmed down since I had told her my intentions, and had even been somewhat sympathetic but she still kept her eyes on me. She knew I had gotten Bella alone before since I decided honesty was the best policy. I made sure to omit the kiss and Bella telling me that she wanted me part when I did, though. Well, being mostly honest was the best policy, anyway.

I positioned myself near the edge of the dance floor by the bar and caught sight of Bella grinding with Andrew to the beat. He was watching her body move into him, smirking. Bella moved as sensually as I'd ever seen her move, the kiss from before included. Thank God she hadn't moved like that with me. That would've just made it more difficult to be able to put us back in our rightful places. Bella turned around and Andrew ground into her from behind, them picking up right where they left. She ran a hand through her hair and laid her head back onto his left shoulder, her eyes closed. That lasted for about a minute and half when Bella's eyes snapped open and she turned back around, really grinding into Andrew, mouthing the words while smirking at him. If I didn't know any better, I'd say Bella was fucking him with their clothes on. I scoffed, shaking my head, and sipped the rest of my beer. Bells had never known how to dance; she had no rhythm and had been the clumsiest person with the worst two left feet I had ever seen. Now, here she was, dancing as if she were at a club. No, dancing as if she was giving Andrew a preview of what he was going to get later tonight. The thought made me sneer. Just another change - she wasn't my innocent Bells any longer. The realization pissed me off, more at myself than anything. Had I been there the last three months, when she had hit rock bottom back in June, when she had called me that night...

I shook my head clear, not wanting to think back to the glimpse of that night Ness had given us before, and watched Bella and Andrew dance to the rest of the song and then saw her laughing breathlessly as he kissed her. The song changed again and Andrew took her into his arms, moving her around to the slower beat.

_(Ring My Bells - Enrique Iglesias)_

When Bella was facing my direction for a minute, I saw that her eyes were closed and she was whispering the lyrics to him in his ear. I paid more attention to the song, wondering what the message she was giving him.

_You move in closer_

_I feel you breathe_

_It's like the world just disappears when you're around me_

_Because the way that we touch is something that we can't deny_

_And the way that you move, oh, you make me feel alive_

Yeah, I'd say the way he touched her made her feel alive. I'd seen and heard that plenty in the hallway earlier. I scoffed again and got another drink.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: ****I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**************I was going back over the last three chapters posted and I realized, since it's sort of coming into the middle of a story in a way, I'm not explaining very well to you guys why Bella is acting the way she is, why she's so hurt, etc. *face palms self* How stupid of me. Sometimes, I forget, when I'm re-reading/editing that I know what's going to happen and why this happens, etc., but people reading for the first time won't. So allow me to explain a little: Bella has been through a lot in her young life. Her mother, while being a single mom and providing money to pay bills, checked out mentally and emotionally as a parent. Ness is sort of still in that teenage party girl mode. Alice stepped in and helped the years Bella couldn't care for herself because she was way too young and was barely potty trained but Bella had to learn not too long after and she had to learn fast. Bella has pretty much raised herself and Lindsey's mother provided transportation for her most of the time, like when she went to school. Ness also hasn't always been kind to Bella (only after Bella tried to hurt herself did this start to change), has been pretty self-absorbed (and still is for the most part) and the guys she brought around weren't always the nicest to Bella, either. Granted, she didn't go through anything like she did in Trinity, but still, they weren't kind and that has always made an impression on Bella. She doesn't trust very easily and when Jake first came around, dating Ness, he had to work to get Bella to trust him. In the meantime, he and Bella bonded and made a connection that superseded the boyfriend/girlfriend's kid/\/stepfather/stepdaughter one. Bella was more like an adult in her head most times. So, they were able to become close. Jake was the first person, other than her friends Lindsey and Jess (and her Aunt Alice of course) that she let in. When Jake and Ness divorced after a short tumultous marriage (mostly due to the harsh relationship between Bella and Ness), Jake promised nothing would change but as we all know, life took over and things did change, regardless of Chelsea's interference. And while Chelsea is not so nice a person at times (that's putting it lightly), her being fed up with the situation is somewhat understandable and realistic. Jake and Bella's special relationship/closeness don't make sense to a lot of people but to themselves, it makes perfect sense. Jake's feelings towards Bella are completely innocent and friendship/family based while Bella's have obviously changed over time. She loves him and wants them to be more than friendly with one another but also struggles with the knowledge that he's been involved with her mother, that he's ten years older and that he is in a relationship with a girl who he just confirmed he's crazy about. Bella's struggling with these feelings and torn between telling Jake everything pointe blank and possibly losing him for good or just keeping them to herself with him never being the wiser. In the next chapter, you'll definitely see why Bella is so hurt when it comes to him putting her aside the last three months, I promise. ;-) I think Jake explains himself pretty well in this chapter.**

**I know the end of this chapter might be a bit tough and hang in there. Things aren't always what they seem. ;-)**

**Thank you for all of your feedback. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**BPOV**

_(Fix You - Coldplay)_

When the song changed again, Andrew held my left hand and I wrapped my right arm around him. He pulled me close so our heads were side by side. He started to sing the lyrics to me and I smiled, ignoring the tear that slid down my cheek. This had been Andrew's song to me once I told him the words reminded me of him and what he'd done for me. I just had to include it in the playlist for the DJ and when it started, Andrew had smiled warmly at me, knowing I'd played it for the both of us.

This had been after I had stupidly tried to kill myself. I thought I had scared Andrew off for good, convinced I just wasn't lovable and rightly so. But, he had proven me wrong and he stayed by my side, not just as my boyfriend but my best friend. The thought made another tear slip down the opposite cheek. I just smiled wider and let him sing to me.

...

**JPOV**

"You know, I gotta say, I really do approve."

I turned to look at Ness who had appeared next to me suddenly and saw that she watching Bella and Andrew just as I was. The only difference was she was smiling adoringly at them and I wasn't smiling period.

"This song's a strange choice for a birthday party, isn't it?"

Ness shrugged. "Bella chose it."

That was interesting. "Really? Why?"

"I'm not sure exactly but Bella said something about it being important. Alice thought it was because this song reminds her of Andrew. Apparently, Bella had told her that at one time or another." She sighed sadly. "It makes sense, you know."

I glared back over at the guy singing in Bella's ear, kissing the side of her head every so often; the guy who was currently making Bella cry. "How so?"

"Andrew really helped her through the tough time she went through. He's really good for her and he definitely loves her. I mean, look at them."

I scoffed, refusing to buy into the whole cutesy image of the moment. "Please. The guy just wants to get into her pants as often as possible." No need to tell Ness how I had come to that conclusion. "Like any other guy."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ness look over at me in disgust. "He happens to be quite good for her and he actually cares for her well-being. Believe it or not, Jacob, not every male is like you." She scoffed and walked away before I could retort.

I shook my head in disbelief, even more pissed off than I had been before. I turned my head around and didn't see Bella or Andrew anywhere on the floor. I glanced around and saw them both standing by the gift table. Andrew was rubbing the top bared half of her back and they were both staring down at Lindsey's laptop which was playing something. Bella, Andrew and Lindsey laughed and Bella turned to kiss Andrew's cheek. He turned to kiss her and then when she went back to the video, he stared at her for a moment, studying her and then kissed the side of her head tenderly.

I sighed angrily and decided I'd deal with Ness and her bullshit later on. Right now, I had to make things right with Bella, no matter how frustrated I was at her. I started heading towards her and the other two. Tonight was rapidly becoming a clusterfuck and I had to keep it from getting any worse.

...

**BPOV**

I laughed and turned to Andrew. "Remember how long it took them to start the ride up?"

He nodded, chuckling. "I think my feet fell asleep from standing there for so long."

I laughed again and kissed his cheek, smiling when he turned to kiss me full on.

"Bella." I looked back at Lindsey and she was staring behind me. "Asshole at six o'clock."

I sighed in annoyance and shook my head. "Alright. Do me a favor and turn this off. We'll watch it later. Andrew, can we go back to the table?"

He smiled at me. "Of course, babe." I didn't miss the glares he and Lindsey sent behind me. I took his hand, smiling reassuringly at Lindz, and then led him back to the table where Chelsea and Nick were talking. Andrew pulled out my chair and I sat down, letting him push me back in before sitting himself. I smiled warmly at him and leaned over to kiss him.

Lindsey plopped into her seat a minute later. "Okay. RBA's on his way over here."

"RBA?"

"Really Big Asshole."

"Ah. Code names. I like it."

Before Lindsey could respond, I heard my name being called. I sighed angrily and turned to look up at Jake. "What?" I snapped.

His jaw was drawn tight. "A slow song just started. Will you dance with me?"

My mouth dropped and I scoffed in disgust. "Are you kidding me right now?"

He met my eyes. "No."

"Jake, if you want someone to dance with you, I'll do it." Chelsea was next to him in a heartbeat. I gestured towards her, smirking. "There you go, Jake. You found someone to dance with. Enjoy." I turned back to Lindsey.

I felt someone grabbing my arm and lifting me to my feet. I spun on Jake, ready to take his head off.

"Hey, Jake. Take it easy, alright? If Bella wanted to dance with you, she would've said yes." Andrew was up, too, next to me.

Jake's eyes snapped to Andrew, glaring. "What goes on between me and Bella is between me and Bella. Stay out of it," he hissed.

"Don't talk to him like that!"

His eyes slid over to me. "Then dance with me. Just this once. And then I'll leave you alone and your boyfriend can put his hands anywhere he likes without a peep from me." Andrew and I both turned red.

"Jake! I just told you I'd dance with you. Come on," Chelsea urged impatiently. "It's obvious she doesn't want to."

Jake ignored her and stepped closer to me. "Dance with me," he pleaded softly.

I glared at him. "You promise to leave me alone if I do? For the rest of the night?"

He sighed sadly. "Yes. I promise. If you dance with me."

I nodded. "Okay. Just this once. Andrew, I'll be right back."

Andrew sighed but nodded, turning to kiss my shoulder before sitting down again. Jake's eyes flashed angrily at the action and he took my hand. He pulled me out of there, past Chelsea who was glaring at him and then me, and onto the dance floor.

He took me in his arms and started to dance. "I'm sorry for what I said before."

I refused to look at him, instead glancing around the party. "No, you're not."

"Yes, I am," he insisted. "I...reacted badly and I shouldn't have. I should have just talked it out with you."

I shrugged. "Too late."

He sighed and pulled me closer. "Will you please look at me?" I didn't respond but also didn't turn to do as he asked. I then felt his lips at my ear. "I get that I hurt you badly and I am so sorry about that. You have no idea how sorry. Bells, if I could go back and undo that mistake, trust me, I would."

I shrugged again. "But, you can't so why cry over spilled milk?"

He breathed heavily into my ear. "Tell me what I can do to make this right between us. Tell me what I can do to fix all of this."

I turned to look at him then, glaring. "You really want to know what would fix it all?" He nodded. "Get rid of your girlfriend."

His expression darkened. "Absolutely not," he hissed.

I shrugged, uncaring, and went back to staring out into space. "Then you have your answer."

"Why do you fucking hate her so much?"

I snorted and scowled up at him. "Why does _she_ hate _me_ so much? Or better yet, why do you allow her to make _you_ hate me so much?"

"I don't hate you," he snapped. "And neither does she."

"What a nice story. Tell me another and make it quick, the song's ending."

"Why the fuck are you doing this, Bella? You used to talk to me about everything. You used to tell me I mattered to you."

I scoffed. "Funny, you used to tell me the same thing. Until she came into the picture." His jaw tightened and he looked away. "Okay," The song ended. "You got your dance. Now, I'll head back to the table. You go your way and I'll go mine. It's been fun, Jake. Best of luck. With her, you're going to need it." I turned to walk away when he grabbed my arm and spun me around.

"Let me go," I said through gritted teeth.

He ignored me and yanked me out of the party, with me protesting all the way. Anyone who watched us, Jake glared at and so they didn't interfere. Naturally. Apparently, the birthday girl could just be shoved around. Nice.

He pulled me down the hall, the next one and then to the same corner Andrew and I had been in. He pushed me up against the wall and then he was on me, kissing me. "Is this what you want?" He taunted, covering my mouth with his. I refused to kiss him back and kept trying to get him away from me. "Huh? You want me, right? Let's go. Let's do it right here. Just like you and your boyfriend were earlier. I mean, that's what you want, right?" He reached down and unzipped his pants. "Come on."

"Let me go!"

He chuckled darkly. "Why? I'm giving you what you want. Right, Bella?"

I reached up and slapped him hard. I then shoved him in the chest and walked away, back down the hall. In seconds, he had me back in my original spot, this time with my arms held over my head. "Let me go," I hissed.

He was breathing heavily, obviously angry. "No."

"Let me go right now or I'll scream."

He smirked wickedly at me. "Promise?"

I opened my mouth to do just that and he slammed his lips into mine, sticking his tongue inside. I tried to move away but he kept kissing me. Had I not been so angry with him, I might have stopped struggling and enjoyed it, even kissed him back. Jake was kissing me. My Jake...kissing me... But, the realization that he wasn't going to let me go until he felt like it only served to enrage me further. I tried to fight him off more but he had me pinned so I just went limp, let him do what he wanted, but refused to respond or react.

He moved back, panting and staring at me. "What?" He nearly yelled. "Isn't this what you wanted half an hour ago? I thought you said you wanted me! You know, that Chelsea and Andrew would never have to know. What? Don't like it because you're not in control? So you can fuck with my head some more? Huh?!" I didn't answer him, just looked away. He snorted and pulled back. "That's what I thought. Are you ready to talk like adults now or should I keep fucking with your head like you've been fucking with mine?" I refused to say a word. He sighed loudly and loosened his grip on me slightly. "Why are you doing this, Bells? Why can't we just talk about this and work this out? We always used to be able to. Why not now? Yes, I've been gone for three months. I fucked up there. But I'm still here. I'm here right now and I want to be here after today. Why won't you let me?" I stayed absolutely silent. "I'm sorry I hurt you," he whispered. "I really am. I wish I never had but I did. All I want to do is make it right between us and get us back on track. I miss you, okay? I miss my best friend. It sucks not having her around."

I blinked tiredly but I wouldn't utter a single word.

I heard him sigh sadly and felt him pull my limp body into a hug, kissing the side of my head. "I miss you. Do you hear me, Bells? I miss you. I want you back. Find another way to punish me, okay? But don't kick me out of your life for good. I couldn't take that. Please. Don't shut me out, honey."

My eyes were misting and I hated myself for doing it, but I weakly hugged him back. He hugged me tighter to him in response. He sighed in relief. "There's my girl," he whispered. "You have no idea how good it feels, Bells, to be able to hold you like this again."

The familiar words brought flashes of that day back quickly. The day where I'd walked in on something I wish I never had. Hearing Jake yelling those things, hearing Chelsea yell hers, him calling her baby, him telling her how good she felt, a sick feeling of devastation crawling throughout my body but that wasn't the worst part. The worst was when I realized he'd lied to me. And not only that he'd lied to me but how far he'd gone to lie to me, making coughing sounds and purposely straining his voice. The pain came roaring back and I couldn't do it. No. I _wouldn't_ do this again.

With all of my might, I shoved him away as hard as I could and then I hurried down the hall. He went to grab me again and when he did, without thinking, I turned around and hit him in the chest. "How dare you say that to me?" I yelled. He stared at me in shock. "_Me_?! Is that what you tell all the girls? You call them baby or honey and tell them how good they feel to you, too?!"

All the color drained from his face. He knew immediately what I was talking about. "Shit. Bells, I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"Just leave me alone! I don't want you around anymore! Do you hear me?! Take Chelsea and leave! I don't want to see you ever again! I'm done!" I turned to leave when he grasped my upper arms again, stopping me.

"Bella, please," he begged. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay? What else do you want me to say? If I could go back and undo that day, I would, but I can't!" I struggled to get away from him but he held onto me tighter. "I'm so sorry it happened and everything that happened afterwards! I'm sorry, okay? I'm so fucking sorry. Just tell me what I can do to make it better!" He started to sound desperate and I noticed his voice was starting to break, indicating he was close to tears. "I'll do whatever you want me to. I won't break it off with her for you, I'm sorry. Ask me anything else but that. I'll do whatever you want. Whatever it takes. Just don't do this. Bella, please."

Tears slowly slid down my cheeks. "So she means more to you than I do? That's what you're saying, aren't you?"

"What? No! I'm not saying that all, just..." He pulled me back into him, sighing heavily, and wrapped his arms around the top half of my body, holding me tightly. "Bella, please," he pleaded with me in a watery whisper right at my ear. "Don't do this. You mean the world to me and I want to be in your life. Don't do this to us, Bells. Please." I just stood there, completely immobilized, not saying a word. "Please," he reiterated, sounding more hopeless than before.

I had no idea why I was about to do this to myself but I needed answers. "Why did you lie to me that day? Did you really not want to see me? The truth."

"Of course I did," he whispered. "I was all set to go and pick you up. And then Chels showed up, I made the mistake of telling her it was one of our _dates_ and she flipped out. She said I had to cancel with you that night or she and I were over. I didn't want to do it but in the end, I figured the most harmless way was to just tell you that I was sick that night and then make it up to you the next night or the next weekend."

"But you weren't sick, were you?" I hissed.

"No," he whispered miserably. "I didn't...plan on that. When I got done talking to you on the phone, she just...jumped me and I let her, doing what I could to keep her happy."

"Like you have these past three months."

He sighed sadly. "Mostly, yes. But I was also really busy. I didn't lie about that."

I scoffed. "I don't know when you're telling the truth or lying anymore."

"I wouldn't lie to you." I snorted. "I know I did that day but other than that, I have never lied to you, Bella. You know that."

"No." I pushed my way out of his arms and turned around, not caring that the action made more tears fall. "I don't know that. I don't know anything about you anymore. The Jake I know would have told me the truth that day, giving me more credit and not thinking I was so stupid. The Jake I know wouldn't have canceled our plans over a two week relationship and put me out to pasture these last three months because it makes his girlfriend happy. The Jake I know would not have said all the things you've said to me today, especially what you did back in that room. The Jake I know wouldn't have hurt me as badly as you have. So, no, I don't know that. I don't know anything!" I went to leave when he grabbed me and pulled me back into him again, holding me just as tightly as before.

"I'm sorry," he choked out. "I'm so sorry. Please, Bella. Please don't do this. I'll do whatever you want."

"Yeah, just like you told her these past three months, especially that night. You're just looking to placate me and keep getting what you want just like you do with her. Well, newsflash, Jake. I'm not her and I'm not backing down on this." I squirmed out of his grip. "When I go back in, I don't want to know you. Take Chelsea and leave. You wanted to keep your girlfriend happy and have all smooth sailing, well, now you've got it. Everyone warned me but I didn't listen. Because I still cared about you. Because I was convinced you cared about me, too. But this was a mistake. It was all a mistake. A huge mistake and I'm not letting you do this to me a second time." I sniffled. "So, go back in there, get her and leave. I don't want you here and I don't want to hear from you anymore. I want you to forget I even exist. That should be easy enough. You've been doing it ever since you met _her_." I walked away and even though I heard my name let out in a choked sob, I didn't stop or look back.

...

**JPOV**

I collapsed and slid down the wall much as I had earlier. Except this time, I was tearing up pathetically. I was relieved no one was here to witness me in this state.

Why couldn't Bella understand that I had never meant to hurt her? Why couldn't she understand how much I needed her? How much I wanted her in my life? Why was she doing this? Why did it hurt so fucking badly? I knew the answers to each question but I had hoped I could make it up to her, somehow work it out and get us back to where we had been. But, she had made it pretty clear that she didn't want that or me, period.

And that hurt so much worse than I ever thought possible.

...

**BPOV**

I quickly cleaned up in the bathroom before returning back to the party. I went to find Andrew at the table and ignored Chelsea glaring in my direction. Honestly, she was lucky I wasn't the same as I had been three months ago. Had I still been that bad, I might have run right over and slapped her, cursing her out in a drunken slur. But, no, I wasn't that person anymore. I wasn't even Jake's Bells anymore and all credit went to her. She had successfully taken my Jake from me. So, now, it was time to move on.

When Andrew saw me, he smiled. "Hey, babe. I put in a request and the song should be coming up next. Feel up to dancing with me?"

I smiled wider and sat down on his lap, clasping my hands behind the back of his neck. I saw myself in his eyes, the new me, the one who didn't let anyone make her feel like she'd never be their number one choice or never matter to them; the one who had learned to move on and was in a happier place, the one who had forgotten Jake had existed and all of the pain he had caused in that one day and afterwards, the one who was more herself than she had ever been, the one who loved Andrew. "Absolutely, love."

He smiled back at me and I kissed him.

...

**JPOV**

By the time I made it back to the party, I had allowed all the tears to slide down my cheeks, trying to come up with a way to make Bella see reason. Nothing had surfaced that seemed like a viable option. I had offered myself up to her like she had wanted earlier and she had rejected me. I had begged her, cried to her, yelled at her earlier, tried to talk to her but nothing worked. She had made it very plain: she didn't want to work anything out and she wanted me gone. For good.

I had stopped at the bathroom quick to make sure I didn't look like I had just been crying like the huge pussy that I was. Then I stepped into the room, my heart breaking all over again, when I saw Bella and Andrew dancing to a cover of a very familiar song.

_(Wonderwall - Ryan Adams)_

She had laid her head on his shoulder, her eyes closed and smiling happily. Andrew had his cheek against her hair and he looked even happier. My stomach still roiling, I slowly headed back to the table. Chelsea glared up at me and I ignored her. I didn't have time for her bullshit right now. Didn't she realize I had just lost one of the most important things in my life? Would she even care if she did? Or would she just do some kind of victory dance and celebrate? I knew I shouldn't be angry at her. This wasn't her fault; it was mine. But, right now, everyone was on my shit list, Chelsea Havener and Bella Cullen included.

...

**BPOV**

I lifted my head up and smiled at Andrew when the song changed. "I thought the last song was your request."

He smirked. "It was. But I also put in a request for you." He winked and I laughed, kissing him.

_(Great Escape - Kevin Rudolf)_

"So, everything go okay before?"

I sighed tiredly and nodded. "Yeah. I got my closure." Andrew knew about my feelings for Jake just like Lindsey did. It had been hard not to tell him. Andrew had been there when I had made one of the biggest mistakes in my life three months ago and feeling guilty that I had put him through such a traumatic and difficult event, I confessed everything to him. It was part trying to be truthful with him, feeling I owed him at least that, and part explaining to him why he needed to date another girl. I had been scared at first to tell him but figured he would see how unsuitable I was for any healthy relationship and would do what I expected him to: move on. He proved me wrong and now knowing Andrew the way I did, I shouldn't have been surprised but I had been back then. Andrew, while he loved me, also became one of my closest and true friends, right there along with Lindsey and Jess. He willingly stepped in where Jake had walked away and did what he could to help me through the rough spots. I would be forever grateful to him and while he didn't completely understand why I still felt the way I did for Jake, my former stepfather as he and Lindz had pointed out in the beginning, he still stayed by my side and lent me his constant support. I knew he hoped that one day I would finally leave Jake in the past as he and everyone else desperately wanted me to and that I would love him back in the same way he loved me. I hoped I could, too. Now, I just needed to purge Jake from my heart completely.

He cupped my cheek, stroking my skin softly. "You sure?"

I nodded again, my eyes tearing up. "Yeah, now I just get to go through the grieving part all over again," I chuckled bitterly and wiped a stray tear away. "You guys were right. It would've been better not to invite him. I wish I had listened to you and Lindz. I feel like I'm back at square one all over again."

He watched me sadly and placed his forehead against mine, prompting me to close my eyes. "You're not. We're here at your birthday party, dancing. That's a lot of progress considering how much you're hurting again right now. It's gonna get better, Bella. I promise."

I sniffled. "I know. It just hurts so much right now. But...I'll be okay."

He kissed my forehead. "That's the spirit."

I opened my eyes to stare into his. "I'm sorry that I keep crying over him to you. I know it's not right."

He smiled warmly at me. "I'm your best friend first before anything. You know that. And you've always been completely up front with me. You've never lied to me."

My face fell. "No, I haven't. And in the interest of keeping that honesty going, I need to tell you something. I know it's horrible on my part and I'm sorry, but I need to tell you."

He kept stroking my cheek. "You kissed him, didn't you?" More tears slipped down my face as I nodded. He sighed sadly. "Well, as your boyfriend, I'm not gonna pretend it doesn't hurt but you are telling me the truth like you always have and not trying to hide it. But, as your best friend, I get it. And now, like you said, you've gotten your closure." I nodded again. He kissed me gently. "Honestly, I'd rather you have done it and seen what would happen rather than always wonder and make me wonder along with you."

"I'm sorry," I whispered, sniffling.

He smiled once again at me. "Everything will be okay, Bella. I promise you. Let's just get through the rest of the night and then tomorrow will be another day."

I nodded, sniffling once more and laid my head against his chest. "Thank you," I whispered to him.

He kissed my hair softly. "I'm always here, Bella. I'm not going anywhere." I sighed in relief and closed my eyes, letting him hold me and in essence, holding me up so I could make it through the next couple of hours.

...

**JPOV**

I was drowning my sorrows in my refill. I knew Bella had told me to leave and I knew I should, but I couldn't seem to make myself get up and willingly walk out the door, dragging Chelsea behind me. I just couldn't walk away from her. Not yet.

A minute later, the DJ announced over the microphone that it was time for opening gifts. Everyone gathered around the table up front that held the gifts that had been brought. If I knew Bella, she was most likely thankful that there were more envelopes on the table than actual gifts. As a matter of fact, there were only a few gift bags, one of them being from Victoria's Secret. It reminded me of what I had said to Bella before and how I had held her up against the wall. I knew that wasn't what Bella really wanted from me. Then again, the more I thought about everything that she had said and done today, I couldn't really be sure what she wanted. Except for me to get rid of Chelsea and that wasn't happening. I loved Bella but I wasn't going to allow her to run my life for me. I was crazy about Chelsea, why couldn't Bella understand that?

"Aren't you going to go up and watch her open her gifts?" Chelsea asked me coldly.

Then again... "Nope. I'm hanging back here." I smirked. "If I know Bella, it won't last long."

I heard her snort in disgust and I just sighed in annoyance. Why couldn't she just get the fuck off of my back about this shit for once? My fucking chest felt like it had caved in and was throbbing painfully. Couldn't she just back the fuck off? For five fucking minutes? Jesus.

"You know, Bella asked me about that day, when I told her I was sick but I wasn't. You know, when she overheard us."

"Yeah and...?" Her tone was icier than before.

I shrugged. "When I was explaining it to her, I realized how much I'd fucked up. I should have never canceled on her that night." I took another sip of my drink. Let her make of that what she would.

"Maybe you shouldn't have. Then I wouldn't have to keep dealing with this shit. Then I would have a boyfriend who wasn't desperate to hang out with a high schooler. Then I'd be with someone who actually wanted to be with me and not some fucking little seventeen year old spoiled brat!" She was up out of her chair, walking away before I could even respond.

I glared at her retreating back. She was fucking pushing it. I'd had just about enough of this shit. I was already dealing with enough. I sat there, imagining life from now on, Bella completely removed from it and Chelsea being the center of it. I grimaced at the image my mind concocted up and sipped my drink again. I might've been crazy about Chelsea but I wasn't crazy about what I saw. Not one bit.

...

**BPOV**

While Mom coordinated everyone, even though I had told myself I wouldn't, I snuck a glance back at my table in the far corner. Sure enough, I saw Jake sitting there alone, drinking, looking absolutely miserable. I was slightly angry that he hadn't done as I'd requested. But then I found myself wondering if he and Chelsea had fought. I didn't see her anywhere near there. And then I remembered, I wasn't supposed to wonder; I wasn't even supposed to care.

I took a deep breath and focused on the task at hand. I had never been comfortable being the center of attention, especially with my expressions being scrutinized so closely, but I would buck up and deal with it. Everyone here had come to see me and help me celebrate my birthday. The least I could do was show them how grateful I was for their kindness and generosity.

Lindsey squeezed my hand as she stood next to me and I smiled over at her. Once Mom finished corraling everyone into a large group, Lindz handed me the first envelope. Let the fun begin.

...

**JPOV**

I had moved to the bar to get a new drink as I watched the spectacle of Bella opening her gifts. It was obvious she was uncomfortable with all of the attention as well as all the gift cards and gifts she was getting but, she put on a pretty good show, I had to admit.

My eyes raked over her once more. I had seen her in shorts and pajama shorts plenty of times, not to mention a bathing suit, but, as much as I hated to admit it to myself, I had never seen her legs look as good as they did tonight. The dress showed them off nicely, especially with the heels she had been wearing. But as hot as she looked, as Nick had so eloquently put it, nothing matched the beauty of her smile, the joy her laugh caused and the happiness she stirred deep within me from just watching her.

Andrew had no idea how lucky he was. None whatsoever.

I saw Bella pick up a familiar looking envelope and her face fell slightly for a second before the smile was pasted back on. If you weren't watching her closely and didn't know her as well as I did, you would have missed it. She obviously had seen that the envelope was from me. That made my heart clench inside my chest. She literally wanted nothing to do with me. She had been completely serious and even though I had known that, whatever small glimmer of hope I had to change her mind later on was snuffed out.

I watched as Bella said something quietly to her mom. Ness then announced to the crowd, "Okay, this one is from Jake and Chelsea." One quick glance at the other end of the group confirmed Chelsea had nothing but an intense scowl on her face which turned into a death glare when she looked back over at me. I just shook my head and sipped my drink again.

Bella opened the envelope and then the card. Her eyes teared up when she saw the tickets. She read the writing on the card and I saw her eyes become even glassier but she hid her pain behind a smile well. I knew exactly what line I had written that she had read at that moment. _"You. Me. City. Dinner. Your favorite play. Awesome seats. I'll do my best not to fall asleep. Can't wait to take you out for your birthday. Miss you, Bells. Love, Jake."_ Ness glanced over her shoulder and her brows arched before announcing the gift to the crowd. I saw Bella stare at the card a moment longer before closing it and handing it to Lindsey, saying something to her. I then watched as Lindsey set the envelope aside in its own spot, away from all the others. My eyes narrowed. What did that mean?

I watched as Bella went through the first gift bag and I sighed, walking back to the table. I guess that plan was shot to hell now, too. Well, maybe Andrew would take her or one of the guys or Ali, someone. She'd let anyone take her. Anyone except me.

...

**BPOV**

I thanked everyone as they started to disperse. Lindsey handed me the card I'd asked her for and I slowly made my way back to the table to see Jake still looking miserable, still drinking. How many beers now was that for him? I dismissed the thought as I approached him.

"Jacob," I said quietly. His head snapped up towards me, clearly surprised that I was there and speaking to him. His eyes were glassy but whether that was due to the alcohol or being upset, I couldn't tell. I held the envelope up in question. "A Broadway musical?"

He shrugged, taking another sip of his beer. "You said it was your favorite and you never got to see it so I figured, why not?" He then sighed sadly. "Look, I got those before everything...tonight. So, if you want to go with someone else, it's fine. The tickets are yours. They're a gift. Do what you want with them." He gave me an even sadder smile, evidently trying to show me that he wasn't trying to be a jerk about it.

I sighed quietly. I hoped I wouldn't regret this. Before I could speak, Chelsea was next to him, taking his hand in hers and intertwining their fingers, placing them in her lap, with her glare in place. The message was clear: he's mine, back off. Jake stared at their joined hands and then Chelsea almost as if confused. Maybe he had drunk more than I had originally thought. Chelsea gave him a warm loving smile to which his brows furrowed but then he turned back to me. I forced myself to smile politely. "Well, they're really great so thank you."

He smiled sadly again at me. "You're welcome."

I smiled wanly and left them to their own devices. I shook my head to clear it. I had been about to do something incredibly stupid so I actually owed Chelsea for saving me from myself, ironically enough.

I took a deep breath and then smiled once more as I approached Lindz and handed her the envelope to slip in the bag with the rest.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: ****I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic (especially Ness' reaction to everything in this chapter, especially based on her previous characterization), but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**************For those who aren't crazy about Bella and her character, all I can say is she's seventeen, still somewhat a teenager but has also grown up way too fast in other areas. She's trying to find balance between the two though it's a very fine line, obviously. As for Jake, yes, he is going through a lot and some of it is unfair but some of the things he's put Bella through in the last few months and will in this chapter aren't fair, either. And to those that like Chelsea, that's cool but trust me, when I say, there's more going on there than you think and you'll find that out in this chapter. I myself can understand Chelsea's irritation and why she does what she does, but she's still a bitch when she wants to be. ;-) For those who love Andrew, I do, too! I can assure you that he's there to stay but as what, well, who knows? ;-) He's definitely a representation of that good guy who always finishes last, that you know you should love because he loves you and is good for you but you can't for whatever the reason. Some people are lucky and are able to fall in love with their best friends and vice versa. Some people aren't so lucky. And Andrew is definitely a rep of the latter group most of the time. =( But I do love him. I keep saying that I'll give Bella Jake and keep Andrew all for myself lol. ;-)**

**I know the end of this chapter might be a bit tough and hang in there. Things aren't always what they seem. ;-)**

**Thank you for all of your feedback. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**JPOV**

The DJ had started playing his music again and I watched as Bella spoke to Lindsey and Ness. She was smiling, laughing a couple of times and then shrugging, saying something to make Lindsey giggle. I then watched as Lindsey took her hand and led her outside, with Bella looking confused and gesturing back towards the room as they left.

I sighed, sipping my drink again. I missed her so fucking much. I wanted nothing more than to take her to that play but now I couldn't even do that.

I felt Chelsea drop my hand and I turned to look at her, confused. Her warm smile was gone and back was the glare from Hell. "I'd like to go soon."

I snorted. "Yeah, well, the party's not over yet. I'm not leaving 'till it's finished. You want to go home before then, call a cab."

She scoffed. "Figures. I should've known you were full of it before when you said you were done with her. God forbid you should ever be without your darling Bella."

I scoffed back. "God, you can be such a bitch." The alcohol I'd imbibed repeatedly in the last half hour had loosened my tongue. "Almost as much as Ness if not worse. Why are you acting like this right now? You were never this bad before."

Her jaw dropped and then her face darkened. "Yeah, well, you weren't trying to get laid by a seventeen year old before. Oh wait, my bad, a sixteen year old!"

I shook my head, sighing, willfully forgetting Bella's and mine interactions of the day. "You're sick, Chels. That's not how mine and Bella's relationship is at all."

"Maybe not for you," she spat at me. "But for her? Every time I turn around, she's all over you, making moon eyes at you."

I laughed. "Moon eyes?"

"Don't sit here and laugh at me like I'm the world's biggest idiot," she snarled. "I know what I saw. The girl's head over heels for you. How can you not see it?"

My brows furrowed as I thought back to everything that had been said between Bella and I and a minute later, I shook my head. "No. Sorry, Chels. But you've got it wrong. Bells and I are friends, like close family, nothing more."

"Again, maybe for you but not for her. I wouldn't be surprised if she tries to jump your dick before the night's out."

I grimaced in disgust, hating that everything she was saying was making moments between Bella and I from today flash through my head, almost lending truth to Chelsea's accusations. No, I knew Bella and I knew better. Chelsea was just jealous, annoyed that we had to be here... "You're being fucking nasty, Chels. Bella's not like that and again, it's not like that between us. Why the fuck do you hate her so much? Why are you so threatened by her?"

"Because of what she does! She's not the little innocent Bella you keep thinking she is. She wants you, Jake. Plain and simple."

Bella...moving against me...her eyes half shut...saying she wanted me... I shut down that line of thought immediately. "She does not," I laughed it off, refusing to let Chelsea plant any doubts in my already fucked up mind. "I think you're reading way too much into things, Chels."

"Oh really? What am I reading too much into? A needy little girl who's got it bad for her ex-stepdad? The girl's got some serious fucking Daddy issues, Jake, and hearing about her drinking like a fish and trying to off herself just because you couldn't go play Daddy for a few hours just proves it! I can't believe I put up with this shit as long as I have. I should've known the first time when I met her and she couldn't keep her eyes off of you. I thought she'd finally moved on when you kept your distance and she started to date that kid but no. She's still got it bad for you and now you and I are fighting nonstop when everything's been great between us these last few months. And all because she can't just go fuck that kid or move onto her possible new stepdaddy over here!" Nick was staring at her wide-eyed.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Did you just hear yourself?" I snapped.

"Bella's not like that, Chelsea," Nick said cordially. "She's a good kid. As good as they come."

I nodded, agreeing with him. "There you go."

"Oh, please. That is such bullshit. She just hasn't come onto him yet, but you wait, Nick. It's coming. Ness saw it in her when she was married to Jake. She'll see it again with you."

"Oh, here we go again." I rolled my eyes.

"See? You don't believe me but you watch. As a matter of fact, why don't you go ask her about all the love letters she's been slipping under your door as of late?"

My jaw dropped. "What the fuck are you talking about?" Chelsea didn't say anything, only glared at me. I leaned forward slowly, glaring right back at her. "I said, what the fuck are you talking about?"

Chelsea crossed her arms and sat back. "Bella's been sending you love notes for weeks."

I scoffed at the outright lie. No way had Bella been doing that. Even though Bella wasn't crazy about my relationship with Chelsea, even if she somehow harbored more than friendly feelings for me, she would never do that. "That's bullshit."

"No, it's not!" Chelsea snapped.

"Then why haven't I seen anything?" I sipped my beer, sitting back and arching my brows challengingly at her.

This time, she was the one who leaned forward. "Because I saw them and made sure to drop them off at her mailbox so she'd cut it out."

"Wait. That was you?" Nick asked. My head snapped in his direction. What?

"Yeah, it was," Chelsea scoffed. "That's fucking trashy, giving that shit to my boyfriend and bringing it to his house, thinking I might not see it. Boy, was she wrong."

I glanced towards Nick questioningly, silently begging him to confirm that Chelsea's accusation against Bella was unfounded or she'd been mistaken or- He shrugged. "I don't know anything about love letters. I just thought they were little notes like 'hey, what's up?' or 'hey, hope to see you soon'. I don't know anything about all of that other stuff. That doesn't seem like Bella. We all know she cares about Jake but...not like that." I let out a quiet sigh in relief and glanced over at Chelsea with a 'I-told-you-so' look. "Although," My head snapped back to Nick. "Bella did get awfully upset each time they were returned. She would act like she was fine when Ness asked her what was wrong but she'd hurry into a bathroom or upstairs and it wouldn't be too long before we'd hear her burst into tears. Ness and I had no idea what she was getting in the mail at the time. Bella wouldn't tell anyone. Ness started scanning the mail, but somehow Bella always got to it first, almost as if she was expecting it. But now knowing this...that explains a lot actually."

I felt like I was standing on the edge of an abyss. No, they had to be wrong. Both of them. I knew Bella, knew her like the back of my hand. "Explains what?" I snapped as Chelsea gave me a smug smirk.

"Why she was so devastated about this whole, I don't know what you call it, chicken soup thing. When you didn't get back to her. I'd say it was almost a week after that whole thing happened that she started drinking, according to the girls. But who knows? Maybe she was drinking way before that, not sure. But why else would she be so desperate to try to kill herself? It doesn't make any sense except some unreturned infatuation, an unrequited crush or whatever you call that crap."

Chelsea gestured towards Nick with her hand as if to say, 'See?'

"Her mom had hoped whatever was bothering her was gone since the mail incidents had happened less and less once she came back from her trip but obviously not."

Chelsea scoffed. "Yeah, because she can't break us up. She keeps begging him to get rid of me in these little love notes of hers, claiming she and Jake have some kind of special connection that he'll never have with me or anyone else, not even Ness. She keeps going on about how no one has to know and how she's been _so_ in love with him since they met. I mean, can you believe that? It's ridiculous and exactly what I've been telling Jake all this time. The girl has issues, big time, and him allowing her to keep up this obsession with him is only going to make things worse. He needs to put a stop to it. Now. I think I've been pretty understanding, even when finding all the things she wrote, but enough is enough already!"

I drank my beer not saying anything.

"Well," Nick tried to be civil. "You know, Bella's been through a lot. I don't think that's any secret, even before this past year. Ness will even admit it herself, she's been rather hard on Bella. She might have a few issues here and there but no more than the rest of us. As for her and Jake, they were kind of close since the beginning and he did show her a lot of attention...I don't know, she's young, I could kind of see how that could turn into a crush but a harmless one. I seriously doubt Bella would ever try to do anything to break you two up or force Jake to do something he doesn't want to do. He was her stepdad for a bit after all." I needed to remember to thank Nick later for injecting common sense into this crazy conversation and for shooting holes in Chelsea's warped theories on my close relationship with Bella. Because in doing so, he cooled off my growing rage when Chelsea spouted familiar words - familiar words that Bella had spoken herself not that long ago to me. There was no way Bella had been doing what Chelsea accused her of. No way...

"A crush? A harmless one? It's not just a _harmless_ crush, Nick. She's downright obsessed with him! I always tried to be nice and then what do I hear today? She tries to kill herself over him! Funny, how she didn't mention _that_ in any of her letters."

I was losing my patience more and more by the second. It felt as if I was about to eplode.

"Well, it's tough for her to talk about," Nick soothed. "Besides, if that was part of her reasoning at all, it was only part. But, she's in counseling now. Maybe the therapist suggested she do that whole write a letter thing, saying what you want to say type deal, you know like you hear about in the movies." I gave a slight nod. That sounded good. That's all Bella was doing, just writing her feelings...feelings...

"Yeah, but you're _not_ supposed to send them or slip them under that person's door. You're not supposed to list explicit sexual fantasies on every single message, stating what you'd like to do to that person or how often you touch yourself while thinking of them!" Nick uncomfortably dropped his eyes to his plate and didn't say anything. My grip tightened on my bottle. What the fuck had Chelsea just said? "I mean, how am I supposed to feel when I read in a fucking letter she writes him that when she overheard us that one time that her little friend mentioned earlier, that she also saw us and wished that she was in my place and he was saying all of those things to her?"

I felt like I couldn't breathe. No. No... Images flew through my brain at lightning speed: Bella leaning into me at the table, Bella sitting on me and asking me for a kiss, Bella staring at me with hooded eyes and telling me she wanted me, Bella yelling at me in the hallway, Bella being touched by Andrew, Bella sniping at me when I danced with her, Bella fucking with my head, Bella tearing up and insisting she never wanted to see me again... _"It hurts listening to the person you find yourself in love with having sex with someone else, doesn't it?" "I want you." "They don't ever have to know." "So she means more to you than I do? That's what you're saying, aren't you?" "You really want to know what would fix it all? Get rid of your girlfriend.""It's that or I don't talk to you the rest of the night and I tell Mom I never want to see you again." "Just give me this one thing and then you can go off into the sunset with her and never see me again." "They don't ever have to know."_

That was it. I erupted out of my chair, ignoring Chelsea calling my name and headed outside where I'd last seen Bella walking to. _"I don't know when you're telling the truth or lying anymore." _Funny, I never knew when Bella was lying or telling the truth anymore herself. But I was about to fucking find out.

...

**BPOV**

"Lindsey," I laughed. "If you haven't found it by now, I doubt it's here."

She kept digging through Mom's backseat. "No. It's here. I saw it. I will find the elusive piece of crap."

I laughed again, shaking my head. "I swear this feels like a ploy to get me out of the room for a few minutes." I saw Lindsey's blush before she tried to hide it. "Crap. I knew it. What is she doing?"

"I don't know what you're referring to."

"She's showing that damn video after I threatene her and told her not to, isn't she? Ugh!" I ran a hand through my hair. "I'm not going back in now. Ever."

Lindsey laughed. "Yes, you are." She got out of the car, shutting the door and smoothing down her dress. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's something to be proud of. You worked really hard and it shows in that video."

I shrugged, blushing. "It's really not that big a deal, Lindz."

"Uh, yeah it is. Your mom's so proud of you she wants to show you off. And she's right."

I rolled my eyes. "God, can you imagine if I had let them circulate it like they originally wanted to? I swear, Mom would've funded the DVD production herself and Dad would've been showing it _every_where."

Lindsey laughed and I grinned.

"Bella!" We both spun around to see Jake charging towards us, looking furious.

"Jake," I said worriedly. "What's wrong? Are you alright?" I lifted a hand to his shoulder but he smacked it away, hard, making me gasp. What on earth...

"You've got some fucking nerve, you know that? How dare you try to get me to break up with my girlfriend? Why? So you can fuck me like you said you did?"

My jaw dropped and my face burned. Lindz didn't know about the kiss yet, I hadn't told her, but I never intended for her to know just how much I lost control with Jake and offered something up to him that I hadn't yet offered my own boyfriend. Where the hell was this coming from? I was seriously starting to wonder if Jake was bipolar with how back and forth he was the past couple of hours. Then again, the same could be said for both of us. Our whole situation was very back and forth. "Jake, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not-"

"Oh yes you do!" He yelled, getting in my face. The rancid stench of a mix of different kinds of alcohol filled my nostrils and I nearly gagged. Well, that somewhat explained him flying off the handle. Jake was a drinker but but not a serious one. He definitely had been drinking something other than his usual beer. And the result in conjunction with our constant arguments was glaring at me with an intense amount of loathing. I nearly shriveled up in his gaze. "Don't fucking lie! Nick said he saw the letters!"

I actually for the first time felt afraid of him. All of the hatred in his eyes was for me. "Letters? But I-"

"Writing down what you want to do to me in bed and how you want me to break it off with Chelsea so you and I can be together? Are you fucking kidding me?"

My cheeks flamed but now I was also angry. "Jake, I don't know what you're talking about! I didn't write anything like that! I only wrote-"

"Ah! So you admit it! So you are trying to fuck up my relationship!"

"No, I'm not. I was only telling you-"

"What? How you saw me and Chelsea fucking that night that you came to the apartment? How you wished you could be the one riding me instead of her?! Funny how you forgot to mention that part when you threw it back in my face, huh?"

My heart jumped in my throat. "Did she tell you that I-"

"Yeah, she did! She said you were watching us like a sick fucking pervert!" He started walking forward, forcing me back into the car, and leaned in closer to my face. "Did you like what you saw? How good I was giving it to her? How I made her scream? Or better yet, how she was driving me fucking crazy with how good she was? That she's one of the best fucks I've ever had? HUH?!"

My eyes filled up. "Why are you saying these horrible things?" I choked out.

"Because of what you wrote and then left for my fucking girlfriend to find!"

"Jake, leave her alone!" Lindsey yelled, finally being jerked out of her state of shock that we had both shared until Jake angered me before.

He glared over at her and pointed a finger in her direction. "You mind your own fucking business! I've had just about enough of your shit! If you don't want any of this, stay out of it!"

I pushed at him roughly. "Don't talk to her like that!"

"Oh, you like to push, huh? Okay!" He moved in so close, I could feel the car against every vertebrae of my spine. "If you think that I would ever stick my dick in someone like you, you've got another thing coming. You disgust me. You pretend to be something you're not. I can't even stand being this close to you. I just want to fucking puke." Tears fell down my face and he laughed darkly. "What? That not part of your little game? Don't know what to say? Don't know what to do to keep fucking with my head?! Or maybe it's that you can't handle the truth. Well, Bella, how about some more of the truth? When you kissed me in there, I don't think I've ever been so fucking turned off in my life. And you, asking me to give it to you like you did. Like I would fucking drop my pants and fuck this!" He gestured towards my body with his hand, making more tears slip out of my eyes. "I can barely stand being around your mother but I'd fuck her again in a heartbeat before I'd ever look at the daughter. Ever!"

"Then just leave!" I yelled, starting to break into sobs. "Then, just go! If I'm so repulsive to you, go!"

"Leave? Go? Is that all you ever have to fucking say?" He started hitting the car on the sides of me, making me shut my eyes and cry out in fear. This definitely wasn't my Jake; my Jake was nowhere to be found and in his place was this nasty, scary person that I didn't know. "When you're the one that's been fucking with my head nonstop since I got here? I regret ever fucking meeting you! I'd rather be fucking dead than deal with you ever again!" He hit the car a few more times, yelling something indiscernible to me. "You stupid fucking bitch! Just like your mother but you're worse! You fucking piece of shit!" He hit the car again and then moved away.

I was taking in ragged breaths, still frightened, still uncertain of just what was happening here. I knew one thing, though. I was about to lose Jake and I couldn't...I couldn't lose him. "But Jake, I didn't-"

And then the next thing I knew, I was on the ground on my side, my ankle throbbing and my knees scraped up from when I first fell. I started sobbing, feeling the pain in my hands that had tried to break my fall. "Lindsey, get Andrew," I begged. "Get me Andrew, please."

Lindsey was next to me on the ground, hugging me from my other side. "Shhh. I already called him." Had she? When? "He's on his way out. Shhh."

"Bella!" Andrew was in front of me in a second, kneeling down. I started to cry harder at the sight. "Jesus. What the fuck happened? You said she wasn't hurt on the phone."

"She wasn't when I called you. But after I got off with you, he started to leave and then turned around and pushed her. She fell and hurt herself."

"I am gonna kick that fucker's ass!"

"No!" I cried out. "Andrew, please. Just help me and take me home. Please. I don't want to go back in there like this."

"Okay, baby. Okay." He glanced over at my feet, seeing the heel that had snapped when I had fallen back in response to when Jake had unintentionally pushed me roughly back into the car. "Are you able to walk?"

"I-I don't know."

"Okay, baby. Hang onto me and I'll help you up." He put his arms around me and gingerly helped me to my feet. I immediately started crying in pain when my ankle hurt like hell. I had to lift the leg up. Andrew swore under his breath. "Alright. Baby, I know you're gonna hate this but we have to take you to the hospital. Just to get checked out."

"No." I shook my head. "No hospital."

"Bella," he said gently. "I can't tell whether that's a sprain or a break. If you don't get it checked out, it will take forever to heal and it won't heal right. Please. I'll be right there with you."

I sniffled and nodded. He picked me up bridal style and started carrying me towards his car. Lindsey followed behind with my shoes and cell phone.

"Lindz, do me a favor. Go inside and get Ness for me."

"No!" I yelled. "No! She'll have him arrested! It was me, I fell! He didn't mean for me to fall! I'm telling you, he didn't! Please!"

He and Lindsey both looked at me in disbelief. "Bella, I saw him! He pushed you and then shook his head, laughing at you while you were on the ground, crying! He didn't even look back when he went inside!"

"Something must have happened to him! He's not normally like that! I'm telling you, he wouldn't hurt me!"

"Bella!" Andrew cut me off. "This has got to stop! You can't protect him! Look at what he did to you!"

"He didn't mean to! I know him! I know he didn't! He's never hurt me before! Ever!"

"Okay, you know what? I've had enough! Lindz, we're heading back inside! Follow me!"

"What? No, Andrew! Don't! Please don't!"

"No!" Andrew yelled. I was shocked into silence; he never yelled at me. "I think it's time you see this asshole for what he really is and just how much better off you are without him! Then you'll finally get it! He's not worth your fucking time! Let's go, Lindz!"

...

**JPOV**

I sat back in my chair, sighing angrily. I hadn't mean to get so fucking angry but I'd fucking had it. Bella needed to know that I was done with her. I was done with her games. She had been fucking playing me this whole time. Finding out about the messages was the last straw.

"Where'd you storm off to?" Chelsea asked.

"Nowhere."

"Oh-kay."

"Drop it, Chels," I snapped and took another sip of my beer.

She scoffed at me but sat back and kept quiet for once.

I ran a hand through my hair, sighing once more. I needed to get the fuck out of here. I was going fucking insane. Images of Bella crying and then when she lost her balance were tearing at my heart. God knows I wanted to run out of this building and go to her but I had to be strong. I forced myself to stay glued to my seat. Bella needed to understand that Ness' way was not the right one. The mind games, the using sex as a ploy, etc. was not okay. I had tried to talk to her before but she had rebuffed me and was more interested in messing with my head, trying to get her way. Well, she would see where that got her now. I just wished it didn't hurt so much...

I heard a few gasps and a minute later, the music cut off. I glanced up and saw people rushing towards the entrance. Oh, what the fuck now? When I still couldn't see a few seconds later, I got up and went to see what the big commotion was.

...

**BPOV**

I hid my face in Andrew's neck, sobbing quietly.

"Oh my God, Bella, what happened?!"

"Is she alright?"

"Did she get hit by a car?"

"It's those shoes, I bet. Look, one's got a broken heel."

I buried myself further into Andrew as he moved me, keeping my eyes shut.

"Bella?! Oh my God, what happened?! Bella?!" I heard my mom ask frantically.

"Ms. Cullen, I need to speak with you privately. You mind leading us somewhere we can talk for a minute?" Andrew asked politely but impatiently.

"Not until someone tells me what happened to my daughter!"

"I will. It's just, you know how Bella feels about the spotlight." She must have agreed because then Andrew spoke up. "Do me a favor. Get Nick and Jake and bring them with us. I'm gonna go ask the hostess if there's a room I can bring her to for a few minutes to clean her up."

I then felt him turn around and move, ignoring all the blips of conversation going on around us. I heard the doors open and after a minute or so passed, he asked the hostess where he could set me down, possibly some private room for me and my family. She must have showed him somewhere and he thanked her when she said she would go get a first aid kit. He then asked Lindz to go get the rest of the group.

"Andrew," I whispered pleadingly. "Please. I can't take him saying anything more like he did outside. Not right now. Please."

"Baby, just relax, okay? If he does, you have me, Lindz, Nick and your mom to put him in his place and get him to stop. Okay? Just trust me on this." I didn't answer, just nodded against him, sniffling.

Andrew sat down with me somewhere and kept me in his lap, rubbing my back and allowing me to stay burrowed into him. Soon, I heard the door open and a few people walk in. I heard a feminine gasp though I had no idea who it came from.

"What the hell happened?" Chelsea asked.

I tightened my grip on Andrew but refused to look up or answer her. Of course, Jake brought her along. This way she could see the proof of his rejecting me and throwing me out of his life. Of course.

Andrew must have held up a hand because one disappeared from my back momentarily before returning to its original spot. I then heard the hostess tell Andrew the first aid kit was next to him and to let her know if he needed anything else or if she needed to call an ambulance. She also said she would let the manager know about my condition and send him to see us. He thanked her and waited until the door was closed. Before he could speak, though, Mom's voice boomed throughout the room.

"Alright, enough with the suspense. How the hell did this happen to my daughter?"

"Well, that's simple, Ms. Cullen. Jake did this to her." There were more shocked gasps this time, but definitely a mix of both male and female.

"What?" Jake yelled. "I didn't fucking do that to her!" Tears burned underneath my eyelids as I listened to him deny their accusation, seeming almost uncaring. It shouldn't have hurt as much as it did, not after what he said outside, but still...it hurt.

"Yes, you did!" Lindsey yelled back. "I was there and I saw it! Don't lie! You pushed her and made her fall! And that was after being in her face, threatening her, scaring her and saying mean shit to her! You saw her fall after you pushed her and you laughed before you walked away! I saw you, you fucking asshole!"

"Hey!" Chelsea intervened. "Don't you dare talk to him like that!"

"Fuck you!" Lindz retorted.

"Why, you-"

"I didn't knock her down and I certainly didn't laugh at her!" Jake boomed over them, stopping the yelling match that was about to begin. "First of all, I didn't push her that hard. She reached out, put her hand on my shoulder and I knocked it off. She swayed and fell. That wasn't pushing her!"

"Liar!" Lindz accused him.

"Okay, enough!" Mom snapped. "Jacob, is this true?" She hissed.

"What this one's been telling you? No! What I just told you? Yes!"

"Then why would you be knocking her hand off of your shoulder? If you saw her falling, why didn't you reach out to catch her? Why would you be putting your hands on my child AT ALL?!"

"I didn't put my hands on her, I didn't push her! And I didn't catch her because it happened too fucking fast!"

"BULLSHIT!"

"Shut the fuck up!" Chelsea roared back at Lindsey.

"You shut the fuck up!"

"Enough! So, Jacob, you're telling me that you knocked Bella's hand off of your shoulder, you saw her about to fall, did nothing because it was too fast and you watched her fall? Yes?" Mom asked icily.

"Not exactly like you put it but yes," Jake conceded.

"So, why didn't you help her up after she fell?"

There was only silence after that one. The tears that had been building up squeezed out from under my lids and promptly soaked Andrew's shirt.

"Because he didn't care, Ness," Andrew answered. "Lindsey said he was yelling some mean shit to her, something about never wanting her, that she makes him sick and...I don't know, Lindz, you know the rest." I had started to cry quietly and Andrew, realizing hearing those things again had hurt me once more, shushed me in my ear.

"Saying that this bitch right here told him that Bella was sending him love letters!"

"Fuck you, you little cunt!"

"I n-never sent-love-l-letters!" I sobbed out into Andrew's chest. "I never d-did. I only sent h-him 'Thinking of you' cards. Th-That's all."

"I know, baby. I know," Andrew whispered to me soothingly.

"That's it," Mom said sternly. "You better get yourself a good lawyer, Jacob. I'm pressing assault charges against you on Bella's behalf and though I don't know how yet, I'm going to go after your little fucked up girlfriend over here. I told you not to screw with my daughter but you didn't listen. Now, you're going to regret not heeding my warning, I promise you. No one messes with Bella. No one! Nick! Give me your phone! I'm calling Edward right now!"

"FUCK YOU, YOU CRAZY BITCH!"

"Cool it, Chels! Ness, listen to me for a second, alright? I didn't fucking hurt her!"

"Then why say the mean things you did to her that Lindsey says you did?"

"Because as harsh as it was, it was the truth and it needed to be said! You have no idea what's been going on since we got here. Apparently, Bella's got some sort of infatuation with me, wants me to dump Chels so she can take her place! She wrote that shit and Chels saw it! It didn't just come out of thin air! It wasn't made up! And I wouldn't have believed a word of it if I didn't see for myself what I saw today!"

I cried harder as he spoke. I thought he had finally understood just what I felt for him and had chosen to reject me before he had taken my head off outside. But instead, he had completely misunderstood. And what was worse, rather than trust that he knew me better than that, like my Jake would, he took Chelsea's word for her interpretation of everything and chose to believe that insanity instead. This hurt so much more than what he had said to me in the parking lot mere minutes ago.

"And what exactly did you see?"

"What did I see? I-I saw that Bella's not herself. She's not acting at all like she used to. She's done and said things today that I would never expect her to. That she would never do, not the Bells I know. This just isn't her. And when Chels told me about the letters, it all made sense as to why she's acting the way she's been acting and saying the things she's been saying."

Everyone fell silent; you could've heard a pin drop. I sniffled and burrowed my face further into Andrew's chest. I just wanted to disappear.

After a minute, Mom laughed, surprising all of us. "My, you are incredibly dense, Jacob. Let me ask you, did it ever occur to you that in the past few months that you've been absent that Bella has grown up and become more of the young woman she is turning out to be? That maybe her experiences have definitely changed her outlook on certain aspects of her life, including her close friendships? I think we can all agree that Bella is not who she was three months ago and that her time in Paris has done her a world of good." I heard murmured agreements. I softly pecked Andrew's chest in appreciation to his "She's amazing." He kissed the top of my head tenderly in response. "There you have it. We all have seen these changes you refer to but unlike you, none of assumed that to be a bad thing or so grossly misinterpreted her actions. Now, Jacob, allow me show you just how well you're being manipulated. Lindsey, do you remember that box you told me about and that I asked you to bring along today for Jacob's benefit since I felt he needed to know just how devastating his absence truly was for Bella? After you told me you had thought about bringing it yourself since Jake would be here? Good. Will you retrieve it from my car, please? Nick, will you help her? Thank you, darling."

"I'm manipulating him?! Are you kidding me?! I'm not the one that's got my kid all strung out over him! Let's see here! She started guzzling alcohol like it was fucking water. She tried to off herself. And now she hurts herself to make it look like Jake did it and gets her friend to lie for her? Not to mention, all of the fucking love letters she left under Jake's door recently. Oh yeah, I read all that. Talking about how she wants to basically wants to screw my boyfriend and how she wants him all to herself! I have been more understanding about this situation than most women ever would be! I've done everything I can to accept that Bella is someone important to Jake but she continues to take advantage of him and of me and now, she lies about sending him the letters I read myself, word for word, when she has another one right in her goddamn bag!"

I gasped. No, there was no way she knew about the card, unless... No! She went through my bag when I had my head turned? No! "That's not true," I cried. "Mom, that's not true. It was only a regular card, I swear!"

"I know, sweetheart. I know." I felt Mom smoothing down my hair in an attempt to calm me down. "Lindsey will be here momentarily and then we'll see who's telling the truth, okay? In the meantime, I'm going to start cleaning up these cuts, alright?" She kissed my head and then I heard her opening up the box.

"Oh, it is so fucking true, Bella! I did my best to be nice to you, to be understanding! I didn't even tell Jake when you watched us having sex that one time and that I caught you! Because I didn't want him to get upset with you! I played it off as an accident but we both know that wasn't the case, was it? I think we can all see whose hand it is that got caught in the cookie jar."

Mom laughed. "Keep talking. This is going to be impeccable for the lawsuit I'm going to file against you for emotional damages. Remember what you see here and hear today, ladies and gentlemen. This will be going on record to put this insane woman away."

"FUCK YOU! I'M NOT AFRAID OF YOU OR YOUR DADDY'S MONEY!"

Mom chuckled. "You will be." My right knee started to sting and I hissed, then whimpered. "I know, sweetheart. I know. But I have to get them clean. I'm sorry, sweetie. It won't be much longer." Had things from today not been weird enough already, I might have been shocked at Mom's nurturing yet soothing tone of voice. She was acting just like a...well...a mother. Usually, our positions were reversed. But, I was grateful to her for it, though. Very grateful.

I heard the door open again and another person walk in. "Got it," Lindsey said.

"Marvelous, Lindsey, dear. Would you mind pulling out these supposed love letters that has Jake in such distress that he felt the need to attack my seventeen year old daughter?"

"I didn't attack her, Goddammit!"

"Right. Not exactly how the courts will see it by the time Edward and I are through with you. Go ahead, Lindsey. Why look so pale, Chelsea? Could it be because your constant deception is about to be brought to light? Read it out loud, Lindsey, for all of us to hear."

_"Dear Jake, It feels like forever since I've seen you last. I got back from Paris about a week ago and I had hoped to hear from you by now but I guess you must be busy. I left you a few other notes and messages, but maybe you didn't get them? Or if you're really busy, I'm sorry. I don't mean to bother you. I just miss you. Please call me soon when you can. I miss you. Love, Bella."_

"Oh, yes that is just filled with passionate sentiments. How about another one, Lindsey dear?"

_"Dear Jake, I just got back from Paris yesterday morning. I wanted to call you as soon as I got home but the jet lag was killing me. Sorry. I know you're at work right now and I thought I'd stop by the shop but I didn't want to bother you if you were busy. I just wanted to say hi and tell you all about my trip. It was amazing and I have so many pictures to show you. It's such a beautiful city and their bookstores are wonderful. But you know me. ;) Well, call me when you can. Miss you. Love, Bella."_

"Hmm, maybe it's just me but I failed to hear any sexual intentions contained in that letter. Did anyone else hear anything sexual?"

A lot of no's resounded. "Definitely fucking not," Andrew snapped. That made me hug him tighter. Andrew rarely ever cursed and when he did, that meant he was angry. I could only imagine how angry he was after being forced to hear all of this, knowing just _how_ much I had missed Jake.

"I don't know. That was about 50/50 maybe, according to Chelsea's interpretations. Lindsey dear, how about another?"

"You're lying!" Chelsea yelled. "You've hidden the ones with all of the sexual details and scenarios she wants to get him in. Or you've written new ones! I know what I saw!

"Lindsey, would you please hand the bulk of the letters to Jacob? Thank you. Now, Jacob, you know Bella's handwriting as you do mine, is it either mine or someone else's?"

"Hers," he choked out. That made my eyes snap open. What was he getting all choked up about? Could it be that he was starting to understand just how much I missed him?

"I thought so."

"You're hiding them! I'm telling you, Jake, she's hiding them!"

Mom laughed. "Lindsey, why don't you pull out those emails you printed out for dear Jacob's benefit?"

I started to sob quietly again. I didn't want to hear this. I'd already lived through it. Wasn't that enough?

"This is dated the day after she brought the chicken soup. _'Lindz, I don't want to bother you with this but I don't know who else to talk to. I know I should just call you but I can't stop crying long enough to speak. You wouldn't understand anything I said. Yesterday, something really weird and...heartbreaking happened. Remember I told you that Jake was going to take me to see Jane Eyre and that's why you and I couldn't hang out last night? He called me and told me he had gotten sick, a touch of the flu that had gone around the shop. He was coughing and sneezing and sounded absolutely miserable. I felt bad for him after I talked to him so I made him some chicken soup. I walked over to his apartment and used my key to get in. I had also picked up some orange juice, tissues and cold medicine, you know the basics, on the way over at CVS. I didn't know if he had anything like that at his apartment. Anyway, I went to just leave it all on the kitchen counter, not wanting to bother him. I figured I'd write a note telling him how long to heat it and telling him if he needed anything else to call me, that I wouldn't mind picking up whatever he needed and bringing it to him. I heard some noises that I guess I should have been able to identify right away but like an idiot when I heard the moaning, I for some reason thought Jake was in that much pain from being sick. I went to go check on him, just to make sure he was okay when I saw something I wish I had never seen. The bedroom door was wide open and there was Jake on the bed, with Chelsea on top of him. I froze, not knowing what to think or do. I mean, here they were having sex and even though I knew I had to run, something else kept me from moving. It hit me then that Jake had lied to me in order to see her. And the thing I didn't understand was why he just didn't tell me the truth and say he wanted to see her that night? I would have been fine with rescheduling, even teasing him about wanting to get out of our plans because he hates those kinds of movies. But, no, he lied to me and that hurt. Chelsea saw me and I thought I was going to get yelled at and rightfully so. I didn't mean to stare, Lindz, I really didn't. She...well, I'm not quite sure how to describe it. She saw me and then...smirked at me. Almost like she was glad I was watching them. She started to move faster and started screaming out his name and saying really dirty things to him. He said some really dirty things back and when I saw her smirk at me again, I finally snapped out of it, left the soup and bag on the counter and got out of there. I walked back home and I thought of coming to see you but I didn't want to just show up crying on your doorstep. Especially, about this. I'll be honest, I cried the whole way home. Not only because it was obvious that Chelsea wanted me to know how much he enjoyed having sex with her but also because he lied to me. He's supposed to be my best friend, Lindz. He's not supposed to lie to me. Especially, when he knows I'll understand. I'm not the typical kid who will throw a tantrum because he wants to spend a night with his girlfriend instead of taking me to what he considers a boring movie. I feel...betrayed in a sense. Like he broke some cardinal rule. Now how do I know the next time I talk to him if he's telling the truth or lying to me again? When he tells me how he can't wait to see me, how do I know if it's the truth or a lie? What if he just thinks of spending time with me as an obligation or something worse? I'm sorry, I don't mean to go on about it. It's just...I feel almost...heartbroken. I feel like Jake is becoming someone I don't recognize, ever since he got involved with her. And the funny thing is that before yesterday, I felt bad. Like maybe I wasn't giving her a fair chance. And I should because it's not only fair but Jake deserves to be happy and if she makes him happy, then that's all that should matter. Right? But, instead, with last night, I can't think anything else but that she definitely made her position clear. I'm worried I might lose him, Lindz. I know that sounds stupid. After all, how many sixteen year olds and twenty seven year olds are best friends and stay that way? Should I just let him go since he's not a part of mine and Mom's lives anymore? Should I just let him be happy even if I know it won't make me happy? Is that too selfish? I miss him, Lindz. I do. I used to be able to talk to him about anything but now, I just feel like I can't. I want to tell him so many things that I haven't been able to because he's been so busy. Like I wanted to tell him that Andrew asked me to junior prom. Just when I didn't think I'd have a date lol. I want to tell him how excited I am (to go to a dance, yes I know this can't be me lol) and how much I like Andrew. I think if he ever met him, he'd like him, too. I want to tell him that Dad's been after me to buy me a car and how I keep dodging him with lectures of saving money and letting me get a job to save some money to get an old used car. Dad won't hear of it but I figure if I can ask Jake or Sam or one of the guys to point me in the right direction, maybe I can convince my dad to let me try. I want to tell him how it hurts to be without him sometimes here in the house, that it feels even more alone since he's been gone. I want to tell him that when I went over to Andrew's house this past week to hang out with him, Jess and Sean that he taught me how to be better at Call of Duty so I can now kick his butt lol. Andrew says with more practice I can beat Sean for sure since he's the top guy and knows what he's doing better than any of us. I don't know, I know it sounds stupid but I just miss him. Anyway, sorry for rambling on and on. I really don't mean to be a bother. Thank you for letting me talk about this to you. I just...I don't know what to think anymore. Maybe I'm overthinking it too much. I don't know. Anyway, as soon as I can speak again without bursting into tears lol, I promise I'll call you. Love you, Bella_.'"

"Jacob, what happened when Bella left you the movie tickets for The Bourne Legacy and the package of Twizzlers?"

"Wha-" He cleared his throat. "What?"

"The tickets Bella bought for you two to go see The Bourne Legacy? She said that you had been excited to learn there was a new movie coming out for the series and she wanted to take you to see it. So, she bought tickets for the midnight showing and she said she left them in your mailbox with a package of Twizzlers."

"I didn't get any...wait. No. Chels bought those tickets for us. _She_ was the one who wanted to take me to the midnight showing and _we_ went."

I started to cry into Andrew's neck again. "Please," I whimpered. "Please, Andrew, just take me home. Please." This just hurt way too much.

"I will, baby. I will. Your mom's almost done, okay? She's working on your hands right now. Once she's done, we'll go. Okay?"

I nodded, sniffling.

"Wow. It is amazing how dense you are, Jacob. I never thought you were this gullible. Go ahead, Lindsey, pull out another one."

"This is from two weeks ago. _'Hey Lindz. Everything's going great here. No complaints for the most part. Andrew and I have a date tomorrow and I'm excited. He's taking me bowling. The poor guy doesn't know what he's in for.'" _Andrew chuckled quietly. _"'But, I'll try my best not to cause any major internal injuries. Anyway, how's things by you? Can you believe we go back to school next week? Ugh. At least it's senior year. Yes, I did drop off the food at Jacob's and no I haven't heard anything back. But, I guess I'm not all that surprised anymore. He never calls me when I leave him anything, a note or something I think he'd like. I never even heard from him when I dropped off the wine, chocolate and little eiffel tower I got for him in Paris. I guess he's just really that busy, I don't know. It's fine, though. I don't know anything about wine but Dad said it was the best in all of France (according to him and Esme both) and so he bought a bottle (begrudingly since he knew it was for Jake) and brought it home with us to let me give it to Jake. I think he was a little hesitant to let me alone with it and I can't blame him but I made sure to call him after I left Jake's apartment to let him know I was okay. I don't know. I thought he might have drank some of it by now but maybe he doesn't like wine? I don't really remember him drinking it here at the house or ever seeing him drink it at all really. The chocolate I thought Jake might like because they say that their chocolate is better than ours and it's so true. Well, you know that from when you were here. Maybe he didn't get to try it yet. The little eiffel tower was just this little light up thing. It was kind of a corny gift, I guess. I just didn't know what he'd like but maybe he really didn't like it. I don't know. I wish I could have gotten him something better but the two times I called him from Paris, he never picked up and he never returned my messages. I know it's not cheap to call out of the country but I emailed him the information for a calling card I had set aside just for him. I don't know, maybe I just need to just stop hoping he'll stop this weird...silence with me and be my Jake again. I just wish I knew what I did wrong to make him angry with me, to hate me so much and not want to talk to me. Then maybe I could make up for it. At least apologize. Do you think this might be related to me accidentally seeing him and Chelsea that one night? I really didn't mean to. He used to be up front with me about everything. Even if he was angry with me. He was always the one wanting to talk and confront things, not leave them hanging. But now...I don't know. Maybe I should just forget it. I've tried my best to get in touch with him but it just doesn't seem to work. I mean, I know I told Sam that one time when I called the shop not to tell him I called but, why wouldn't he at least email me back to tell me he wouldn't call me over there? Maybe he really just wants me out of his life and it's taking me forever to take the hint. I just don't want to give up on him. But, maybe I should. But then again, Mom did say he would be at the party. So maybe there's hope yet? No clue. I love you, Lindz. Maybe I don't tell you that often enough but I do. I love you. I am so grateful to have you, Jess, Andrew, my parents, Aunt Alice and Esme. Even Nick lol. Seriously though, I'm so thankful for all of you. I don't think I would have ever pulled out of this...rut without your help. I can't wait to see you. I love you. Love, Bella.'"_

"My, by Chelsea's standards, it sounds like Bella was coming onto you awfully strong near the end there, Lindsey." I heard some laughs but none of them were Jake's.

"This is all bullshit! She's making this stuff up! Don't you all see that? What fucking wine and chocolate and eiffel tower thing? What twizzlers or movie tickets? What any of this? What food?"

"Oh, I've got the whole list right here," Lindsey offered. "Hold on! Okay, let's see, here we go. One dinner left - chicken with Jake's favorite kind of noodles and peas. One dessert left - double chocolate fudge brownies. One set of tickets left for The Bourne Legacy for the midnight opening showing. One pack of Twizzlers. One bottle of wine from France. One box of chocolates from Paris. One light up Eiffel tower miniature. One bowl of chicken soup. One bag of orange juice, tissues and cold medicine. Let's see, what else? Oh. One sleeve of pictures from Paris trip left. One disc of Paris trip left. One disc of home movies of Jake and Bella that she put together left. One new photo frame for Jake's favorite picture so he could update it. One little stuffed wolf she thought he'd like that I have been reminded was on clearance and that it was super cute so that was the only reason it was bought. Not to mention the messages that have been left on his home answering machine, including one message from," Lindsey sighed. "The night Bella unfortunately...well, that night. She had called him, it was very late, Bella thought he might be home asleep so she tried the house phone and left him a message asking him to call her back, that it was important, begging him and crying for him to talk to her. That had been right before she felt sick and well... Okay, we don't need to go into that. There's been tons of voicemails that haven't been returned and a few emails. Including the one time Bella showed up to talk to Jake before she went away to Paris and Chelsea told her that Jake wasn't home but that she would tell him she'd stopped by, telling her to have a nice trip. Oh and did I forget to mention the three greeting cards that were returned in the mail because they were refused? Or how about the two postcards Bella sent from Paris while she was there that were never responded to? Huh, Jake? Should I continue, you asshole, or have you got the fucking picture yet?"

I'd had enough and thankfully, Mom was done cleaning my cuts. I couldn't deal with this anymore. Honestly, I know Mom and Lindsey meant well but reading all of this and listing the things I'd done to try to get Jake to talk to me had done nothing more but show how pathetic I had been in my attempts. "Andrew," I whispered. "Please take me home. I can't be here anymore. I feel like I'm suffocating here. Please." I couldn't even process what would happen with Jake right now. I had to get out of there.

"Okay, baby, let's go." He got to his feet with me in his arms.

"Bella, I want you to go home and rest, alright? I'll close up the party and deal with all of this. The cake was the only thing left anyway. Andrew, please stay with her until I can get there."

"Of course, Ms. Cullen. Bella owes me another round of Monopoly anyway and I'm determined to beat her this time, free parking and all." And for the first time since this horror started, I giggled quietly.

...

**JPOV**

I watched helplessly as Andrew carried Bella out the door. I slid down to the floor, once again today, feeling like the walls were closing in on me. I felt like the biggest asshole, the biggest fucking idiot, the most gullible one. I'd fell for the oldest fucking trick in the book.

Once the door shut, Lindsey, rightfully, lost it on me. She started picking up envelopes and papers, throwing them at me as she named them. "Here you go! There's the first card telling how she's missed you! Refused! How about the second? Where she says she's sorry, she has no idea what she's done! Refused! The third asking you to please call her and just tell her if you don't want to talk to her anymore! Refused! How about these fucking emails? All of them discuss in detail exactly everything she did and how hurt she was! How about these fucking letters? That have absolutely no love or sex in them! How about you not calling her back before she fucking overdosed? Had you called her, she might not have! How can you turn around and say the mean shit you said to her out there? That she disgusts you! That she makes you so sick you want to puke! Huh?! What, nothing to say now, tough guy? How about when you scared the shit out of her by getting in her face, yelling at her and pounding on the car near her? How about when you pushed her, saw her fall and then laughed at her? Huh?! All in the name of protecting this fucking lying tramp?! And you know what else, asshole? Even after she was lying there crying, bleeding, after everything you'd done and said to hurt her yet again, when Andrew wanted to come after you and kick your ass, she begged him not to. When he wanted to get Ness to tell her what you did, she begged him not to! She was still making excuses for you! She was still convinced you weren't acting like yourself, convinced that Chelsea must have told you wrong! She still fucking cares about you and me, Andrew and her whole family don't understand why! You're nothing more than a piece of shit! She trusted you and this is what you do to her? You've made her cry nonstop these past three months! You've hurt her so fucking badly! And yet she still fucking wants you around! WHY?! And the fucking kicker of it all? SHE NEVER SAID ANYTHING OR DID ANYTHING TO DESERVE WHAT YOU DID TO HER, NOT JUST TODAY BUT EVER SINCE YOU MET THIS BITCH!"

I heard Chelsea scream at her and then Lindsey yell back. I didn't understand a word. I just sat in a mess of papers and cards and envelopes, keeping my head between my knees. I felt like the world was spinning and it wouldn't stop. I didn't even know what happened after that. The only thing I remembered was Ness crouching down beside me. "Everything in me wants to go after you for putting your hands on my daughter. But...I'm not going to press assault charges on you, Jake. From the way you look, this is punishment enough for that area. But you will never see her again. I will make sure of that. And so will her father. Just remember, you did this to yourself. No one else," she said quietly. "Chelsea might have manipulated you but she didn't have to work very hard, did she? I suppose Bella wasn't as really important to you as you insisted she was, time and time again all of these years. And now, you've willfully pushed her aside for some woman and made every word I've ever spoken come true. I was really hoping out of every man that has been in and out of Bella's life, that you would be the one to prove me wrong. God knows how that girl was certain you would. But, here we are. Good luck, Jacob. Once Edward hears of this, you're going to need it." And then she was gone.

And with her, went the little bit of my sanity I had left.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, don't kill me, lol. Look at it this way: we've hit rock bottom, we can only go up from here. ;-) For a couple of pre-readers, this next part is favorite according to what they've told me, which is the rebuild so hope that will assauge any breaking of hearts. ;-)**

**I know this chapter ending might spawn some questions so I just want to throw this out there:**

**Jake had drank more than he normally did and while he's not usually an angry drinker and he never gets aggressive like he just did, especially with Bella of all people, but the events of the day really got to him and the back and forth as well as Chelsea's constant poking at him about Bella is not helping. Does it excuse what he did? Absolutely not. He knows he messed up big time and should've gotten all the facts before going out and accusing Bella like that, never mind treating her like that. Jake's been through the wringer enough and deserves some down time which he's going to get.**

**Bella did mess with his head and is constantly hot and cold. Now, you see why she was so hurt and like I said in the previous chapter's A/N, she's been through a lot, doesn't trust easily, she and Jake formed this special bond/connection/whatever you want to call it and the first opportunity Jake gets, he bails on her. Bella didn't try to hurt herself solely because of what was going on with Jake btw. Everyone in the story thinks that but there's more to it. Jake is just a large piece of the puzzle. The next time you see her, she'll be back to the way she originally was in the story (before the first chapter of this one) and she won't be as bitter or hurt.**

**Why did Chelsea push the love letter agenda though it was obviously untrue? Simple. She saw an opening to put a permanent wedge in there between J & B and she took it. You gotta give it to her for trying lol. In her mind, she is convinced that Bella is a threat to hers and Jake's relationship. Chelsea sees that there's something there when it comes to Bella in her close friendship/relationship with Jake. She isn't that far off the mark, obviously, but she lets it take over and almost obsesses over that fact (you see it more here because obviously Jake and Bella are around each other atm). And it gets her to such a point that she sees an opening to push Jake that last inch since it looks like he might actually be free of Bella (how Chelsea sees it), opens a can of worms and it comes back to bite her in the end. She tried, swung and struck out. I don't think she was counting on Lindsey not only saving everything that had been sent out/returned to Bella but also for it to be produced right then to prove to Jake she was lying. So, she definitely took a swing and missed lol but that's why pretty much. ;-)**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: ****I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**Thank you for all of your feedback. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**BPOV**

Things had been really strange for the last few weeks since my disaster of a birthday party. From now on, every year on that day, I would make sure to lock myself up in the house, turn the phone off and just watch movies. The hell with this 'hey, let's celebrate' thing. It only led to disaster where I was concerned.

It turns out that I had just twisted my ankle badly that day in the parking lot. I had been lucky with those shoes and the way I fell. I had limped around for a while but was doing much better. My cuts had healed a while ago so I was pretty much back to being one hundred percent.

Andrew had stayed by my side. I think he and everyone were afraid I would relapse or fall back into the same pattern but I had learned my lesson; I would never make that mistake again. I was sad; I wouldn't lie. But more so that I wished things hadn't gone so badly that day. As far as Jake went, I didn't have any regrets there.

Remembering all of the things he had said to me, like Andrew and Lindsey had constantly reminded me, no matter how angry he might have been, whether he had a right to be or not, he had no right to say some of the mean stuff he'd come out with. Lindsey had told me about his helpless reaction after Andrew had taken me home, only after I'd begged her. Lindsey had left all of those papers and everything with him after apparently throwing it all at him.

Unfortunately, for him, he'd done this to himself. I'd never been to blame. That had all been him and Chelsea, but even more so him than her because he let her do these things. But that was on him. As for me, I'd moved on.

Mom had Dad had not been kidding when they'd said they would make sure he'd never see me again. They had been fully set to go ahead and get a restraining order against him, prohibiting him from being anywhere near me or contacting me. Dad had also wanted to press assault charges against him but thankfully Mom and Esme had talked some sense into him and he didn't. I had to practically beg Mom and Dad not to go for the restraining order. I made some changes to show them I would stay away from Jake. I changed my cell phone number, shut down my email address and opened a new one, I had even kicked him off of my Facebook (which he never really went on anyway) and I had given Sam his apartment key to give back to him along with a box of everything he had ever given me or bought for me, including my laptop. Dad made sure to buy me a new one so I couldn't argue on giving that back. I was still allowed to speak to Sam, the guys and Jake's family but they were all to understand that if they helped Jake get in touch with me or see me that they would be held liable. It was embarrassing when Dad had his lawyer make those phone calls and I apologized to Sam when he came to get Jake's things. He just said that after everything that had happened, he understood and didn't blame Mom and Dad for wanting to protect me. When I asked him if Jake was okay, he just smiled wanly at me and said, "He will be." He didn't elaborate and I didn't press him further. So, basically, anytime I went to the shop, if Jake was working, Sam or one of the guys was to order me to leave or Jake to leave. Either way, we were not to see each other. In order to keep things from getting any worse, I steered clear of Sam's shop as much as possible. I didn't want that situation to have to happen. Not only would it be unfair to put the guys in that position, but it was also unfair to Jake. That was his place of work. How wrong would it be to make him leave, possibly lose out on pay just because he couldn't see me and I had stopped by to say hi to Sam and the others?

For the most part, I spent my time with Andrew and the girls. School kept me mostly busy and the other times, I was at work. I had gotten an after school job at a small bookstore in town. I loved it. Surrounded by that many books and allowed to read when it was slow? I couldn't be happier.

Andrew would take me out on Friday nights and he even took me down to the city to see The Phantom Of the Opera with the tickets Jake had bought me. I had wanted to send them back but Mom had talked me into going, saying it was an experience and I could still enjoy it with Andrew. And I had. There was one point I did miss him during that night. When something that seemed just like Jake would remark on and make fun of, earning him a smack to the arm, I missed him then. But the feeling was gone as soon as I reminded myself why he wasn't there with me right then.

I had to admit, there were still times I would miss Jake. After all he'd done, I still missed him and still cared about him. I only ever told Esme anymore. Dad and Mom didn't want to hear it and frankly, neither did Lindsey, Jess or even Andrew anymore. They couldn't understand how I could still miss someone who had been as cruel as he had. Esme said she understood why but she also understood their reservations about him. Esme and I talked on the phone a lot more that fall than we ever had before.

But, through everything, I did my best to keep my mind occupied so no thoughts of Jake or what had led to him being removed from my life forever leaked in. And then after a while, the thoughts became less and less until there were none. For that, I was immensely grateful.

Until I was forcefully reminded of the hole currently residing in my heart. It was the end of October and Halloween was in the next week. It was a Tuesday night and I was alone in the store. My manager, Scott, had gone on his dinner break and when he came back, I would be done for the night. I was restocking some shelves and I had just finished, stepping behind the desk and unpacking a box when the door's bells jingled, signaling a customer had walked in. How I hated those things but Scott would not get rid of them no matter how much I begged him to.

I laid the new books back into the box, glancing at the clock. It was five minutes until Scott would be back and considering how dead it'd been, I knew it was him. I wiped my hands on my jeans and started to walk to the register. "Well, well. Five minutes early this time. That must be some kind of new rec-"

Jake was standing about twenty feet away. "Hey," he said softly. He looked horrible. He hadn't shaved in what looked like weeks so he definitely had thick scruff. He needed a haircut, even with his ballcap on it was obvious. He had deep dark circles under his eyes and it also looked like he had lost a little bit of weight. He wasn't as fit as he used to be, as tight. And he actually looked like he had lost some...color, I didn't know how to describe it. He almost looked sickly. It broke my heart to see but I had to put my foot down.

"You can't be here," I said just as softly, afraid if I said it any louder, it would make him break apart with how frail he looked. "I'm not supposed to see you. My manager will be back in five minutes and then I'll be gone. You can come back for your book then."

He gave me a sad little smile. Even his smiles seemed devoid of the life they used to have. "I'm not here for a book."

"Then what are you doing in a bookstore?"

He sighed and moved closer to the desk. His eyes were still the same dark color but almost seemed flat in a way. And they were bloodshot, almost as if he hadn't slept in a few days. "I needed to see you."

"How did you even know I work here?"

"You? A bookstore in town? A small one? Not hard to guess. Plus your car's always outside."

I glared at him. "Have you been stalking me?"

"No, I pass this place on my way to work and back. I...I tried to...I tried to see you at the house when you were the only one home but...I didn't think you'd want to see me."

"Well, you were right." I saw that that hurt him and I felt bad. I didn't want to hurt him. Didn't he understand that I was trying to keep him from having charges pressed against him as well as having a restraining order filed? If Dad found out he was here... "I'm supposed to call the police if you show up. It's orders. I'd rather not so can you please just go? My manager will be here any minute and he'll see you."

"I'll go on one condition."

I sighed. "What?"

"You come see me. You pick the day, the time, the place, how long you stay but you see me." He looked at me pleadingly. "Please."

"Jake, you know I can't. It's not just you they're keeping an eye on."

"You can meet me somewhere. Tell them you're going to the store or something. Get a friend to cover for you. Something. Please."

"What about 'I can't' can you not understand? My schedule is air tight. If it's not Mom keeping tabs on me, it's Andrew or the girls. They've even got Scott, my manager, in on it, too. Even Nick sometimes. I can't see you. I'm not supposed to."

"Well, then can you call me?"

I shook my head. "I can't."

"Please. I want to talk to you. Why can't I talk to you?"

"You know why."

"I've tried to email you but it keeps coming back saying your email address doesn't exist. I saw that you took me off of Facebook and I can't message you that way. I've tried your phone half a dozen times but it keeps saying it's disconnected. I've waited for you to come to Sam's though he doesn't know it so I could run out and see you quickly. How else am I supposed to get in touch with you?"

"You're not," I said as softly as possible.

I saw his eyes start to glisten and it killed me. He shook his head, frowning down at the counter between us. "I can't sleep. I can barely eat. All I do is go to work, go home, go to bed and get up the next morning to do it all over again. I can't think straight. I can barely concentrate on work. All I do is think about you and how much I want to see you, to talk to you. Just once." He lifted his glassy eyes to mine. "I read everything. Read it all and I...I know you'll never forgive me. I don't want you to, I don't deserve it. But...please, can't you just let me see you once? Please?"

"Jake...I don't think-"

The door's bells jingled again. I looked up and saw Scott coming in. I saw Jake watching me out of the corner of my eye. I grabbed a book from underneath the counter and put it between us. "Ah, and here I was hoping you'd surprise me today." I looked up at the clock. "Three minutes late this time! What is that?"

"Sure, bust my chops. It's not my fault they took forever to get the food out."

I laughed. "A likely story. Did you bring me any fries this time?"

Scott glanced up looking very much like a deer in headlights. "Oh, I, uh..."

I shook my head, snickering. "Oh, boy. Alright. I'll let it go this time. But you are docked three cookies tomorrow and will be one for every minute of every day that you're late and don't bring me fries. Let that be a lesson to you."

"Oh, man. I forgot. It's cold out there!"

I rolled my eyes. "If you had brought me fries, it would've kept your hands warm."

"Smartass," he muttered. I grinned sweetly at him as he walked past us into the back. "Why don't you finish up that sale and then come in the back? I gotta go over tomorrow's order with you and we need to have a cookie conversation."

I laughed again. "A cookie conversation? That's a new one. What'll it be this time? Chocolate chip or oatmeal cinnamon?"

"Perhaps both if you keep talking and costing me overtime."

I shrugged, looking at my nails. "Last time I checked you had to be full-time to get overtime. I'm not worried. Save your threats."

"I might add brownies to that list."

"Ooo, we're dreaming big this evening. Alright, fine. You got me. I shall finish up here and head straight into the back for our cookie conversation. Be there in a minute."

He grumbled as he walked straight into the back. "Smartass," he grumbled.

I bit my lip, waiting until he had left and turned back to Jake. He was smiling warmly at me. I glued my eyes to the counter. "I kept him distracted but it won't last long. You need to go."

"Say you'll see me."

I sighed angrily and lifted my eyes to him. "If I agree to this once, will you promise to leave it alone after that?" He gave me a nod. I sighed again and pulled the book from the counter closer to me. "I should be out of here by 7:30. I'll meet you at the Starbucks down the road. We can get a booth in the back, I guess, away from the windows."

"7:30, got it." He covered my hand gently with his own. "Thank you."

I did the best to ignore all the tingles assaulting my body that his touch brought back. I just nodded and went back to the side of the counter, grabbing the box I had been unloading before he came in. I moved it to the floor and crouched down, gathering books in my arms. I heard the bells and I straightened up, looking around. He had left. I sighed in relief and rubbed my eyes tiredly. Tonight was gonna be a tough one for sure.

...

I saw the back of him from the door, sitting in the farthest booth in the the back against the wall. I quickly walked over, trying not to have a panic attack. I sat down across from him only to find him with a coffee and a frozen one. He started pushing the latter towards me. "You still like these, right?" He asked almost timidly.

"I stopped drinking them last summer," I murmured.

His face fell. "Oh. Well, if you want, you can have my coffee then. I haven't touched it." The look on his face was killing me. He was hurting but he was trying to make me happy in his own small way.

"No, that's okay. I'll take the other one. Been missing them anyway. So...thank you." I took it from him and opened the straw, sticking it into the drink. I sipped it and fumbled with my keys in my hand. "So, what, um...did you want to talk about?"

His eyes were glued to his coffee in his hands. "Honestly," he nearly whispered. "I don't know where to begin."

I placed my keys and elbows on the table and clasped my hands in front of my mouth, patiently but nervously waiting.

"I know this in no way takes back anything I've done or said, but I am so sorry."

I lowered my eyes to his coffee as well.

"You don't know how much I wish I could go back and change all of this. What I wouldn't give to take back everything I did to you."

"You can't," I whispered.

"I know. And I hate that. I hate myself for not being fair to you, for not trusting you, for ever stepping away from you. You're everything to me, Bella. You always were. But...I messed up. So badly. And I hurt the one person I'd never ever want to hurt." His voice started to choke up but he cleared his throat quietly. "I know I've gotta live with the consequences, I get that but I had to see you to tell you that I never hated you, I never pulled away from you because of something you did. It was never you."

I didn't say anything, just kept listening to him. He obviously needed to get all of this off his chest.

"And that day in the parking lot," His voice choked up again. "I will never forgive myself for what I said to you, did to you. There's no excuse. I lost my mind and I think about it everyday, wishing I could go back and keep you from falling. I really never meant to make you fall down and get hurt." I rubbed my forehead with one hand. "I am just so sorry," he whispered.

Another minute of silence passed.

"I miss you, you know. I think I must have read everything you've written about a million times by now. The cards, the letters, even the emails." He sniffled. "I got the discs and pictures back. They weren't thrown out like everything else. I guess they were hidden because I'd see them in the garbage and know something was up, I don't know. The one of us in the home videos was pretty cool to watch." He chuckled nervously. "Brought back a lot of memories."

"Home movies have a way of doing that," I murmured.

"I liked watching the one when you were in Paris. You looked really happy there."

I nodded once, fiddling with my straw. "I was."

"Were you able to go see the play?"

"Andrew went with me."

"He didn't fall asleep, did he?" He teased.

I wanted to tease back but for some reason, I just...couldn't. "No, he didn't," I answered quietly.

"Did you enjoy it?" I nodded. "Good. I'm glad you got to go."

More silence passed.

"Bells." My eyes snapped up to his and he smiled at me sadly. "You don't have to stay here if you don't want to. I just wanted to see you. And make sure you knew that."

I didn't move, I just stared at him.

He cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I, uh, I'm gonna head to the bathroom quick." He got up, keeping his gaze on the floor. "If you...aren't here when I get back, I'll understand and thank you for giving me the chance to talk to you one last time." He sighed sadly. "I love you, Bells," he whispered. "Always will." He didn't look at me and turned, disappearing into the back.

I should have gotten up and left. He had given me the perfect exit without any discomfort or awkwardness or hurt for either side. But, instead, I found myself still sitting there when he returned three minutes later.

He looked just as suprised as I felt. "Hey. I thought you'd probably be gone when I got back."

"Oh, well, if you want me to leave." I started to get up.

"No," he said desperately. "No. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry."

I watched him as I sat back down. "I was just teasing," I whispered.

He dropped his eyes to his coffee, smiling sheepishly. "Oh. Sorry."

I shrugged and went back to fiddling with my straw. He didn't look up at me as he sipped his coffee. "So, are you, I mean, are you okay? Other than what you told me, I mean?" I asked softly.

He lifted his eyes to mine. "Yeah. I'm getting there. How about you?"

I bit my lip and sat back against the chair. "Okay."

More silence.

"So."

He smiled wanly at me. "So."

"A guy, a rabbi and a baby walk into a bar."

"Okay." I didn't say anything. "Is there more to this joke or am I supposed to do some sort of fill in the blanks thing here?"

I shrugged. "I don't remember the joke. I thought you'd come up with something better."

He chuckled. "You were always bad at telling jokes."

"I was not bad. The people who told them to me always told them poorly, namely you."

He snorted. "Right."

"Okay. Then you tell one, Jokemaster. Go ahead."

He chuckled again. "Jokemaster? Seriously?" I nodded. "Okay, a preist, a rabbi and a nun walk into a bar."

"And?"

"Ouch."

I burst out laughing. He laughed with me. I shook my head. "Thank you for proving me right."

He shrugged, sipping his coffee. "I tried."

"I'll give you that," I chuckled.

Things were quiet again.

I bit my lip. "I should go," I said softly.

He nodded, staring at his coffee. "Yeah. I should, too."

I nodded myself and got up. He followed me out the door and we were about to go our separate ways.

"Thanks for the coffee."

"Sure." He bit his bottom lip. "Thanks for talking to me."

I shrugged. "Sure."

He looked like he wanted to say something more but seemed to decide against it. "So...take care of yourself."

I smiled wanly. "You, too."

He nodded. "Ah, okay. Take care."

"You, too." I started to walk away, trying to ignore the ripping sensation I felt and the pain radiating throughout my chest.

"Bella!"

I spun around quickly, my heart pounding. "Yeah?"

"Look, if...if you ever need anything, help with something or just someone...to talk to, the door's always open. It'll never close."

I smiled sadly. "Thank you." He nodded and I sighed. "Please eat some more. And get some sleep. And- Please just take care of yourself. Okay?"

He smiled just as sadly at me. "Okay."

I stared at him a moment longer and then turned around, heading towards my car.

I got into it and dropped my head into my hands. I had done it; I'd survived the closure meeting with Jake. Now, why the hell did it feel so wrong to be letting him go?

...

**JPOV**

"Jake! You got that Taurus almost finished?"

"Yeah. Got about twenty more minutes and she'll be good to go."

"Alright. Then finish her up and come in here for a minute."

I rolled my eyes where Sam couldn't see. "Alright," I called over my shoulder.

I knew Sam meant well but truthfully, I was getting a little tired of these check-on-Jake sessions at least three times a week.

Twenty minutes later, I rapped on his office door. "Come on in." I opened the door, stepped in and closed it, sitting down as I wiped my hands on a dirty rag. "What's up?"

"You tell me."

My eyes narrowed. Please tell me that Edward fucking Masen wasn't about to be breathing down my neck. "What do you mean?"

"Well, is there any reason Bella's sitting outside in her car right now?"

My jaw dropped and I jumped up. "She's here?"

"Whoa. Jake. Come on. You know the rules."

"Screw the rules, Sam. What if something happened? What if she's hurt?" I grabbed the knob.

"Relax. If that's the case, one of us will find you and tell you after helping her. I seriously doubt that's it, though."

"How the hell would you know? You're sitting in here all calm and collected when she could be bleeding or having a seizure or something."

Sam rolled his eyes, sighing. "Relax. I checked on her. She's just sitting there, talking on the phone."

I held up a hand to my chest. "Thank Christ. What the hell? Are you trying to give me a fucking heart attack?"

"No. I just wonder why all of a sudden she's showing up. She hasn't been here since this whole thing went down."

I sighed, shrugging. "Wouldn't know."

Sam gave me a look that told me he wasn't buying it.

I sighed again. "I talked to her last night. I went to the place she works at," I mumbled.

"Are you trying to get arrested?"

"What? I don't have a restraining order against me."

"Yet."

"Yeah, well, fuck that asshole. I get he's just protecting her but that's fucking ridiculous. It's up to Bella whether she wants to talk to me or not. Not him."

Sam sighed. "Okay, you know what? If you want to keep pushing it, that's your business. But not here. You know the drill. She's here so you gotta take a ride."

I groaned. "Sam, come on. That's not fucking fair."

"Sorry. Rules are rules. Jake, you know I'd do whatever I could to help you but I can't put my business in jeopardy just so you can talk to the girl. Come on."

I sighed angrily. "What if I disappear into the back and stay there until she leaves?"

"Jake..."

"Come on, Sam. I get what you're saying but get what I'm saying, too. I shouldn't have to fucking leave just because Daddy Dearest doesn't want me within a hundred feet of her. There's no fucking restraining order in place. No one's breaking the law."

"It doesn't matter. You heard the guy. He'll sue the fucking garage, Jake! I can't afford that! Come on. Don't put me in this position. I know it's fucked up, okay? I get it. But you can't ask me to put not only my business on the line but all these guys' paychecks. That's not fair to them or me."

"Then just let me go in the fucking back! How the fuck will he know if she doesn't see me?"

Sam scowled at me.

"Well?" I held my hands up.

"Fine. But you stay out there until she leaves. Don't even think about trying to pull any shit. You do and I'll fucking call Masen myself."

I scoffed. "Yep. Thanks." I opened the door and slammed it shut. I understood Sam's point but still... Ah, it wasn't his fault. It was all fucking Edward fucking Masen's fault. Rich, spoiled, egotistical motherfucker.

I sighed tiredly and went out into the shop, not before looking out the office windows and seeing Bella's car was indeed there. I didn't see her in it, though. That must mean she's on her way inside. I sighed one more time and stepped out the door. Funnily enough, there was Bella, right outside the bays. Yeah, I could have gone back out into the office and headed towards the back that way but I didn't feel like it. I worked here, Goddammit! Fuck Masen!

I started downstairs and I could hear the guys all thanking Bella. Sure enough, she nearly had a whole table's worth of food sitting wrapped up on an old work bench that we used to hold random shit like lunches and personal stuff.

She shrugged, smiling. "No problem." She had her hair down in soft curls and this time she was wearing some sort of designer jeans or something, shoes and some sweater that actually complimented her really well. She looked great. I could see Adam checking her out and I rolled my eyes. The guy had it bad for her, seriously. He never made a move and he better fucking never. Adam was near my age and no way was he touching on Bella. But, I couldn't stop him from looking. No matter how many times I'd threatened him to cut it out, glared at him, punched him in his arm as I passed, he never stopped. Eventually, I had to let it go but I made sure Bella knew as did he, Adam made one move and he would fucking regret it.

Bella smiled. "Okay, you guys are set. I have to run so I'll see you guys soon, okay?" They all thanked her again and waved. "Hey, Jared, can I talk to you for a second, please?"

I hurried past the bays in the front rather than the back so I wouldn't be seen by her and since the guys were distracted, they didn't see me, either. I came up on the side of my bay, the last one and crouched next to the Taurus I had just finished, keeping out of sight.

"What's up, Bella?"

"Hey. Sorry to bother you, but I was kind of wondering if you could maybe do me a favor?"

"Yeah, sure. Whaddya need?"

She started to wring her hands nervously. "Um, I know Jake's working today and I don't want to keep him away from here for long. But...can you please just make sure he eats something? I tried to make some of his favorites as well as yours and well...I'm worried about him. He seems like he's not eating."

"You saw him?"

Shit. "Only from a distance. I had passed the shop the other day hoping to stop by but I saw him outside talking to a customer so I didn't because I didn't want to interrupt his work." Good save, Bella. "He looked thinner than the last time I saw him and he seemed...tired."

"Sure, no problem. When he gets back, I'll tell him to take lunch. He hasn't taken it yet."

"Not yet? But it's almost three."

"Yeah. He just tends to lose track of time when he's working. But, no worries. I'll tell him."

"Thanks, Jared. I appreciate it."

"Sure thing. Thanks again for the food. I gotta hurry up and finish this Honda so I can dig in myself. It's good to see you, Bella. We've missed you around here."

"I've missed you guys, too. I'll try to stop by again next week."

"Okay, great. See you then."

"Bye."

I saw her turn around to leave and that's when I made my move. "Psst!"

She spun around and her eyes widened when she saw me. She glanced at the guys and then shook her head. I inclined my head towards the back and slipped around the corner. She nervously followed me a minute later. "Jake, I'm not supposed to be here when you are."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, I know. But unless your dad's got a satellite tracking you, we should be fine."

She bit her lip, looking anxious. "Okay. Well, what's up?"

I smiled. "I just wanted to say hi and thanks for the food."

"Oh, um, you're welcome." She blushed. "Just figured you guys might be hungry and I haven't been here in a while, so..." She crossed her arms and glanced around.

I decided I'd had enough of this awkwardness. She could push me away if she wanted to but right now, I was going for that hug I wanted to give her last night. While she was looking away, I approached her and put my arms around her. She stiffened but didn't push me off. That was progress right there.

I sighed and hugged her tighter. "I miss you. I really do."

I felt her trembling slightly but before I could ask her what was wrong, she whispered, "I miss you, too."

She pulled away after a minute. "Jake," She shook her head looking up at me. "You need to understand that I don't trust you. You destroyed whatever chance you had of me trusting you like I used to that day in the parking lot. I can't do that again, I'm sorry. I can't go through that kind of pain one more time."

I nodded sadly. "No, I know. I get it. Believe me, I do. I know I deserve so much worse. I can't help missing you, though."

She sighed. "I can't promise that I'll ever trust you like that again. That was sort of a...blind faith I guess you could say. But I seriously doubt I'll ever feel like that about you again."

I nodded again. "I know," I whispered, gazing at the ground.

"But...if you're really serious and you mean it and you really want to be friends again, then...you have to earn the trust back, even if it's not the same." My eyes snapped up to hers, shocked. She sighed again. "But if I even think there's a slim chance of you doing that to me again, whether it's a new girlfriend you're infatuated with or by you saying horrible things to me like that again or hurting me physically, then it's done. For good." She took a deep breath and waited a minute. "So, what are you thinking?" She whispered to me.

I put my hands in my pockets and sat down onto one of the tire piles we used as seats out here. "Honestly? I'm thinking I don't deserve the chance after everything I've done to you but...I am thankful for it all the same. It really means a lot that you'd be willing to try again," I ended in a whisper.

She stared at me. "Whether I like it or not, for some reason, you're a part of me. And I don't work right when you're not there." My eyes widened slightly. "I'm not saying that to sound like some crazy person. I just mean that you're important to me." She blushed again, looking away once more.

"No. I don't think that at all. I was surprised because I actually think the same thing a lot, especially recently." Her eyes snapped back to mine. "I don't work right without you, either. And I think that's been proven a lot this past year."

She nodded. "Yeah," she said sadly. She ran a hand through her hair worriedly. "I have to go. Just...promise me you'll eat something and try to get some sleep tonight."

I smiled and nodded. I then held out my hand to her. After a moment's hesitation, she took it. I gently pulled her into a hug, closing my eyes and enjoying the moment and how right it felt to have her back here in my arms. "I love you, Bella," I whispered.

She sighed. "I love you, too." And then a minute later, "Please, Jake, for the love of God, don't make me regret this. I can't take you breaking my heart again. There's very little of it left as it is." She ended that statement on a broken whisper.

I hugged her tighter to me, truly hating myself in that moment, worse than all the other times in the past month and a half. "I won't." I kissed the side of her head. "I promise," I whispered back to her, just as brokenly.

I'd never be fool enough to hurt her again.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: ****I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**************I know this one is short but the next one will be longer. ;-)**

**Thank you so much for all of your incredible feedback. Really. =) And thank you to all of you who are faving and following the story, here and on Tricky Raven. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**BPOV**

I couldn't believe I was doing this to myself again. I just hoped that I wouldn't regret it.

Jake and I began to meet up after every one of my shifts for a half an hour at Starbucks. We started easing back into a friendship, though with more reservations from me this time. I didn't mean to be so guarded but...I just couldn't completely relax around him.

When the week of Halloween came, he told me that Jared, John and Adam were having a party that Friday night. Jess was having one that night, too, and I was supposed to go with Andrew. I told Jake I'd try to make it but I couldn't make any promises. He simply smiled and gave me a hug before heading back to his car.

Predictably, I told Andrew I'd meet him at Jess' party a bit late. Being the understanding and amazing boyfriend he is, he had smiled and said he'd see me there, to call him if I changed my mind and needed a ride.

Like an idiot, I pulled up to the house the three guys were renting and had to park down the block. I hadn't bothered dressing up this year, the same as last year and the year before that. I wasn't crazy about costumes. So, I just dressed up nicely, left my hair down in a different style of curls than normal, almost as if I was going to a club, and wore heels. Yes, I had been getting more and more used to them as time went on. I had sharpened the eye make-up a bit and left it at that.

I had my clutch in my hand, locked the car and started walking up the block. Some people were hanging outside on the way and this one group of morons thought they'd be pretty funny and whistle as I walked by, making comments. They were drinking and I just rolled my eyes and walked past them.

"Come on, baby! Come back here and shake that ass for me!"

I rolled my eyes again and kept walking. Benjamin Franklin and his pals. Okay, I'd have to remember them and steer clear. Right before I got to the steps, I was grabbed and spun around, coming face to face with good ol' Ben. "Hey," he slurred. "You don't just walk away without coming over to say hello. That's rude."

I pushed him away from me and he stumbled back, his friends catching him. "The only way I want to see you Ben is on a hundred dollar bill. Otherwise, thanks but I'll pass." I went to turn when he grabbed me again, this time harder.

"You want to be paid? Why? When it looks like you'll just give it up for free?" His friends laughed.

"Hey!" I heard Jake yell behind me up the steps and near the front door. Ben's friends started backing away as I heard Jake working his way past people to get to us. Ben stood there, stupidly staring at me. "You want something for free?" I asked huskily, looking at him flirtatiously.

"You know it," he slurred, moving in way too close. I could smell the alcohol on his rancid breath as it washed over me.

"Okay," I said sexily. I moved in as if to kiss him and then I kneed him right in the groin. He cried out in pain, bending over. I shoved him and he fell onto the sidewalk onto the ground on his back, crying out in pain again before curling up and grabbing his crotch. I stood over him. "I don't know about you, Ben, but that was good for me," I said in that same sexy tone. "Let me know if you want some more and I'll be more than happy to give it to you." My eyes snapped up to his friends who were watching with wide-eyed expressions and mouths agape. "Would you boys like a little taste?" They didn't say anything. "Didn't think so. Keep it clean. You never know what just might happen to your junk when you flash it around like that. Morons." I spun around to find Jake behind me, staring at me in shock.

"Hey," I smiled. I took his hand and started leading him back up to the house, ignoring all the people laughing as Ben's friends helped him up. "I don't have a lot of time so let's go." He let me pull him around without any protest.

A few minutes later, Jake found us a quiet corner in the kitchen to sit down. He was dressed in his work uniform with his hat on backwards, like always. The house was packed and the noise of the crowd was loud. Between music in one room where people danced and other people all over, there wasn't a drop of silence in the house anywhere. The kitchen was the quietest we'd get without going upstairs. And I was glad Jake had thought to bring us to the former instead.

He found a can of Coke Zero in the fridge and handed it to me, grabbing an empty cup and placing it in front of me. "You guys drink this?"

He smirked and shrugged. "I picked it up in case you were coming by. I had to hide it from all the other girls so enjoy it."

I laughed and opened the can. "Thank you." I poured some and he held out his beer bottle. "Cheers." Jake had told me he still had a few beers here and there but he never consumed as much as he had that day; he would never chance making the same mistake again.

I grinned. "Cheers." I then toasted him and took a sip.

"So, uh," he chuckled uncertainly. "The guy out there..."

"Who? Oh, Ben?" I shrugged and took another sip, watching a sexy vampiress trying to catch Jake's attention from a few feet away. He didn't look her way once. "He had it coming," I continued distractedly. "That's what he gets for basically calling me a whore."

He frowned at his bottle and sipped his beer. "I'm walking you out to the car when you leave."

I chuckled. "Jake, don't worry. I can take care of myself."

"I'm sure you can but there's group of them and only one of you. Besides, it'll make me feel better."

I smirked. "Are you sure you don't want _me_ walking _you_ to _your_ car?"

He glared up at me and I laughed. He shook his head and inclined his head towards me. "You look nice tonight."

I smiled. "Thanks. I didn't really feel like dressing up. This was about as far as I was willing to go. Nice costume you've got there, by the way."

He chuckled. "Yeah, I wasn't really feeling the whole dressing up thing, either. Besides, I figured if I covered myself with oil stains, it'd keep the ladies at bay."

I shook my head, laughing. "You do know, Mr. Egotistical, that some women actually prefer to get down and dirty?" I nodded in the pouting vampiress' direction.

He glanced towards her, shrugged in an uninterested fashion, turned and smirked cockily at me. "Oh, I know." I rolled my eyes and he laughed.

I stared at my drink a minute. "You know, not every woman is like Chelsea." I lifted my eyes up towards his. "Or my mom or the Emily you knew." What prompted me to say that I would never know.

His face crumbled and he dropped his eyes to the table. "I know," he said quietly.

I covered his left hand with my right one. "There are good women out there. You shouldn't close yourself off. Not completely." I squeezed his hand and then released him, sitting back in my chair and recrossing my legs. Why on earth was I still talking?

His eyes slowly lifted to mine and he gave me a small smile. "I know." He stared at me for a minute before someone said my name.

Our heads snapped to the side and there was Adam standing next to us, wearing jeans, a black button up shirt and a black leather jacket. He looked good. I smiled. "Hey, Adam."

He smiled shyly at me. "Hey, Bella. You look beautiful."

I bit my lip, smiling just as shyly and blushing. "Thank you. You look very handsome yourself."

He smiled wider. "Thanks. I was wondering...would you...dance with me?"

I went to speak when Jake cut me off. "There's no other women in the place, Adam?" He asked nastily.

I turned to see Jake glaring up at him. I scoffed and shook my head. I then smiled brightly at Adam. "I'd love to. Jake won't mind keeping an eye on my drink, would you, Jake?" I snapped. Jake looked at me in shock as I stood up, glaring at him. I then smiled at Adam as he held out his hand and I took it, letting him lead me into the room where the music was blasting.

...

**JPOV**

I watched Bella leave with Adam in shock. Was she kidding me? I sighed angrily and picked up her cup and bag, following them into the other room. No way was I being left as the purse and drink bitch. Not even for her.

Thankfully, a slow song had come on before they started dancing so Adam had no choice but to take her hand in his and wrap one arm around her waist while she laid her right hand on his left shoulder. They talked a bit and Bella smiled warmly at him whenever he looked nervous or was smiling shyly when she said something.

I sipped my beer, watching Bella as she moved, thinking back to what she had said before. She had amazed me before with her selflessness. After everything she had been through, that I helped Chelsea to put her through, she was still telling me to stay open and that a good woman would come along. Little did she know that I had already found one.

...

**BPOV**

Adam was so cute. I knew he had a crush on me, as adorable as it was considering he was nearly ten years older than me. He was a sweet guy and I hated it when the other guys gave him a hard time, especially Jake. Adam never overstepped his bounds with me, he knew I had a boyfriend and he never looked at me the same way other men did. He seemed to see me and not my body.

As he shyly told me about how he was taking an art class at the community college, I smiled at him and kissed his cheek, telling him how proud of him I was. His cheeks darkened and he thanked me, asking if he could show me his drawings sometime. I smiled wider and said I'd love to see them. And again, unlike the typical guy, he didn't ask me to go up to his room to check them out right then. Instead, he said he'd bring them to the shop for the next time I stopped by. I kissed his cheek again just for being so sweet and a complete gentleman before laying my head against his as we moved.

When the song ended, I thanked him for the dance. He smiled and nodded, saying he'd see me later and that he would be nearby if I needed him for anything. I thanked him once more and he smiled again, leaving as Jake came to stand in front of me. Once Adam was completely gone, my smile dropped and I glared up at Jake.

"What did I do wrong?"

I placed my hands on my hips and glared more intensely at him. Was he serious?

He sighed. "Bells, you can't expect me to be okay with him checking you out all the time." When I didn't respond, he glared back at me. "It's not happening. So, don't give me that look." When I still didn't say anything, he sighed. "I'm only looking out for you, you know."

I smacked his shoulder and pointed at him. "Be nice to him, Jacob. He's not a bad guy and so what if he has a crush on me? It's cute."

His jaw dropped. "Cute? Did I just hear you right?"

I smirked and crossed my arms. "Yep. And I also believe you heard me tell you to be nice to him. Let's not forget, you're on probation, Mister. Consider this part of the terms set forth." I arched a brow, daring him to refute me. I wasn't really trying to give him a hard time but I hated how mean he was to Adam at times.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me," he growled.

I glared at him and slapped his shoulder again. "I mean it."

He sighed angrily. "I'll cut him some slack but the minute I see him making an inappropriate move or-"

"You'll make him regret ever laying eyes on me. Yes, I know." I sighed myself. "Can we move on now?"

He smirked. "Only if you dance with me."

I rolled my eyes. "If I must." I then smirked at him to let him know I was teasing. I took my clutch from him and wrapped my arms around his neck as he slipped his arms around my waist. It was a song that wasn't exactly fast but had a slow sensual beat that we should have been grinding to. I didn't feel up to it and it seemed he didn't, either. Instead, he laid his head against mine, just like I had with Adam, but held me much closer than the latter had.

"You know, I have to agree with Adam on one thing," he murmured into my ear.

"What's that?"

"You do look beautiful tonight."

I couldn't help but smile. "Thank you."

...

**JPOV**

It felt amazing to be able to hold her this close again. I closed my eyes, inhaling her familiar scent along with whatever perfume or spray she was wearing; it actually mixed well together and enhanced how good she smelled. I missed her, I really did.

The song was coming to an end and I really didn't want to let her go but I forced myself to. I went to smile down at her when I noticed she had opened up her bag and was quickly rifling through it. She pulled her phone out and cursed under her breath, hurrying away from me back towards the kitchen. What the hell? I followed her and saw her pick up the call, her back to me and the doorway.

"Hey." The way she said the greeting had me frowning; it had to be Andrew on the other end. "I was just getting ready to leave. Yeah. I should be there in about...twenty minutes? Yeah. Does Jess need me to pick up anything before I head over? No? Okay, babe. I'll see you in a little bit. Love you, too. Bye."

I was frowning down at the floor, my hands in my pockets. Babe? Love you, too? That just depressed me more than I'd already been depressed this last month and a half. Then again, Bella was giving me a second chance. I should be happy about that in itself.

She turned around to face me, biting her lip. "Hey. I'm sorry, Jake, but I'm gonna have to cut out earlier than I thought I would."

I nodded once. "I kind of figured." I gave her a wan smile.

She stepped up to me. "I'm really sorry. I wish I could stay longer."

I shrugged, trying to affect a laidback demeanor though it couldn't be further from the truth. "It's fine. You came and I got to see you, even dance with you once. That's all that matters."

She smiled sadly at me. "Yeah." She slipped her phone back into her bag. "Do you mind walking me to my car?"

I smirked at her and held out my hand. She took it and I led her outside. The asshole from before that was grabbing on her was down on the lawn, surrounded by his friends, drinking even more heavily. When we passed them on the sidewalk, the dipshit made the mistake of calling her a fucking cunt in my hearing. I went to turn around to pummel the fucker senseless but Bella tightened her grip on my hand and when I looked back, she shook her head once.

"Maybe so, sweetie, but I'm not the one whose nuts are going to be the size of grapefruits in the morning, growing so big it'll pop the small excuse of what you call a dick off. Good luck getting those pants on then. Maybe you can be Betsy Ross instead. God knows you've got bigger size breasts than I do for the role so it should work out real well. Think about it. Goodnight, gentlemen." She started leading me away, my eyes wide as I trailed after her. The guys laughed and said things like, "Burn," among other things. The fucker didn't say a word to Bella again, which might have had something to do with me glaring back at him, giving him one shake of my head in warning. Bella wouldn't be able to stop me this time if he opened his mouth.

When we reached her car, she let my hand go to get her keys out of her bag. She unlocked the car, opened her door and turned back to look at me. "Thanks for inviting me, it was fun. Please tell the guys I said thanks, will you? If they're not too wasted by now?" She smirked at me.

I nodded and moved closer to her. "Thanks for coming to see me," I whispered.

She smiled up at me. "Sure. I'm glad I got to see you, too."

I really wanted to kiss the corner of her mouth, just one smooth peck, to let her know just how much I was missing her, how much I thought about her, how special she was to me...but I didn't want to make another mistake and screw things up. So, I pulled her into a hug and kissed her right temple instead.

"Try not to dazzle the ladies too much," she teased.

I snorted and then smirked. "I'll try but dressed like this, it's kind of hard not to. I'll be fighting them off. Ladies love the uniform, you know."

She laughed and squeezed me. "Very true." She pulled away, kissing my cheek as she went. I wanted nothing more than to pull her back to me but I knew I had to let her go.

"Drive safe, okay? And be careful. If you need anything..."

She smiled. "I'll call you," she said quietly.

I nodded. I sighed and cupped her cheek, stroking her skin with my thumb. "Have a good night, Bells. Be safe," I whispered.

"You, too," she whispered back. She gently covered my hand with hers and turned to kiss my palm before letting it go. While the action was a familar one between us, something about it made me want to grab her, hold her to me and murmur in her ear just how much she meant to me. But, I didn't; one look into her eyes kept me from reaching out and doing what I envisioned. "'Nite, Jake."

I smiled back at her. "'Nite."

I watched as she drove away and I hated the sight. I saw it twice a week when we met for coffee but this time, it just felt worse. It was tinged with even more regret than usual. I should have kissed her.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: ****I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**Thank you so much for all of your incredible feedback. Really. =) And thank you to all of you who are faving and following the story, here and on Tricky Raven. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**BPOV**

Scott was on his dinner break and I had two customers, one in the mystery section and the other one looking through the history books we had to offer. I stayed behind the desk and continued reading a book called _Hush, Hush_. Lindsey had read the series and said I would love it, so I checked it out. I had to admit, it was a pretty good story so far.

The jingles sounded again, making me curse them under my breath for the twenty seventh time that night. I looked up to see a very familiar face heading towards me. My brows furrowed as I closed my book. "Hey. Everything okay?"

"Yeah," he smiled at me.

"We're still meeting at seven thirty, right?"

"Actually, I was thinking maybe we'd do something different tonight."

"Oh. Okay, like what?"

"I was thinking we'd go see a movie."

I bit my lip. "I don't know if I can be gone that long."

I saw his face crumble slightly but he tried to hide it with a small smile. "Oh. Uh, right. Well, I figured I'd give it a shot. I guess I'll see you at seven thirty then." He turned to leave and my heart clenched inside my chest.

"What time would it start playing?"

He stopped and turned back around to me. "Uh, eight twenty five. Why?"

I thought for a minute. "Maybe I can tell Mom I went to the library or something."

He grinned. "If you could, that would be awesome. As long as it doesn't come back on you."

I shrugged. "I'll work something out. Which theater?"

"The one at the mall. You could meet me right outside as soon as you get off work."

I nodded, smiling. "Okay. I'll head over as soon as I get out of here."

"Great." His own smile widened. "I'll see you then."

"Hold your horses, buddy. What movie are we talking about here?"

He smirked at me. "Anna Karenina."

I gasped and he laughed. "I haven't seen it yet."

"I know. I figured you wouldn't go opening weekend. So, I thought, why not tonight?"

I grinned excitedly. "I can't wait!"

He laughed again. "I bet. Alright, so I'll see you outside the theater around seven thirtyish, seven forty?" I nodded enthusiastically. He chuckled and squeezed my hand on the counter. "Okay, I'll see you then." He let me go and I couldn't help but ask.

"You'd really torture yourself for like that for two hours for me?" I smirked at him.

Instead of smirking back at me, he simply smiled. "What wouldn't I do for my girl?"

My heart stopped in my chest when he winked and then left. I could only breathe again when he was gone. How could he still affect me so easily? It wasn't like he'd never said anything sweet like that to me before... This time, though, it almost seemed...different. With as much meaning behind it as always but with another added something as well.

I shook my head to clear it and pasted on a smile as the customer who had found the right mystery book he wanted came forward to pay for it.

...

**JPOV**

I smiled to myself as I got back into my car and drove over to the mall. I was really glad I was getting to take her to see this movie. I knew it would never make up for me canceling on her that one time and not realizing that Chelsea had never bought The Bourne Legacy tickets but I wanted to try. And Bella, bless her, was letting me.

...

**BPOV**

My heart kept pounding every time Jake reached over his hand to take mine. My skin would tingle every time he would rub the top of my hand with his thumb soothingly. I would feel a fluttering in my stomach whenever he would whisper into my ear.

If I didn't know any better (and unfortunately I did) I would almost say this was a date. It felt like one, it looked like one and I found myself hoping it actually was one. There were quite a few times in the last forty minutes that I wished he'd put me out of my misery and finally lean over to kiss me. And I felt guilty after each one when I thought of Andrew.

I finally just sighed quietly and laid my head on Jake's shoulder. He kissed the top of my head and lifted my hand to kiss it. I ignored the pounding pulse in my ears when he did and forced myself to focus on the movie. The stomach-in-my-throat feeling couldn't be helped, though.

...

**JPOV**

This movie was fucking boring as hell but it was making Bella happy and that was all that mattered.

Strangely, though, she hadn't touched the Twizzlers I'd brought for her. That was odd; she loved Twizzlers.

"Hey," I murmured to her hair. "Do you not like Twizzlers anymore?"

"Hmm?" She moved her head on my shoulder to look up at me sleepily. "Oh. Um, yeah, I still do."

"I'm surprised you haven't attacked them yet," I teased her.

She smiled, seeming a bit uneasy. "I'm gonna save them for later."

I chuckled, uncertain. "Okay." She continued to stare up at me and my brows furrowed. "You okay, Bells?"

"Hmm? Oh. Yeah. Sorry." She blushed and turned back to the movie.

I kissed the top of her head gently, wondering what she had been thinking when studying me. What I wouldn't give to be inside her head right now.

...

**BPOV**

"Thank you for the movie." I smiled up at Jake as we walked out to our cars, arm in arm.

"You're welcome," he smiled back. "Just don't be surprised if the next movie we see is an action thriller."

I laughed. "Sounds fair to me. You earned it."

He grinned and kissed the side of my head, taking my hand in his. "So where are you doing Thanksgiving this year?"

"Actually, Dad and Esme are coming up here to have dinner with us. Nick will be there, too. I like that they all get along better now but it's still weird sometimes," I chuckled.

"So that means we only have Thursday and then next Tuesday, right?" I nodded and he sighed.

I squeezed his hand sympathetically. "I'm sorry."

"Nah, honey. Don't be." He lifted our hands and kissed mine. ""It's just...I wish I got to see you more, that's all. But, I'm grateful I can see you at all so I'm not complaining." He gave me a reassuring smile.

I bit my lip and lowered my eyes down to the ground. "What will you do that day?"

He shrugged. "Probably watch the game. Jared and the guys invited us over to their house. Josh is bringing his girlfriend and Zack is bringing some new girl he started seeing. Knowing Jared and John, they'll probably get dates. Adam will just be Adam and Sam probably won't stop by until halftime. Me? I think I'm just gonna stay home this time. I'm just not feeling it this year."

I felt bad; Chelsea had really done a number on him; more than I realized. I kept asking him why he didn't start dating but he would just say he was fine with the way things were and then change the subject. I had to tread lightly. "Is this because you don't have a date?"

"Huh? Nah, nothing like that. I really just want to stay close to home, that's all."

I nodded. "Oh. Well, there's nothing wrong with that. Sometimes it's nice to have some quiet time to yourself, especially on hectic days like that one."

He squeezed my hand and smiled. "Exactly."

...

**JPOV**

I was definitely not looking forward to this. I knew it was ridiculous but I absolutely hated that I wouldn't get to see Bella all weekend. Granted, we'd only meet up twice a week usually anyway but still, I didn't like that she was definitely off limits to me for the next five days. The only consolation I had was that the other day, I had finally shown her where my new apartment was. When she had asked why the change in address, I told her that I simply didn't want to deal with any psychotic ex behavior without getting into it. She had frowned but nodded, not pushing it.

I walked her out to her car after our regular coffee meetup on Tuesday, ignoring the lump forming in my throat. I seriously was a big pussy when it came to her.

She turned, smiling at me. "I'll see you next week." She then smirked. "You'll stay out of trouble until then?"

I smirked in return. "Might be hard to do but I'll do it just for you." I winked at her. "Enjoy Thursday."

"Thanks. You, too. I'll see you next Tuesday."

I smiled at her. "Yeah. I'll see you then."

She hugged me and then kissed my cheek before getting into the car. "Take care of yourself," she called over her shoulder.

"You, too." I shut her door for her and waved, watching her back out of her spot. I fucking hated watching her drive away from me all the time. I wished that just once she could stay and not have to run off.

Well, there was no time like the present to stock up on beer and food before heading home. Tomorrow, the store would be even more of a madhouse. I guess I'd be catching the holiday movie marathons over the weekend.

...

**BPOV**

I had everything set. Dad and Esme would be arriving soon. Andrew would be over a little later so he could have dinner with his family. Nick was already here, helping Mom with last minute touches in decorating. The turkey was in the oven. We were good.

The food I had made yesterday was already in the car as I'd discreetly loaded it while Mom and Nick had been busy. I was already cleaned up and dressed for the day. I was good to go.

"Mom! I'm heading to Jess' for a while!" Thankfully, Jess was willing to cover for me and hadn't asked questions, only told me to enjoy the little holiday nookie I was getting from Andrew. She had been way off but no way would I correct her mistaken assumption. "I'll see you in about an hour or maybe two! Make sure to baste the bird like I taught you!" I called to Mom from the front door.

"Alright, Bella! Your father and Esme will probably be here within the hour! Drive carefully!" She called back from the dining room.

"You got it! See you guys soon!" I headed out the door and prayed I could make this all work.

...

**JPOV**

I sighed as I sat back on my couch, watching the yearly showing of March Of the Wooden Soldiers. I had never seen it until I met Bella and she introduced me to it. We had watched it the two Thanksgivings I'd spent with her, Bella insisting that it was tradition. I smiled at the memories of us laughing at Laurel and Hardy and their craziness. My smile soon dropped, though; thinking about it just made me miss her that much more.

Someone started knocking on my door. I groaned in annoyance but got up. If this was Sam trying to convince me to go to Jared's...

I opened the door to see Bella there, looking absolutely amazing and smirking at me.

"Bells?" I asked in shock.

She came in and closed the door behind her. "You've got five minutes to get dressed so we can go. My car's running."

...

**BPOV**

Jake was still in shock as I drove to Jared's. "Are you sure you're okay with doing this? Isn't your dad expecting to see you today?"

I nodded. "Don't worry. I've got it all figured out. I'm nothing if not efficient." I winked at him and he chuckled, shaking his head.

We parked in front of the house and Jake helped me carry everything inside. Everyone's eyes were wide as I loaded the stuffed turkey into the oven to heat it up. I had made everything yesterday so I could make a real Thanksgiving dinner for them all. I know they didn't celebrate it for obvious reasons but they still loved the food. I took my coat off and got to work.

...

**JPOV**

"I really am sorry that you didn't get to eat this fresh, guys." Bella looked worriedly around the table.

"Bella, you could've given all of this to me ice cold and I would still love you for it," Jared said through a mouthful of food. "I can't tell you how much I appreciate this."

"Me, too," John and Adam added while chowing down. The others all stayed silent but nodded their heads. Amanda smiled at Bella, winking, and the other girls, the dates and Zack's newest flavor of the month, didn't say a word or even acknowledge her.

I grabbed Bella's hand in mine and squeezed. "It really is great. Thank you."

She smiled at me. "You're welcome."

"You know, you could have just stopped at the regular mashed potatoes."

She shrugged and sipped her water. "Yeah, but you prefer sweet potato."

I smiled affectionately at her and kissed her temple. "You're amazing, you know that?" I whispered to her.

"And you're just figuring this out now?" She smirked at me, making me laugh.

"I'm catching on." I winked at her, making her blush and smile while squeezing my hand back.

...

**BPOV**

I groaned into the phone. "Mom, the turkey shouldn't be as dry as you're describing."

"I know it shouldn't and I did what you said but Nick tried a piece and said it was dry as a bone."

I sighed angrily. "Okay. Do me a favor. Ask Esme to help you until I get there. I should be leaving in about fifteen minutes and then I'll be home. Okay?"

"Alright. Be careful, Bella. There's a lot of drunk drivers on the road today."

I smiled. She had definitely come a long way in the last five months. "I will, Mom. I promise. I'll see you in a bit."

"Okay. See you then." I snapped my phone shut, shaking my head and groaning again.

I continued to wash dishes and barely heard when Jake came in. "Whoa. Why are you cleaning?"

I shrugged. "It's fine. The guys did offer but I told them not to worry about it. Besides, I'm only throwing them into the dishwasher."

He sighed angrily himself. "Yeah, the pots and pans aren't going in there. I swear, Bella, you're too easy on them. Here. Leave them for me. I'll take care of it."

I glared in his direction. "Nope. If you want to help, you get to dry."

He glared back but then relented. "Fine." He dried everything I handed him.

"So, I left a plate in the oven for Sam when he gets here. Please make sure to turn it off when he takes it out. The pies and whipped cream are in the fridge. So is the eggnog that's left over. The turkey and everything else is already wrapped up and in the fridge, too."

He laughed. "You are efficient."

I smiled. "You got that right."

"You know, Bells. This was really great. You didn't have to do this but it was nice that you did."

I shrugged and smiled over at him. "It was nothing. I'm glad you guys were able to eat some real food instead of pizza and beer. Had that happened I seriously doubt Jared and John would've had a prayer of getting lucky tonight," I teased.

He snorted. "They still don't have a prayer. They might actually be lucky if they don't, though. Those girls...yikes."

I chuckled. "Not exactly the warmest people you've ever met, huh?"

"Not warm whatsoever," he scoffed. "They are perfect examples of a frigid bitch."

I shook my head, chuckling again. "Maybe they're just nervous and uncomfortable. A holiday isn't exactly first date territory. I know I'd be nervous."

"Yeah, but had you been in their place, you would still be polite, smile and answer when spoken to, no matter how shy you might be. Not them. They're not making one bit of effort to be sociable and it's a freaking holiday."

I shrugged again. "Well, then that's on them. They're missing out on some great guys if they don't want to put more effort into it. Some people just don't realize how good they have it."

"Yeah," he muttered. "Some people definitely don't."

I glanced over and saw him staring at the serving dish in his hand that he was drying mindlessly. I finished up the last pot and stuck it in the drying rack. Jake looked at me confused when I grabbed the hand towel, dried my hands, tossed it in the rack and hugged him. "This year is almost over. A new one's right around the corner. As cliche as it is, a new year _is_ a chance to start fresh. You need to leave what happened in the past. Just keep moving forward...okay?"

He nodded against me and hugged me tighter. I sighed contentedly and melted into him.

"Oh...a private moment. Sorry. Guess I'll head back out."

I rolled my eyes and pulled away to look back over my shoulder. "Jared, shut up and get in here."

Jared stopped and turned around. "Huh?"

I bit my lip, grinning. I turned to face him and held out my arms. "You know you want a hug."

His eyes widened. "Nuh uh. You leave all that lovey dovey shit to Jake and leave me out of it. Back away, woman." I stalked over and hugged him tightly, hearing Jake laugh behind me. I then kissed his cheek and I was satisfied when I saw his face darken a few shades. "Man. Can't you save that shit for when my lady's in the room or something? This way she can get all jealous and like, I don't know, tell you to back off and then start sexing me up right there in front of you?"

I scoffed in disgust and smacked him in the back of the head. I then rolled my eyes and went back to the sink. "Way to ruin the moment, jerk."

"Hey, it worked, didn't it? Got you right off me."

I rolled my eyes again. "That's okay. Just like in everything else, Jake beats you in hugs, too, Jared. They last longer, they're bigger and are _way_ more satisfying," I said in a teasing yet husky tone.

Jake cracked up and Jared glared at me. I blew him a kiss and smirked in response.

...

**JPOV**

I walked Bella to her car and smiled at her. "Seriously, thanks again. That was really great of you."

She smiled. "You're welcome. I'm glad I could do it." She then bit her lip. "Are you sure Sam will be able to give you a ride home later?"

I gave a dismissive shrug. "Yeah. It won't be a problem."

"Okay. I'll see you Tuesday then?"

I nodded, smiling. "Yeah."

"Okay. See you then." She got into her car and before I shut the door, I bit my lip, debating something. I hoped I wasn't going to screw things up by doing this. "Hey, Bells."

"Yeah?"

"What you said before, about starting fresh in the new year...was there anything...specific you meant?"

She licked her lips and then got out of the car, shutting the door. She sighed and leaned back against her car with her arms crossed. Uh oh, not a good sign. "Honestly? I think Chelsea did a number on you and it's taken a toll on you more than you realize. I hate to think that even though she's not physically present, she's still getting to you and wearing you down."

My eyes widened; okay, not what I was expecting. "What?"

She started stammering nervously. "I'm not trying to say anything bad, Jake. I just mean, well, you aren't dating, every time a woman flirts with you or you're around them for more than a minute, you automatically think they're bad news. And I guess I just don't want you to close yourself off. Like...what if the perfect woman comes along and you don't give her a shot because this...thing is still hanging over you and you're afraid to let her get close?" I saw her swallow and I wondered if I had really made her that nervous, thinking I'd be angry.

My eyes narrowed as I studied her intently. Was she worried I'd still have Chelsea on my mind? Or that I wasn't over her? Far from it. Or was she just genuinely concerned for me as her friend? I couldn't read her. I decided to play it safe. "She won't."

"How do you know? She could come along tomorrow for all you know or over the weekend if you go to the supermarket and she's ahead of you in line? You don't know."

"Yeah, I do."

"No, you don't. How can you know something like that?"

"Because the perfect girl already did come along." So much for playing it safe.

I saw her pale visibly in shock. Shit. "Oh..."

I shouldn't have said that. She knew now and she'll tell me she doesn't want that. Fuck.

She bit her lip. "Well, there you go," she said, chuckling uneasily. "Now you just need to be more open."

I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. "I'm trying. It's not easy, though." I dropped my hand and stared into her eyes. "I can never really tell what the right thing to do is." Shit, what am I doing? I need to backtrack. Fast. "And I'm afraid of doing the wrong thing." Please, Bella. Give me something.

She smiled warmly at me. "You shouldn't worry so much. If it's meant to be, it'll work out."

What the hell did that mean? Was she telling me not to think in the direction I was thinking? Was she telling me that I should say something? What the hell was she trying to tell me? Bella, you've got to give me more than that. "We'll see." That sounded nice and neutral, right? No expectations and no pushing. No one way or the other. Just middle ground. Yeah, middle ground.

She leaned forward and kissed my cheek. "You'll be fine. I don't mean to be rude but I really have to go. I'll see you Tuesday, okay?" She got into her car, smiling up at me. I shut her door gently and waved as she drove off.

Crap. I really, really hoped she'd give me more of a direction to go in the next time I saw her. I didn't want to make the wrong move and lose her again. Sure, I loved her and I wanted nothing more than to have her with me, but having her in my life even if only as the same Bells that had been my friend these past few years if that was what she wanted, was way better than not having her at all. I sighed and headed back into the house to finish watching the game. Someone needs to make an instruction manual for this shit.

...

**BPOV**

I drove until my eyes got too blurry and I had to pull over. I hated that I was crying but I couldn't help it. So, he had met someone already. I felt like the world's biggest idiot. I should have known that not only was I still in love with him but that he would meet someone new eventually. And apparently, she was the perfect woman for him. I had set myself up for more pain, but this time knowingly, even though I had tried convincing myself that I was no longer in love with him. How wrong I'd been.

I was too busy crying into my hands to know that someone had pulled up behind me. I shrieked when a knock came at my window, making me jump. I was relieved to see it was Sam and I opened my window. "Geez, Sam. You scared me," I sniffled, wiping under my eyes.

"Sorry," he said, frowning. "I saw you pulled over and wanted to make sure you were okay. Not having car trouble or something. Everything alright?"

I nodded, forcing a smile. "Yeah. I'm fine. The car's fine. Sorry."

"Then what has you so upset?" His frown intensified but he gave me a knowing look. Crap, I didn't want him going back to Jake and giving him a hard time, blaming him, for why I had been crying.

"Um, nothing. Nothing. I was just heading home. Mom's about to destroy my turkey," I joked weakly but he didn't laugh; he didn't even crack a smile.

"Are you sure?"

I sniffled, nodding again. "Yeah. I promise, Sam, I'm fine. I always get stressed out like this at the holidays. Trust me," I chuckled uneasily. "This is the tip of the iceberg. Wait until Christmas comes."

He thought it over for a minute and then nodded, still slightly studying me. "Alright. Well, enjoy dinner with your family and I'll see you soon."

I smiled. "Thanks. Enjoy the game. I'll stop by the shop next week to come say hi."

He nodded again. "Okay. See you then." He walked away back to his car and I put my window up. I sniffled, glanced around and then pulled back out onto the road. Sam beeped as he did a U-turn and I beeped him back.

I forced myself to take a deep breath and focus on what I had to do the rest of the day. I wouldn't allow myself to get upset. Jake was almost twenty eight years old and it only made sense that as he got closer to thirty, he'd be dating more and looking to settle down eventually. When I had talked to him about being more open, I had meant more that I felt he was bitter and closing himself off, even from the guys. If I hadn't forced him out of his apartment earlier, he would've spent today alone. But then again, his _perfect girl_ might've showed up later to visit. I mentally berated myself for that jealous thought.

Jake was my best friend and if anyone deserved to be happy, it was him. And if this girl made him happy, then I'd have to deal. After all, I was in a relationship myself. I immediately felt guilty for crying over one guy while I was dating another. Andrew loved me and had been there when Jake hadn't. He deserved so much better but he wanted me. I would have to be better for him and finally let the idea of Jake being the perfect guy for me go.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: ****I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**Thank you so much for all of your incredible feedback. Really. =) And thank you to all of you who are faving and following the story, here and on Tricky Raven. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**JPOV**

All of us looked up when Sam entered. We all greeted him and he was introduced to the girls. He gave them polite nods and said hello.

"Hey. Bella left you a plate in the oven. You wanna grab it first and bring it in here?"

He glared at me. "Yeah, actually. I'd like to talk to you for a second so why don't you come in the kitchen while I do that?"

My brows furrowed. He seemed pissed at me. Okay... "Sure." I got up and followed him.

He grabbed his plate and made sure to turn the oven off. I set an open beer bottle in front of him. "What's up?"

"You tell me. Why did I find Bella crying on the side of the road?"

My jaw dropped. "What?" She had been crying?

"Yep. Saw her car pulled over. I pulled over myself to see what was going on and caught her crying. She tried to play it off as holiday stress but something tells me it's more than that." He gave me a sharp look.

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "I should've known."

"Known what?"

"I...I kind of made a mistake."

He glared at me again. "I figured that. What'd you do this time?"

I sighed again and sat down across from him at the kitchen table as he ate. "We were out by the car, talking. She had said something before...I wanted to know what she meant."

"What'd she say?"

"She told me that the new year is a fresh start and it was right around the corner. That I should leave the past in the past, like what happened with...Chelsea. That I should just keep moving forward."

He nodded in approval. "Good advice. So, you asked her what she meant by that? Isn't it all laid out right there for you?"

"Well...I wanted to know if...I wanted to know if she also meant that she and I could have a fresh start as well."

He nodded again. "Okay."

"So, I asked her what she meant and she started to tell me how I'm closed off and have been since the whole thing with Chels. That I'm not dating and I'm bitter towards other women. That I should be more open..."

"Huh. She's right."

I rolled my eyes. "Gee, thanks."

He shrugged. "It's the truth, Jake. You're depressed. Granted, less since you started talking to Bella again but you still are. I didn't expect to see you here today until she called me yesterday telling me what she planned."

My brows arched in surprise. "She called _you_?"

He sipped his beer and nodded. "She said she didn't want you sitting home alone. That even though we don't celebrate the holiday that she didn't want you eating pizza."

I chuckled. "Man. She is devious, that one. She really shocked me when she showed up. She gave me literally five minutes to get ready and then she was pushing me out the door. I still can't believe she made a whole Thanksgiving dinner for us."

"I can. She cares about you, Jake. She's worried about you. You know she only started bringing food around the shop after she saw you and how much weight you'd lost? She knows you're not sleeping as much as you should be. She also knows that you basically come to work, go home and do it all over again the next day. You've completely shut down." He thought for a minute before going back to his food. "Except when it comes to her."

"She's important to me, Sam. You know that."

"That's all fine and good but she's not your whole life, either. Look at what happened the last time you made a woman your whole life."

I scoffed and got up to get another beer. "I don't need to hear this shit. I'm well aware of how much I fucked up, Sam, without you sitting here telling me. Thanks."

"Relax. I'm not trying to crucify you for it. I'm just saying you can't do that again. Even when you were all about your girlfriend, you still lived your life. You still went out with us guys, you still went out and did things. You didn't sit at home and stay glued to the damn tube all the time."

"Look," I turned to glare at Sam as I opened my bottle. "The month and a half I didn't see Bella or talk to her kicked my ass. And not just because I couldn't be up her ass like you seem to think I want to be, but because I had a fucking psycho for a girlfriend who pretty much ruined my life in a matter of three fucking months. Not to mention the psycho shit she pulled after I dumped her ass which continued until I had to move to a new place. I'm tired. I want some peace for a while. I just got Bella back and that's all I want to focus on for right now. I don't see what's so fucking wrong with that."

Sam sighed. "I get that, I do. After Emily...all I wanted was to focus on work and other things for a while. I still do, to some extent. But, right now, I'm a fucking social butterfly compared to you. I didn't shut down completely, not the way you've been since Bella's birthday. I don't really date and there's not really anyone I'm interested in, but I'm not closed off to all women, either. Not the way you've been since your ex."

"Yeah, well, I've got my reasons."

Sam shook his head slightly, deciding to let it go. "Yeah, sure. Anyway, so what did you do to make Bella cry?"

I glared at him again but continued. "I think I might have said the wrong thing."

"Which was?"

I sat back down, sighing. "She told me, 'you never know, the perfect girl might come along.' And I told her that I knew the perfect girl wouldn't because she already had."

Sam chewed thoughtfully for a minute. "Yep. That'll do it."

I dropped my head into my hands. "Shit. I didn't mean to overstep things. I know we're just kind of finding our way back to normal right now and I didn't mean to push her and make her upset."

"Push her?"

I sighed again and dropped my hand. "Nothing, just...ah, forget it. So, she's upset. Great. I wish she'd give me her fucking number already so I could call her."

Sam snorted. "She won't ever give that to you."

I glared at him. "Why not?"

He glared back at me, impatient with my being slow apparently. "Because she knows that dad of hers is combing her phone bills, that's why." I looked up in shock. "What? She didn't tell you?" I shook my head again. I knew she had to keep it quiet that she was spending time with me again, but I never knew they were putting her on complete lockdown. Looking through her phone records to see if she had talked to me? Damn. I knew Masen was fucking nuts, but holy shit. "Yep. They're keeping tight tabs on her. Which, honestly, is why I'm surprised she gets away with seeing you at all but I'm thinking she covers her tracks really well so she doesn't tip them off. Me and the guys-we're the only ones who know she's been talking to you and seeing you again. She hasn't told anyone else, even that stepmother of hers she's so fond of. What you told me about what she said about having an airtight schedule and why sometimes she's not sure if she can stay longer or see you certain days, that's what she's talking about. You know that."

"Yeah, but...I didn't think it was that bad. I figured maybe she was...protecting herself, you know, to keep me from...hurting her again. And that's why she changed her number and email and all that. Kicked me off of Facebook."

Sam snorted. "Nope. She did all that to show them she was trying to keep you out so she could keep you free and clear of a restraining order. Which is why we all got the phone calls from Masen and not anything more official."

I shook my head and placed my head in my hand. "Holy fuck."

"Yep." He went back to eating and I sat there, thinking over everything I had just learned.

"Sam, give me her number."

He shook his head, frowning up at me. "Nope."

"Come on, man. You know I'm not a threat to her."

"It's not about that. It's about what would happen if Masen found out I gave you her new number."

I rolled my eyes. "He's not gonna find out. Come on."

He sighed, watching me for a minute. "You're gonna have to change your number first."

I groaned. "Or you could just let me use your phone and stop busting my balls. You're allowed to call her, right? That's why you have her number."

"Yeah," he said uncertainly. "Why? What can't wait until you see her next week?"

My eyes widened in disbelief. "You just told me she was on the side of the road crying over something I said. I'd like to clear it up and make sure she's okay." He still seemed unsure. I sighed. "Sam, please. You know how miserable I've been without her. What if she decides by next week that she doesn't want to see me anymore?"

"Then I'd say that's up to her and that's on you."

"Sam," I growled. "Come on. I'm asking you as a good buddy of mine. Let me call her."

He glared at me, then took his phone out of his pocket and tossed it towards me. "Fine. But keep it short. And you better make fucking sure that Masen doesn't know it's you."

I nodded, getting out of my chair. "I will. I promise." I then walked outside quickly to make the call.

...

**BPOV**

"This is really great, love." Dad smiled at me.

"You're an excellent liar, Dad." I smiled back at him.

He and everyone else chuckled. "No. I mean it. The turkey is not that dry."

I sighed sadly. "Yeah, it is but that's my fault. I should have been back here sooner. I'm sorry, everyone."

"Bella, it's perfectly fine." Esme reached over and squeezed my hand, smiling reassuringly.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I tried my best," Mom mumbled regretfully.

"Mom, it's fine. I know you did. I should have been here, that was my fault." I smiled over at her. "You did a great job. You made the biscuits all by yourself as well as the mashed potatoes. They're very good."

Mom smiled shyly and looked back down at her plate, scooping up some of the latter with her fork. "Nick helped."

Nick chuckled. "I just peeled the potatoes. You're too modest, babe." He leaned over and kissed her cheek, making her blush. I smiled warmly watching them. Nick may be over ten years younger than her but he really was good for her.

"You both did a great job," Lindz offered. She had decided to eat with us this year. I smiled at her.

I heard my phone ringing in the kitchen. "Whoops. Excuse me. That's probably Andrew." I tossed my napkin on the table and hurried out of the room. I glanced at the screen, my brows furrowing, and picked up the call. "Sam? What's wrong? Is everything okay?" I asked quietly, praying this had nothing to do with the talk Jake and I had earlier.

"Hey, it's me."

My eyes widened and I hurriedly made my way into the laundry room, shutting the door behind me silently. "Hey. Are you okay? Why are you calling me from Sam's phone? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just...wanted to talk to you for a minute. Can you talk?"

I walked to the window. "Just for a minute. Everyone's finishing up dinner right now."

"Okay. I'll make it quick then." I heard him take a deep breath. "How are you?"

I slapped my hand to my forehead. "How am I? Jacob, I-"

"No, no, no. I'm...okay, I'm just gonna get right to it. Sam said he ran into you on his way here."

I shut my eyes briefly, inwardly cursing Sam. "Okay." I didn't want to give anything away if Sam hadn't told him I'd been crying. Though, I knew that if he mentioned seeing me to Jake, he most likely would have mentioned my freak out. Why else would Jake be calling me on Sam's phone? "Yeah, he did. So?"

"Well, he said that you were...upset."

Dammit, Sam! I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. "I'll tell you the same thing I told him. I'm stressed to the max right now, with the holidays and everything. That's all."

"Uh huh." Jake sounded like he didn't buy it for a second.

"That's all it was. It's nothing to worry about. I'm a girl, I cry," I chuckled uneasily. "It's a great stress reliever sometimes."

A minute of silence passed between us.

"Are you sure that's the only reason you were upset? That it wasn't because of what we were talking about right before you left?"

I ran a hand into my hair and left it there, gripping tightly in my frustration. I silently cursed myself for being so stupid and so transparent. "Why would I be upset? You asked me what I meant and I told you. That was it."

"So...it has nothing to do with me saying I'd already met the perfect woman then?"

Dammit, Jake. Stop knowing me so well! "Not at all." I forced myself to sound as genuine and nonplussed as possible. "I think if you've met her then that's great. I think by now you know exactly what you're looking for and if you've found it, then I'm really happy for you."

"Are you?"

"Yes, I am. Why wouldn't I be?" I snapped.

He sighed on the other end. "No reason. Look, I'm not...seeing anyone or even planning to start seeing anyone so..."

Okay, I'd had enough. "That's completely up to you. As happy as I am for you, Jake, and I'm here to talk anytime you want to, I gotta admit, I'm wondering why you're even telling me this right now."

"Well, I don't want you to think that I...that I'm looking to jump into another relationship. I, uh...I think you were right when you said before that I'm still too raw from the Chelsea thing. So, I just don't want you to...you know, be upset."

I sighed. "Jake, I just told you. I wasn't upset because of that." God, I was such a liar. "So, stop worrying. I'm fine. And even if you did decide to jump into another relationship, that's up to you, not me. It's not my business." I knew I was being slightly mean but I didn't want to discuss this anymore...ever.

"Yeah, it is your business," he snapped.

"How so?"

"Because...you know, you're...you're my best friend and I...I don't want you to worry, that's all."

I took another deep breath and licked my lips. "I'm not worried," I said much nicer than I'd been the last couple of minutes. "I appreciate the thought, I do, but...I'm not worried. I know you won't make the same mistake twice." Then I realized how that sounded, almost like a threat. "I mean, not dating another Chelsea. That's the mistake I was talking about. Not...anything else."

"Right." He still sounded like he didn't believe me but instead, he sighed one more time. "So...you're okay then? You're not...you know, still upset?"

"Nope. I'm fine. I appreciate you checking on me but I'm perfectly fine. I promise."

"Okay then." I heard him let out a nervous breath. "Look, I know you've gotta go but I was wondering...would it be okay if I called you later tonight?"

I bit my lip. "Jake...I don't think you should. I mean, I'm not even supposed to be talking to you..." I glanced back over my shoulder, feeling as if someone was about to burst into the door any minute and find me.

"Well, can I call you tomorrow then?" He sounded so hopeful yet hurt that I hated to refuse him.

"Jake..."

"Bells...I don't like not being able to call you if I need to. Plus, we used to talk all the time. Remember?"

I walked back near the door, buying time to think of how to answer. "I remember."

"So then, let me call you. I won't interrupt your time with your family. I'll call you before you fall asleep." I bit my lip again, contemplating. "Come on, Bells. Please?" He begged.

I sighed quietly. "You...you're gonna have to change your number. If you're really serious. You can't call me from your old one. I don't...have my own plan yet," I finished in a whisper.

"Say no more. I'll call them as soon as I hang up with you and have the number changed. I promise."

"Okay," I whispered. "Just...text me when you get it and let me know it's you without saying who you are." I sighed one more time, hating that I had to have us take such measures just to be able to talk to one another. "Okay?"

"I will. And, Bells...thanks."

"Sure, sure."

He chuckled on the other end and I realized what I'd said. Crap. "I'll call you tonight, honey. Enjoy the rest of the day with your folks."

"Thank you." I smiled. "I'll talk to you tonight."

"Talk to you then. Later, honey."

"Bye."

I hung up the phone and tried to stop smiling like an idiot. He had called to make sure I was okay, to assure me he wouldn't make the same mistake as last time. I sighed happily, trying not to berate myself for being such a fool, and went back to my family and dry turkey.

...

**JPOV**

I stared at the phone, grinning like an idiot. It was amazing what the sound of that girl's voice could do to me.

I put her new number into my phone and then pressed a key to connect me to customer service. If Bells wanted me to change my number then that was what I would do.

I'd do anything to make sure I could keep getting back to normal with her while also making her feel more secure. I'd do anything for her, period.

...

**BPOV**

Everyone was sitting around the table, talking as they sipped coffee and ate pieces of pie. Nick was talking to Dad while Esme and Mom chatted over business ventures for each of their fields. Lindsey talked to me and Andrew about college applications and where she'd like to go and why. I felt a vibration in my lap and I glanced down to see I had a new text message. I checked my phone discreetly and saw an unrecognizable number with a cryptic message: _**Sweet like honey, fierce like a tiger.**_ Muhammad Ali would not be impressed with the creative license Jake had taken with one of his signature phrases. I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing out loud. I quickly replied to him with: _**Dork.**_ A few seconds later, he responded right back. _**Yeah, but your dork. ;)**_ I shook my head.

"Bella."

I snapped back to the conversation at present. "Yeah?"

"What colleges have you already applied to?" Lindsey asked me again.

"Oh, um, NYU, Columbia, Vassar, Yale, Boston U, Harvard, Georgetown, UW, Cambridge, Oxford, UCL, King's College of London, the American University of Paris and Paris Sorbonne University." Nick and Lindsey stared at me in shock. Everyone else had already known what applications I had sent out. Lindsey had an idea but I had never discussed it at length with her, until now.

"You applied to all of those already?" Lindsey nearly squeaked out.

"Well, most I applied for early decision so I should be hearing back from them soon. I don't really expect to get in most of them. I know they're all pretty much dream schools. NYU was always my dream since I was a kid but...I don't know, we'll see. If I could get to go to London or Paris for school, that would be amazing."

"You'll get them, love." I glanced up at Dad who was smiling reassuringly at me as was Mom and Esme. "You're extremely intelligent and they would be lucky to have you attending any of their campuses."

I blushed, smiling but embarrassed as I looked back down at my plate. "Dad."

They all chuckled. Andrew squeezed my hand, smiling and winking at me. I smiled back at him gratefully.

"That's...quite an impressive list. But, I do have one question. Where does UW come in?" Lindsey asked, prompting everyone to suddenly look my way, also curious.

I bit my lip to keep from blushing and giving myself away. "Well, I've heard nothing but good things about Seattle and how for business and other ventures, top cities like that are important. Those are the only three cities I'd ever consider: New York, Boston or Seattle. I refuse to think about L.A. and I'd rather avoid Chicago if possible. Washington D.C. is the only other place I'd be willing to relocate to. Other than those areas, the only other alternative for me is Europe." I hoped that would be the end of that.

"Yeah, but Seattle? When you could go to some nicer part of California if you didn't want to go to L.A.? It rains most of the year in Seattle. Did you know that?"

I shrugged. "That doesn't concern me. I only care about the programs available for me to study." And the fact that it's in Jake's home state and three and a half hours away from the reservation he grew up on where his family now lives and where he might move back to in the future has nothing to do with my decision. Nothing whatsoever. At all.

"But why not try for Stanford if you're thinking about the West Coast? That's not in L.A."

"Actually, love," Dad interjected. "That might be a good idea. It wouldn't hurt to see when their deadline is for admission."

"But, Dad, I've already applied to the other Ivy schools you wanted me to and I doubt I'll get into any of them never mind Stanford."

He smirked at me. "Yes, you will. You sell yourself short, Bella. You're a very smart girl. I don't understand why you don't see that in yourself."

"He's right, sweetie. You should give it a try." Mom smiled at me.

Everyone was nodding and urging me to apply. I finally relented so they'd ease up. "Okay, I'll go online later and check it out, see if I can still make it in on time." They all encouraged me and were happy to hear it.

"What about you, Andrew?" Mom asked. "Where are you planning to apply to?"

"Well, I did the same as Bella and tried to apply for early decision wherever I could. So far, I've applied to NYU, Boston U and UW. My grades aren't as good as Bella's."

I frowned and squeezed his hand. "Yes, they are. If I can get into any of those places, so can you." He smiled warmly at me and squeezed my hand back.

"How about you, Lindsey?" Mom asked politely.

Lindsey turned red and looked down at her plate. "I haven't applied anywhere yet but I was thinking of Vassar, too. I also might try SUNY and a few other colleges as well as Hunter in the city."

I smiled over at her. "That's great, Lindz. You should try for some of the same places we've applied to. I guarantee you'll get into quite a few of them."

She smiled shyly and shrugged. "Maybe. We'll see. We should go over it later and I'll look them up while you look up Stanford."

Crap. I forgot Lindsey was staying over tonight. Double crap. "Sounds like a plan." I would have to think of an excuse to give to Lindsey later so I could step outside for five minutes when Jake called me.

Everyone went back to talking at once while Andrew kissed the top of my head and rubbed my shoulder. I lifted my head up and kissed him. I did love him, I really did but Jake would always be first in my heart. Andrew knew that but still, he wanted to be with me. I didn't understand that but if I could make him happy before we went away to school, then I would do that. Though, I wasn't sure I could do the sex thing. Sure, we had fooled around a little but I never let it get too far and Andrew knowing my hesitance, never let it get too far, either. He wanted me to be ready and didn't pressure me about it, he never did; he had always been super patient and understanding, telling me that he respected that about me. Andrew wasn't a virgin but I still was and I had some grand delusion since I turned sixteen that I would one day give that to the man I loved. But, that seemed more and more highly improbable as time passed. The night I saw Chelsea with Jake had pretty much killed that idea and whatever little bit was left, what Jake had said to me when he lost his temper on my birthday had been destroyed completely. So, I wasn't under any wrongful assumptions that it would ever happen between Jake and I. But, that didn't mean I still didn't love him and it didn't mean I was ready to give Andrew what I had once wanted to give to Jake.

Almost as if knowing the direction my thoughts were going in, Andrew squeezed my shoulder and whispered to me, "I'm gonna get going. Do you mind walking me to the door?"

I nodded and when we got up to leave with everyone watching us, I simply smiled and said I'd be right back, that I was going to escort Andrew out. Everyone said goodbye to him and then we walked hand in hand to the front door. We stepped out onto the front stoop and there he wrapped his arms aorund me and kissed me deeply. "I was thinking," he murmured to my lips. "Maybe...if you feel up to it, if you...feel ready, maybe we could...try again to, you know...be together."

I bit my lip as I looked up at him, worriedly wondering what the right thing to do here was.

"I mean, we don't have to. I'm not trying to push you. I'll wait as long as you want me to but I guess I just want you to know that I'm ready for that next step anytime you are."

I nodded. "I know," I assured him quietly.

"So, feel free to say no here, but I was thinking, since my parents are leaving tomorrow, taking Danny with them, maybe you and I could go out Saturday and then...I don't know...head back to my house and...maybe spend the night together."

I saw him looking at me hopefully and I felt bad. He had been with me through the most horrible times of this past year. He had stood by me and never asked for anything in return. Even when he knew I was in love with someone else, someone who would never love me in return. Just like Andrew loved me.

Knowing how he felt, I narrowed my eyes at him, studying him for a minute.

"We don't have to...or if you want some time to think about it maybe," Andrew swallowed nervously. "That's fine but don't worry about saying no if it's not what you want."

I shook my head and I saw his face fall slightly before he gave me an understanding smile.

"That's okay. We can still go out Saturday, though, right?" I nodded. "Okay. I'll call you tomorrow, babe. Love you." He kissed me and started walking away.

"Andrew."

He turned around, smiling. "Yeah?"

I moved over to him. "If you think we're ready to take that next step then...we should."

His eyes widened. "Are you sure?" I nodded again. He cupped my chin. "Are you sure you won't regret it? You know, me being the one and not _him_?"

I internally winced but purposely kept my expression smooth. "You're my best friend, Andrew, and I love you, maybe not completely in the same way you love me but I do, and I trust you. How could I regret that?"

His eyes lit up and he kissed me softly before laying his forehead against mine. "Only if you're sure."

I nodded. "I am."

He smiled, kissed me one more time, and then kissed my nose. "How about we see how we feel Saturday and if we both want to...we'll go from there."

I nodded again. "That works for me."

He smiled once more and kissed my forehead. "I'll call you later. I love you. Goodnight, baby."

I smiled at him as he left. "I love you, too. Goodnight."

I watched as he got into his car and drove away, beeping as he left, prompting me to wave.

I bit my lip, thinking. As much as I wished Jake had been the one, I couldn't deny that this was right to do for Andrew. He loved me as much as I loved Jake and I owed it to him to give him my all and try to make him happy. I sighed sadly and walked back into the house. Now, I just had to make sure I didn't allow my talk with Jake later tonight to get to me and force me to back out of my plans.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: ****I know most of what happens in this story (or at least the way it happens in _this_ story) is not realistic, but hey, it's fiction. The time frames for some things mentioned in this portion are also unrealistic, I'm well aware of that, but again, fiction. It's merely exercising the mind and making up stuff. ********None of this has been beta'd so I apologize for that. I didn't have time to go through and re-edit so I'm sure most of it is cringe-worthy.**

**Thank you so much for all of your incredible feedback. Really. =) And thank you to all of you who are faving and following the story, here and on Tricky Raven. =) x3**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related including characters and locales all belong to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight. The only thing that is mine is the story idea. Everything else belongs to her.**

* * *

**JPOV**

I felt like I was on cloud fucking nine at the moment, like everything was getting back to normal where Bella was concerned. She and I had talked the last two nights and it had been so good to hear her voice. And her laugh. I was convinced there was no better sound on the planet than her laugh. And now, here I was throwing the ball around with a couple of the guys, waiting for her to show up as well as Sam and Josh.

The guys decided to have a football game today at the park, just messing around and having some fun. I hoped Bella would play with us and that she was on the opposite team. I'd love to be the one tackling her every play, not just to take her down but also to get my arms around her as much as possible without her becoming uncomfortable like she would if I hugged her for more than fifteen seconds.

Sure enough, ten minutes later, after Sam and Josh had arrived in their own cars, Bella's pulled into the parking lot. I was shocked to see a few girls jump out beside her. From this distance, I couldn't see Jess or Lindsey anywhere but I hoped Bella hadn't brought them. Jess was alright these days I guess though she had always been way too shallow for my tastes to even talk to. Lindsey...ever since Bella's birthday, Lindsey was a pain in the ass in my book and obviously, not one of my biggest fans. If Bella had brought either one of them, what was I supposed to do? Ignore her? No way could I do that, not when I fought so hard to get her and I to the point we were at.

The girls giggled when Jared called out a "Hey, ladies," to them, giving them a flirtatious smile. Typical. My eyes weren't on any of them, though. No, my eyes were for one girl and one girl only. And that girl had a pair of black sweats on her that fit her just right, along with a hoodie and t-shirt underneath. Her hair was up in a ponytail and when she saw me, she smiled. I grinned back at her and had to keep myself from running over to her. Man, I was a sucker for that smile.

Bella led the girls towards us and when she got closer, I approached her, smirking. "You're late, Cullen. We were just about to start without you."

She snorted, smirking right back at me. "Sounds more like you're scared to let me play, Black. Any particular reason?"

I snorted myself and kept tossing the ball in between my hands. "Only that I wouldn't want to mess up those pretty clothes of yours."

She rolled her eyes and chuckled. "Lame, but good try. 'A' for effort."

I shrugged. "I tried."

She laughed and Jared popped up next to me, glaring in my direction and clearing his throat loudly. "Bella, please introduce us to these fine ladies you've brought with you." The girls giggled and I rolled my eyes. Apparently, the word 'jailbait' wasn't in Jared's dictionary. "Are they your cheerleading squad or something?"

Bella rolled her own eyes again. "Yeah. Something like that." She started gesturing towards us, glancing at the girls. "Guys, this is Jake, Jared," She then stage whispered, "The one I warned you about." The girls giggled yet again and Jared glared at Bella while us guys laughed. Bella smirked and continued on. "That's John, Adam, Zack, Sam and Josh." We all said a quick hello. She then turned to us. "And guys this is Kelly, Jenna, Skylar and Katelyn." They all said their hellos as well. Bella rubbed her hands together. "Alright, so are we ready?"

The guys all nodded and started coming up with the two teams, four on four. They asked the girls if they were going to play but they just giggled and shook their heads. Only Kelly said she would. John started to say that made us uneven but Jared shut him up. "Please. We can handle one little girl. Besides, Bella's no threat."

I expected Bella to have a comeback, but instead she just shrugged. "Your funeral." The guys laughed and Jared shook his head. Bella smirked knowingly at Kelly who smirked back at her.

As I'd hoped, Bella was on the opposite team and I was definitely gunning for her. She knew it, too, as she smirked challengingly over the line at me from her position. Sam was the quarterback, of course, and Adam was hiking the ball to him. Jared, John, Josh and I got ready.

"Hike!"

Adam passed Sam the ball and Bella and the rest of her team started running. I charged for her but she saw me coming and somehow dodged me. Sam sailed the ball towards her and she actually caught it and started running. She steered clear of Jared, John and Josh. I sped up and was right on her when she called Kelly's name and passed her the ball. As the ball left her hands, I took her down.

She landed with an 'oof' and we rolled until I lifted myself off of her and laughed, grinning down at her. She groaned angrily and slapped at my shoulder. "Really?"

I nodded. "That's what you get for trying to score a touchdown on me."

She rolled her eyes. "Kelly was the one who scored, not me."

My eyes widened and I looked up. Sure enough, Kelly was doing her own little victory dance as the guys watched. John shoved Jared, irritated. "'She's no threat and neither is Bella.' Yeah, right."

Bella laughed and I turned to look back down at her, narrowing my eyes in suspicion. "Have you been playing behind my back?"

She smirked up at me. "Maybe..."

I laughed again and leaned down to kiss her forehead. "That was pretty good, I'll give you that. But we won't make the same mistake twice, particularly me." I grabbed her hand and helped her up. She brushed herself off and I chuckled as I watched her. She shoved me aside when she passed and I grabbed her around the waist, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "Sorry, honey. I'll try not to be so rough next time."

She blushed, which made me chuckle again, and she shoved me away once more. "Don't you worry about being too rough. I don't intend to take it easy on you so give me the same courtesy."

"Okay," I laughed. "You asked for it."

She got into position again, smirking. "Bring it."

I positioned myself across the line, smirking right back at her. "Will do. Get ready to cry."

She shook her head, smirking wider when I winked at her.

"Hike!"

...

**BPOV**

"Jake," I whined as he stared down at me from above. "Do you have to tackle me _every_ time? I wasn't anywhere near the ball."

He smirked. "Yeah, I do. You're the guy I gotta watch and stop at all costs. You know how this works."

I rolled my eyes. "Sometimes, I swear you do this just to piss me off." I started pushing him off and getting up.

He watched me, his eyes lit with satisfaction. "I do. That's no secret."

I hit his arm and then shoved him, making him laugh. "What? I let you score that one touchdown, didn't I?"

I snorted. "Yeah, only because Adam intercepted you for me."

He rolled his eyes. "I should have known Loverboy wouldn't let you out of his sight."

I smacked his shoulder again and he chuckled. "Be nice. Or I won't give you the little goodies I brought you."

He grinned. "Goodies? Really? Where are they at?" He started glancing towards where the girls were sitting on the bench, where my bag was at. They giggled as he looked over. I rolled my eyes. Typical.

"Alright, water break," Sam called. Jake walked over with me to the bench and Kelly ran over to join us.

Before we reached it, Kelly and I watched as Skylar shamelessly flirted with Jared and John both. Katelyn was batting her eyes at Adam but to no avail. "Did you really have to bring those two?" Kelly asked me.

I shrugged. "I didn't really have a choice. They were at Jenna's and I didn't want to be rude."

Kelly scoffed in disgust when Skylar went to bend over to get a water out of her bag, making sure to present her backside to the two guys. "Ridiculous. Why don't they just start stripping while they're at it?"

"Kel, don't give them that idea. We'll never get them to put their clothes back on again and from the way they're hardcore flirting, trust me, I do not want _that_ on my seats." I saw Jake's eyes widen in shock and Kelly and I laughed. He shook his head in disbelief. "Damn," he muttered. We laughed again.

We finally reached the rest of the group and I grabbed my bag, digging through it. I handed Kelly her water, handed Jake his Gatorade I had bought him and picked out my own water. Jake smiled at the bottle in his hand, seeing I had bought his favorite flavor, and took a sip. "You're the best, Bells."

I shrugged again. "I know."

He chuckled again and wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me in for a small hug. "I didn't even think to bring a water."

I snorted. "As always. I knew you'd forget. You always do."

He shook his head, smirking, as he kissed the side of mine. I smiled and leaned into him. I saw Kelly watching us with narrowed eyes. Uh oh.

"Jake, come here a sec. We gotta talk strategy," Zack called, glaring in my direction because Jake was socializing with the 'other team'.

I blew him a kiss and Jake laughed when Zack stormed away. "Alright. Coming," he called, handing me his bottle and kissing my head one more time while smiling at me. "Hold that for me? I'll be back for it." I nodded and he smiled wider, jogging over to where Zack was fuming. Zack was very competitive when it came to sports; otherwise, he was a pussycat.

"Huh."

I put all my focus into rearranging things in my bag. "What's up, Kel?"

"Nothing. Just interesting, that's all."

I turned to give her a look. "_What's_ interesting?" I knew where she was going with this and I didn't want her to say it.

She shrugged one shoulder. "You two. Now I know why he's been tackling you and _only_ you."

I crossed my arms. "And why is that?"

"He's really into you. You realize that, don't you?"

I blushed and bit my lip, looking down at my bottle and his sitting together on the bench. "We're best friends and we're close. I told you about that."

"I know and, yeah, that's obvious but...it seems a bit more than that."

I shook my head, refusing to even consider her theory; I knew better. "It's not."

"So, it doesn't bother you that Katelyn just went over to him and is touching his arm, flirting with him?"

My head snapped in their direction. "What?" Sure enough, there was Katelyn, practically feeling up his bicep, smiling flirtatiously. Jake to my great surprise smiled back and talked with her. I saw him tossing the ball in his hands constantly as they spoke. I felt my annoyance rocket higher than normal not just with Katelyn and her antics but also with Jake's response to her. Not two days ago Jake had made it a point to tell me that he had no interest in pursuing a relationship. He didn't give any woman the time of day, couldn't be bothered, wanted nothing to do with them but suddenly Katelyn shows up and he changes his mind? Women far more beautiful and sexier, older and more accomplished, had thrown themselves at him constantly and he had ignored each and every one of them. So, what was so special about Katelyn? And why right where I could do nothing but watch? I forced myself to shrug nonchalantly and cut my eyes back to the field in front of me as I sipped my water. "Whatever. That's his business. We're just friends, nothing more."

Kelly glanced at me knowingly but mercifully, let it go. "So, why didn't you invite Andrew and the guys to play with us?"

I shrugged again. "He and Jake don't really get along too well. Andrew's alright with the other guys but he doesn't care for Jake."

"Can't imagine why," Kelly muttered, taking a sip of her water.

I glared at her but didn't respond to that comment. "Anyway, I'm seeing Andrew tonight already."

"Ah, yes, I forgot about that. How are you holding up? You nervous?"

Kelly was a new student that had moved to our town over the summer. I had met her before school started; we were both at the bookstore I was working at now (but was only a customer back then) and she was trying to pick a new book to read. She asked me what I thought when she picked up Fifty Shades of Grey and before I could say anything, she burst out into laughter. "You should have seen your face. Way to sell to the customer there, chick. Exactly what I was thinking." We'd been friends ever since. I wasn't as close with her say as Lindsey or even Jess but she was rapidly becoming a very good friend. So much so that I had asked her advice about what to expect later tonight since I knew she had experience in that area with a couple of ex-boyfriends in the town she had moved from. She had been extremely supportive and willing to answer any questions I had as well as share some advice.

"A little," I said quietly.

She laid a hand on my shoulder. "You'll be fine, Bells." She had taken to calling me that nickname when Nick had mistakenly called me it once in front of her, when he had tried to step into Jake's shoes and be there for me when Jake hadn't been; little did he know at the time that Jake's shoes were ones incapable of being filled by anyone but Jake. Something Andrew had known himself since the beginning. "It all seems nervewracking at first but once you get through it, you see that it really isn't as a big a deal as it's made out to be. Sex is just sex." I nodded, being jerked out of my thoughts by her voice.

"Bella," Katelyn called me. I turned to see her hurrying over towards me. "Can you hand me my bag, please?"

I nodded robotically and did as she asked. She smiled and accepted the bag gratefully. "Thanks." I watched her pull out an old receipt, flip it over and write her name and number down. She tossed the pen back in, placed her bag next to mine again, smirked up at us and winked before walking away. I stared in horror while she made her way to Jake and handed him the paper. My heart clenched in my chest when I saw him accept it and slip it into his pocket, grinning at her as he did. Katelyn leaned in flirtatiously, said something low enough that only he could hear and Jake laughed, never once putting restoring the proper distance that should be between them. I couldn't watch anymore; I felt a huge collapsed feeling in my chest and turned away back to Kelly, who was watching me with sympathetic eyes.

I shrugged, plastering on a smile. "Seems like Jake will have his own date tonight to look forward to." It killed me to even think it.

...

**JPOV**

I smiled and waved as I left Bella's friend and headed back over to where Bella and her other friend, Kelly, were. The girl, Katelyn was her name, was nice and reminded me a lot of Bella actually. In a lot of ways, they were very similar. They were both soft spoken yet had that fiery bit of wit; they were both kind, beautiful and intelligent. Within three minutes of talking to her, Katelyn had proven to be beyond her eighteen years. She was smart as a whip and wasn't the typical teenager, an old soul, just like Bella. When she insisted on giving me her number, I tried to politely decline but when I saw the faint hurt in her doe eyes, I couldn't turn her down. She reminded me so much of Bella that I found myself full of sympathy for her. Katelyn was beautiful (the most beautiful eighteen year old I had ever seen), no doubt about it, and I was sure she had no trouble finding guys of any age to give her attention if she wanted it. But, remembering how things had been for Bella in school when I had lived with her, I wondered if Katelyn struggled like Bella did sometimes with connecting to people her age. Granted, they both had friends from school and had no problems socially but the connecting thing...I had to wonder. Ultimately, I chose to take her number like she offered and planned to pull her on the side and talk to her privately, explaining why I wasn't a possibility, even for just a hook up. Normally, I wouldn't even care about this girl's feelings. Not that I was a dick or anything, but something about this girl just made me want to protect her from getting hurt and publicly rejecting her was not the way to go. It was strange but I couldn't deny the compulsion I had to handle this situation delicately. So, when she brought the paper back, I took it, folded it, and put it into my pocket. I'd have to get rid of it as soon as I was able, after I had been able to talk to her alone and let her down gently. There was only one girl whose number I wanted in my phone and I already had it.

I saw Bella talking to Adam who was smiling shyly at her. She gave him a hug and I glared in their direction. Adam seriously needed to move on and focus his attention on someone else already. Maybe I could hook him up with Katelyn. I had seen her trying to talk to him before but he had blatantly ignored her. Maybe if I handled the introductions...

"So, you and Bella are best friends, huh?"

My head snapped in the direction of the voice that interrupted my thoughts. Bella's other friend, Kelly, was smirking at me.

I cleared my throat and grabbed my Gatorade from the bench, trying to pretend that Bella's being oblivious to my presence a few feet from her because she was transfixed on her conversation with Adam didn't hurt. "Yeah. We've known each other for a while now. Feels like forever." I took a sip, mentally telling myself to man up and stop acting like a giant pussy. So, she was talking to Adam. Big deal. Bella didn't see Adam that way and I knew she never would. So, what was I worried about?

"Huh. So you're like the big brother to her kind of?"

I winced, not managing to school my expression in time, and I knew she saw it but I tried to play it off anyway as if she hadn't. "Uh, yeah. I guess you could say that."

"Uh huh," she said, her tone indicating she didn't believe me one bit.

I didn't really fucking care what she thought. What Bella thought was my only concern, not what her friends whom I had just met thought.

"So, Bella has a date tonight and it seems like you do as well?"

"Huh?" I turned to look at her in surprise.

"Bella said you had a date?" Whoa. Wait...what?

"No," I frowned, looking back over in Bella's direction. "Why would she say that?" I muttered to myself.

"I don't really know. I mean, Katelyn wrote her number down and handed it to you. Maybe it's because of that? Or maybe she meant you were meeting up with somebody else?"

Fuck! "Uh, no." I put the bottle back down. I was going to clear this up right now. "Excuse me for a second."

"Sure." Kelly shrugged, starting to stretch out in preparation for the game to resume.

I started walking towards Bella, seeing her laugh at something Adam said, making something inside my chest burn. I just wanted to grab her, pull her into my car and drive us away. I just wanted her all to myself. Even if only for an afternoon.

...

**BPOV**

"Aww, Adam. Don't worry. We'll kick their butts." He laughed and I smirked. "What?"

"You. Saying the word butt. That's so unlike you. It's just so...wrong."

I laughed. "You definitely don't know me very well then. Just wait, soon I'll be coming out with 'ass'." We both laughed.

I felt arms wrap around me and a chin rest on my right shoulder. "What are you two laughing about?" I hated that my body tingled where he touched. I hated that he even thought it was okay to touch me after what I had just been forced to witness, knowing he had lied to me and told me only what I wanted to hear. Again.

I gave Adam a conspiratorial wink. "Nothing." Adam just laughed again, shaking his head.

"Nothing, huh? It doesn't sound like nothing," Jake breathed into my ear, making my heart race just that much faster. Damn him. Adam frowned and I just smiled warmly over at him.

"Adam, excuse us for a second, would you?" Jake asked curtly.

Adam glared at him but gave a short nod. His face then relaxed as he smiled sadly at me before walking away. I felt bad. Adam and I didn't get to talk that much. I silently vowed to change that. Maybe he and I could be friends and this...crush he had on me would soon pass. I liked Adam; he was a good guy.

"Jacob," I growled.

"What?" He chuckled in my ear. "I can't get some time with my girl?"

I scowled and turned in his arms. "_Your_ girl?" I seethed.

He leaned his forehead down to mine and I could see him wrestling with what to say. He knew that I had seen him; knew that I was aware of Katelyn's number sitting in his right pocket. I waited for him to admit it, to tell me it wasn't what I thought but instead, he just smiled sadly at me and kissed my nose. "_My_ Bells."

I snorted, trying not to let him see how much that hurt me, and pulled out of his grip. "I'm sorry. You must be mistaking me for Katelyn. She's that way." I gestured in her direction with my thumb, hating how jealous I had just sounded, loathing that I was just that - jealous.

His face fell but I didn't allow him to make me feel bad for saying it. He had lied to me...again. And he only saw me as his Bells, the geeky teenage girl he had met a few years ago...again. After I foolishly allowed Kelly to plant a tiny seed of hope that maybe I was wrong, that he just might- No. I wouldn't allow Jake to do this to me again. No.

"Bells-"

"Don't," I snapped. "What you do is your business, not mine. Or _who_ you do," I spat at him before breaking free of his hold and making my way back over to Kelly, trying to pretend that my heart hadn't just been ripped in two...yet again.

...

**JPOV**

I watched as she spoke to Kelly, forcing laughs here and there while she ignored me. Oh, yeah. She was pissed. Fucking hell.

Had I known that by trying to keep from hurting a girl's feelings would hurt my best girl's, I would've never given Katelyn the time of day. I should've fucking known better. Shit.

I took a deep breath and stood there for a minute, thinking, my hands on my hips as I stared off into space. I thought back to the emails and cards I had memorized word for word; how hurt Bella had been at my constant snubbing and putting distance between us; how destroyed she looked on the ground the day of the party, stabbing me in the chest with so much pain I had to turn and walk away or I'd be right down on the ground with her, begging her forgiveness and promising her anything she wanted, even if it meant getting rid of my girlfriend; how mierable I'd been without her...

My decision was made and before I knew it, I had walked up right behind Bella, wrapping my arms back around her and holding her tightly to me so she couldn't escape. Kelly's shocked expression turned into a smirk. "I'll just give you two a minute." She was gone before Bella could protest.

I sat down on the bench and pulled her into my lap, kissing the side of her head, ignoring her attempting to pull away from me. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "Please don't be mad."

She blew out an angry breath when she realized she couldn't wiggle her way out of my grip. "I'm not mad. Like I said, what you do is your business. Not mine."

"Stop acting like it doesn't bother you."

"It doesn't." She jutted out her chin defiantly, refusing to look at me. She stared out over the field and I snuck a glance over in the girls' direction. Katelyn was watching us, sadly. I felt the guilt consume me. Exactly what I wanted not to happen did. But, Bella came first before anyone else. I would never make that mistake again. Ever.

"Look, Bella, I just didn't want to hurt her feelings. If you saw Katelyn watching us right now, you'd see that her feelings got hurt anyway." I saw Bella peek over discreetly and then felt her tense against me. "As bad as I feel for doing it, all that matters to me right now is you. That's how it's always going to be. Even when I'm some old fart in a nursing home who can't keep my teeth in for more than five minutes." She laughed and I smiled, nuzzling the side of her head, happy when I felt her relax slightly against me at the action. "I'm going to make sure you're right down the hall from me and I'm going to be bugging the crap out of you everyday. But, you can't make me run after you then. My walker won't go that fast." She laughed again and wrapped her arms around mine, relaxing completely against me, making me smile wider. "I'll share my pudding cups with you."

She snorted. "Yeah, right. You'd eat yours and mine, who are you kidding?"

"I said I'd share them, I never said they'd have anything left in them."

She giggled and turned, smiling. "Typical." I grinned, happy that she wasn't as mad as she'd been moments earlier.

"Am I forgiven?" I ventured.

I held my breath, waiting, as she studied me, hoping like hell I was. Just when I started to think that maybe I wasn't and wondered what I could do to make things between us good again, she gave me a soft smile and kissed my cheek sweetly. She wrapped her arms around my neck, hugged me awkwardly and I repositioned her so I could give her a full on hug, laying her legs over mine.

I sighed in relief and squeezed her, closing my eyes and burrowing into her neck, inhaling her scent. God, she always smelled so incredible. "Thank you," I whispered. I brushed my lips against her skin as an additional silent thank you, like I always had in the past, and felt her tense up. Shit, shit, shit. I needed to do something and fast before she tried to push me away again. "Know what I was thinking?" I murmured.

She didn't relax, even when I started to rub her back gently, but sounded alright when she spoke after clearing her throat. "Uh oh. You were thinking?"

I opened my eyes and lifted my head to see her smirking at me but her eyes were tight. Shit. "Funny."

She shrugged and as I'd feared, got to her feet, leaving me there. "Okay, you were thinking."

I tried not to show how much that bothered me and stood as well, though reaching for my Gatorade so I had something in my hands that I could focus on. "Since that night at the movies and the other day, we really don't get a lot of time to just hang out. You know, just you and me. I was thinking you ought to come over tonight and we'll make it an old fashioned Jake and Bells night. What do you say?"

The smile she had turned on me started to fade and she bit her lip. Uh oh, not good. "Um, I would but...I kind of have a date tonight."

I tried not to show my disappointment. Kelly had said that, hadn't she? "Oh, uh...okay. Not a problem. We'll do it some other time then." I shrugged, giving her a smile though the last thing I felt like doing was smiling.

She studied me for a minute and then stepped over to me, surprising me, and wrapped her arms around me, laying her head down on my shoulder and staring up at me. I smiled wider at the unexpected show of affection, grateful she still wanted to hug me after the mistake I nearly just made and kissed her forehead tenderly while rubbing her back. This time she didn't tense up so I closed my eyes and let my lips linger on her skin, enjoying this rare moment we had together in the small bubble where only the two of us existed.

...

**BPOV**

I grabbed my bag and Kelly was laughing, talking to Adam. I smiled, watching them. I had seen Kelly eyeing Adam up and suddenly, an idea struck me. Why not? A short introduction later, Kelly and Adam had been talking nonstop. He had been shy and quiet at first but Kelly kept pushing the conversation and soon, he was saying more than I had ever seen him say since I had known him, even around the guys. I was happy to see him coming out of his shell a little bit; Kelly had a way of doing that to you. He was a good guy and he deserved a good girl. Kelly was a bit...rough around the edges and more brazen than he was used to but maybe that was just what he needed.

"So, what night are you thinking you want to come over?"

I turned to see Jake frowning in Adam's direction. I rolled my eyes. He would never let up on the poor guy, even when he was talking to another girl. "I don't know. I could come over tomorrow night if you like. Or maybe during the week or even sometime next weekend. You tell me."

His eyes slid to mine. "Tomorrow night would be good. You sure I can't get you to reschedule this date?" He smiled at me hopefully, teasing lightly.

"Sorry. I really can't. But I'll be by tomorrow," I said softly.

He smiled wider as we walked to the cars side by side. "Sounds good. So, what are you guys going to do tonight? Movies? Bowling? Mini-golf?"

I laughed and blushed, not really wanting to tell him what Andrew and I had planned. "Mini-golf? I don't think I've ever played that."

He grinned. "I'll have to teach you then. Sounds like a good plan for Thursday night." He winked at me.

I laughed again, shaking my head. "We'll see. We both know I'm not exactly the most coordinated person in the world when it comes to sports. Using a golf club, that's asking for trouble."

He laughed with me. "True. But as long as I'm there and show you how to actually use it, you'll be a pro."

I stopped, his statement making the wheels turn in my head. A radical idea popped into my brain and I blushed at the thought. Should I really be thinking-

He stopped, too and looked back. "Bells, what's wrong? You okay?"

My brows were furrowed when I looked up at him, thankfully jerked out of my crazy thoughts. "Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry. Actually, you know what?" I started walking again and so did he. "I'm supposed to go to Andrew's at eight thirty. Would it be alright if I stopped by first? Say, around eight?" What the hell was I doing? This was not a good idea, not at all...

His brows furrowed as well. "Ah, sure. I'll be there. Got nothing else planned for later." He winked at me and I dropped my gaze to the ground, too ashamed to look into his face with what I had just been thinking. No way could I do that to Andrew never mind to Jake and I. But talking to Jake about the topic, as embarrassing as it would be, well...that was just talking... And he was my best friend... Jake _knew_ me like I knew him. He would know what to do. Why not? It would be good to get the guy's perspective now that I had Kelly's and Lindsey's both...wouldn't it?

I nodded, my mind made up before I could cowardly find an excuse not to go. "Great. I'll come by then."


End file.
